예일대생 음악 배틀, 기숙사 룸메이트끼리 음악으로 붙다



엄청난 재능이군요. 시시한 악기.. 아니 악기가 아닌 것들을 이용해서 예일대생 두명이 배틀을 붙었습니다.

사건의 발단은 리코더를 가지고 장난을 치던중, 룸메이트가 리코더로는 제대로된 음악은 절대로 못만든다며 리코더를 디스하게 됩니다.

이에 리코더를 가지고 음악을 만들었습니다.





이걸 본 룸메는 실로폰을 가지고 음악을 만들어 버립니다.

결투 신청을 한 것이죠.







이걸 본 학생은 장난감 실로폰으로 반격에 나섭니다.






룸메는 이에 겜보이로 반격을 합니다.







학생은 오카리나로 반격을 하지요.







오카리나 공격을 받은 룸메는 ZITHER 라는 악기를 이용해서 역공을 합니다.







이에 룸메의 핸드폰을 훔쳐서 반격을 합니다.






더 이상 힘들었는지, 룸메는 엽기적인 재료를 가지고 음악을 만들어 버립니다.





재미있는 친구들이네요 ㅋㅋ


마지막으로 둘이 같이 노래를 부른 영상입니다. ( 날짜상으론 배틀하기 전이네요 )






멋진 젊은이들이네요 ㅋㅋ



  1. BlogIcon HyunJun 2011.11.14 09:35 신고

    재밌네..
    아침부터 귀가 호강햇네.^^

  2. BlogIcon 해우기 2011.11.14 11:41 신고

    헉....이런 대단한.....
    갑자기 ..이런 삶들이 너무 열정이....

    부럽습니다....

  3. BlogIcon 자수리치 2011.11.14 11:42 신고

    둘 다 재능이 대단합니다. 동영상 정말 재밌게 봤습니다. 꼬마낙타님^^

  4. 오진다 2012.12.16 23:29 신고

    첫번째 리코더로한 노래 제목이 머죠??

  5. BlogIcon 全讯网网址 2013.07.25 17:05 신고

    좋은
      第二局比赛,陈丽怡发球连得两分后天津队6-2领先,王佳敏快球得手天津女排8-5领先进入第一次技术暂停。暂停后魏秋月发球得分天津女排9-5扩大优势,但浙江队拦死陈丽怡进攻将比分追至8-10,此后殷娜强攻得手、浙江队进攻出界帮助天津队16-12领先进入第二次暂停。暂停后浙江队利用邱亚楠后排进攻追至14-16,但天津队很快利用反击20-14再次拉开比分,尽管随后浙江队请求暂停但收效不大,最终天津队凭借殷娜拦网得分、陈丽怡后排进攻命中,天津女排25-18再胜一局。

      0-2落后浙江队第三局开局4-2取得领先,汪慧敏的强攻和浙江队发球得分保证浙江队8-5领先进入第一次技术暂停, http://jinhaian.hyguoji.pw 金海岸国际娱乐城。暂停后天津女排凭借殷娜调整攻将比分追至10-11,随后殷娜强攻命中、王佳敏快球得分、浙江队进攻失误,天津女排13-12反超比分迫使浙江队暂停,但暂停后殷娜反击和拦网得分、魏秋月拦网得手、陈丽怡后攻命中,加之浙江队再次失误,天津女排18-12扩大优势,随后浙江队李静扣球失误,天津女排21-14确定胜势,最终随着浙江女排进攻失误,天津女排25-19拿下第三局,总比分3-0战胜对手迎来四连胜,而此役失利的浙江女排则遭遇四连败。


드로잉의 신, 어때요 참 쉽죠?



제가 부러워하는 재능 중에 예술적 감각이 있습니다. 그 중에서도 그림 잘 그리는 친구들이 정말 부럽더군요. 사진처럼 사물을 묘사하는 모습 혹은 사람의 특징을 딱 잡아내서 캐리켜쳐하는 것을 뒤에서 보고 있자면 감탄이 절로 나옵니다. 어렸을 때부터 미술은 정말 젬병이라 내가 가지지 못 한 것에 대한 동경이라고 해야 할까요?





동영상을 보시면 구겨진 종이를 똑같이 묘사한 그림을 옆에다 그리는 과정을 보여주고 있습니다. 처음에는 개략적인 스케치만 하다 점점 구체적인 형태를 잡아가는데, 특히 그림자를 묘사한 부분, 명암을 묘사한 부분에서는 정말 입이 딱 벌어지네요.

부러운 재능입니다. !!!
  1. BlogIcon 황자 2011.09.21 00:21 신고

    우와~ 정말 대단하네요~
    저도 그림에 소질이 없어서 신기할 따름입니다~ㅎ

  2. BlogIcon 별이 2011.09.21 00:53 신고

    진자 신기할 따름이네요. 입이 쩌어억~^^
    오늘 하루도 잘보내셨죠^^ 행복한 저녁 되세요^^

  3. BlogIcon 멀티라이프 2011.09.21 06:38 신고

    앗! 이거 진작에 봤었지요 ㅎㅎ
    3분안에 정말 다 그렸다면 잘 그리는건 맞는데...
    미대 준비하는 학원에 가보면 저정도는 전부 그리니 ㅎㅎ;;
    그래도.. 이렇게 영상으로 찍어서 자신을 PR한 성의는 멋집니다.

  4. BlogIcon 해우기 2011.09.21 10:44 신고

    미술에 대한 소질이 전혀 없는 저같은 사람은..
    너무 부럽습니다....

  5. BlogIcon 아하라한 2011.09.21 12:58 신고

    흐미 저처럼 완전 그림에 개발세발인 사람은 부럽기만 하답니다. ㅠㅠ

  6. BlogIcon 보기다 2011.09.21 14:02 신고

    와~ 이건 뭐...
    얼마나 연습하면 이리 그릴 수 있을까요?
    멋지네요.

  7. BlogIcon 삼성화재 2011.09.21 17:50 신고

    헐... 구겨질 걸 그림으로 표현하다니;;; 정말 대단하신 분 같습니다;;;

  8. BlogIcon e마루 2011.09.21 22:59 신고

    미술적 감각이 없는 저에게는 신의손으로 보이네요;;;

  9. s2용 2011.09.21 23:07 신고

    와~! 대단합니다 정말 !! ㅎㅎㅎ

  10. BlogIcon 와이군 2011.09.22 11:28 신고

    헉... 구겨진걸 그리다니 -_-;;;
    엄청나네요~

  11. 单数和复数

    老师:“尼克,你懂得单数和复数了吗?”
    尼克:“懂得了。”
    老师:“那你说说看,‘裤子’是单数还是复数?”
    尼克:“上面是单数,下面是复数。”

    兽 中 之 王

    “同学们,谁是兽中之王?”老师问。
    “动物园园长。”小约翰回答。

    母 亲

      语文老师正在台上讲高尔基的代表作《母亲》这一课,而学友却在桌下打逗,被
    老师发现了,老师叫起学友问:“你听见我讲课的内容了吗? ”学友回答:“听得一
    清二楚。”老师继续问:“那么《母亲》这个标题是什么意思呢?”学友响亮地回
    答:“一定是高尔基的母亲吧!”

    作 文

      作文课上,老师出的题目是《欢乐的元旦》,要求每个同学具体、详细地描述元
    旦那天热闹的场面和欢乐的情怀。没过几分钟,小涛就交卷了,老师一看,上面写
    道:“元旦那天太热闹了,我的心情激动得简直无法用语言描述。

    回 答

      英语课上,教师正大谈中西方语言差异,有学生举手提问:“老师,
    ‘饺子’在英语中怎么说?”教师面有愠色,叱之:“无知至极!人家英
    国人不吃饺子!”

    同 桌 轶 事

      一日,地理课上,老师发现了同桌正与人交头接耳,就把他叫了起来
    问:“刚才我讲的什么?”同桌答:“老师讲的是伊朗。”老师又问:“
    伊朗首都在哪里?”“德兰黑。”“什么”“黑德兰。”全班大笑。

    成功之母

      有一天,历史教师在上课.教师问同学:"谁能讲出历史上的郑成功是
    何许人?"有位学生站起来说:"郑成功是何许人我不清楚, 可我知道谁是
    他的母亲!"教师说:"你怎么知道他的亲?"学生说:"是的,他的母亲叫"失
    败"!老师不是常说"失败是成功之母吗?"

    歪 打 正 着

    老师在黑板上写上"扑朔迷离",然后问一位学生:"请你说一
    下这个成语是什么意思?"学生站起来,推了一下深度近视眼镜
    ,仔细看了一下黑板上的四个字,看了半天也不明白,最后他无
    可奈何地说:"老师,看不清楚。"老师说:"你说对了,请坐
    下。"

    尚 未 发 生

    某男生到女生宿舍访其女友,该宿舍的门卫要他填写一份会客单
    其上要填写姓名、性别、地址、年龄、...一直填写到最后一
    栏“关系”时,该男生想了半天才写下“尚未发生”四个字。

    误 答

    考试时,一首试题是:鲁迅是__人。一位马虎的学生在考试前
    没有认真复习,他把鲁迅原名“周树人”的“树”字看错了,于
    是他回答为:鲁迅是周村人。

    赏 识 问 答

    老师:“你脚上穿的鞋是什么做的?”
    学生:“是皮做的。”
    老师:“皮是从哪里来的?”
    学生:“牛身上来的。”
    老师:“那么,供给你皮鞋穿,又供给你肉吃的动物是什么?”
    学生:“是爸爸。”

    一个聪明办法

    一家中学校长面临着一个问题,校内年长的女学生开始擦口红。当她们在洗手间里擦
    口红时,她们会将嘴唇印在镜子上留下唇印。在这个问题变得不可收拾之前,他想到
    一个方法阻止。于是他召集所有擦口红的女生并要她们下午2点在洗手间集合。当女
    孩们在2点到洗手间时发现校长及舍监已在那等候。校长对她们解释这个问题让舍监
    每天晚上都得清理洗手间的镜子。他认为女孩们并不了解问题的严重性所以他要她们
    自己目睹镜子有多难清理。接着舍监便开始示范。舍监由盒内拿出了一把长柄刷子,
    拿到最近的马桶里沾水后,接着走到镜子前面开始刷洗镜子。
      那以后再也没人把唇印留在镜子上。

    信口回答

    彼得是一个聪明的孩子.但因其贪玩,所以学习成绩不是很好.有一次 ,语文课老师
    问他:"你知道《罗密欧与朱丽叶》是谁的作品?"彼得懒洋 洋地回答:"我怎么会
    知道呢?像我这么大的孩子是不喜欢看莎士比亚作品 的."

    爸爸和妈妈

    老师:"一个长来一个短,一个快来一个慢,短的生来懒得动,长
    的忙得团团转,猜这是什么?"
    学生:"爸爸和妈妈。"

     

    先 生

    儿子:"今天老师教我们说‘是的,先生。’和‘不,先生。’"
    父亲:"你学会了吗?"
    儿子:"不,先生。"
    父亲:"管爸爸不能叫先生。"
    儿子:"是的,先生。"

    减 法

    数学课上,教师对一位学生说:“你怎么连减法都不会?例如,你
    家里有十个苹果,被你吃了四个,结果是多少呢?”这个学生沮丧
    地说道:“结果是挨了十下屁股!”

    抽 烟

      两个学生在看法典时是否能抽烟的问题上争论不休。他们找教授评理,认为不能
    抽烟的说:“教授,看法典时能抽烟吗?”教授严肃地说:“当然不能!”认为可以
    抽烟的学生马上问:“那抽烟时看法典行吗?”“那没问题。”教授回答。

    结 论

      课堂上教授对学生一连串的提问不胜烦恼,无可奈何地说:“一个傻瓜提出的问
    题比十个聪明人能回答的问题还要多。”学生:“难怪考试的时候我们那么多人不及
    格。”

    活 学 活 用

      美国一所法律学校, http://www.indianapoliscoltshop.com/ Andrew Luck Blue Jersey,有一天考刑法。教授向学生提出的第一个问题是:
    "什么叫诈骗罪?"一个学生回答说:"如果您不让我考试及格则犯诈骗
    罪。"教授非常诧异:"你怎么解释这个问题?""根据刑法,凡利用他
    人的无知而使其蒙受损失的人则犯诈骗罪。"

    一 年 两 季

     格桑家里开了个小店,有时格桑放学回家,也帮着照应一下。一天,
    地理老师问他:“一年有几季?”“?”。“没错,淡季和旺季。”

    样样都行

       我教的中文班有一个美国留学生约翰,他对方块字充满了浓厚的兴
    趣。有一天,约翰上街回来找到我的办公室:“老师,我觉得你们中国人
    很不谦虚。”“为什么?”我感到惊讶。“大街上,我看到许多大招牌,
    都是自我炫耀,比如:中国很行,中国人民很行,中国农业很行......他
    把“银”看成“很”了。

    在清华图书馆的普通阅览室, 坐着一位男生A君, 他的对面坐着一位
    非常漂亮的B小姐, A 不时地打量着 B, 并希望B能看他自己一眼,
    两个小时过去了, B小姐仍埋头看书.这时, A 的邻座 C 君放了一个
    奇臭无比的无声的闷屁, B 小姐捂着鼻子抬头瞪了A两眼.........

    教授在考试当天突然宣布延期考试 ,有个学生立即理直气壮地站起来抗议,
    说延期会扰乱他温习其他科目的计划。教授立刻问,「你叫什麽名字?」
    「王大明」学生的口气有些软化。 「好吧,王同学 ,我给你一个甲等,
    而且免你参加考试,因为你有胆量据理直言,这正是教育的最重要目的。」
    学生答道,「既然这样,那麽,我的本名叫做李小华 。」

    在大学里,我每天的生活都千篇一律:上课,自修,工作,然后睡觉。有一天,我接到
    了下面的短信,才发觉自己已经好久没有写信回家了。
    “爱儿:你母亲和我收到你的一封信时,心里都很高兴。当然,那时我们都年轻得多,
    比较容易感动。父字。”

    哭笑不得有一次,弟弟上历史课的时候,老师问他:“谁是路易十四?”他答:“路易
    十四不就是路易十加路易四吗!”老师听后几乎给气炸了,没好气地道:“你怎么不说是路
    易七乘路易二呢?”哪知道弟弟不假思索便说:“老师,从数学来说,路易七乘路易二应是
    路易平方十四,因此你错了。”
    老师为之结舌,哭笑不得。

    回答语文老师教到《志摩日记二则》时,解释徐志摩所说:“数大”便是美的概念,例
    如:从无极的蓝空中下窥大地,是美;泰山顶上的云海,高大的云峰在晨光里镇定着,是
    美……老师问班上的小邦道:“你还可以举别的例子说明‘数大便是美’吗?”小邦随即答
    道:“钞票。”

    双喜临门我学院的有位女老师怀孕了,挺着大肚子走来走去。刚巧中学会考成绩公布,
    她的大女儿考获六科甲等。她十分高兴,忙把好消息告知学生。其中一个学生听了,便开玩
    笑地说:“真是双喜临门,母女同时身怀‘六甲’。”

  12. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    *不因季节的变化而不想你,不因时间的推移而忘记你。你在动物园还好吗?老虎还欺负你吗?猴子还嘲笑你吗?野猪还和你抢食吗?用小前爪看短信还习惯吗?

      *你知道我们的友谊,对我充满了丰富的含意,你哭的时候我也哭,你笑的时候我也笑,你从高楼跳出去,我也会毫不犹豫的探出头去,大喊:哇噻!不死才怪!

      *那天我说:“你是猪。”你说:“我是猪才怪。”于是以后我就叫你“猪才怪”!终于有一天,你忍无可忍当着众人的面大叫:“我不是猪才怪!”

      *老兄,你知道我那天为什么挨骂吗?我看见那靓妹胸前衣服的字下面有下划线,就忍不住伸手点击了一下。

      *上帝送给我一个宝盆,想啥它就变啥。我不小心想了你一次,它变出一个你。我止不住想,它就不住变。最后满屋都是你,我就愁呀!这么多小猪我咋喂呢?

      *远看厕所冒青烟,进看厕所多壮观,飞流直下三泼屎,一看兜里没有纸。

      *蚂蚁和大象结婚了,可没几天大象就死了。蚂蚁非常伤心,一边哭,一边骂道:亲爱的,你怎么走我前面了,这辈子我他妈不用干别的了,就埋你了!

      *很怀念乡下的那段日子,你在我前面欢快地小跑,哼着小曲,乡亲们都夸你又干净又漂亮!也夸我:这么小就出来放猪。

      *今天有人看见你了,你还是那样迷人,穿着格子背心,慢悠悠地走着,一副超然自在的样子,实在是可爱极了,真不知你当年是怎么赛过兔子的。


    猪的种类:养在家里的是家猪,生在山中的是野猪,读这信息的是蠢猪,如果在笑是傻猪,如果生气是笨猪,不回信息是死猪

    在我眼里,你看上去永远是无忧无虑,吃饭永远是津津有味,睡觉永远是酣然而睡……我真羡慕你呀,唉,有时候想想,像你那样做头猪也挺好的!

    人活着真累!站着真想睡,上车得排队,吃饭没香味,上班特疲惫,上学真无为。唉!就连给猪发个短信都收费。

    一个神经病躺在床上唱歌,唱着唱着,翻了个身继续唱,医生问他:你唱就唱吧,翻身干吗呀?神经病说:傻瓜,A面唱完当然唱B面!

    读出下面的字,你将获得月薪2000000的工作,试题如下:簟璁醭歙艽绱癀穑魍旃偬彘硪钚鲥硐蓰。

    有一种默契,叫作心照不宣;有一种感觉,叫作妙不可言;有一种思念,叫作望眼欲穿;有一种白痴,会把短信看完。

    唐僧师徒三人来到火焰山,唐僧吩咐悟空借芭蕉扇,让沙僧找水,突然他大怒的向着猪八戎喊:死胖猪,你还有空看手机!

    读这讯息,你已欠我一个拥抱;删这讯息,欠我一个吻;存这讯息,欠我一个约会;要是回复,你欠我全部;要不回复,你就是我的

    你在偷偷想我吗?你真的是在偷偷想我吗?如果你真的想我就告诉我啊,我不会不让你想我的,大家讲道理嘛,我也想你啊

    我昨晚梦到你了:我们漫步在小河边,相互依偎着。你抬头凝视着我的眼睛,深情地吐出三个字……汪汪汪

    小猪很伤心地哭着。妈妈问:哭什么?小猪说:我觉得自已很笨。妈妈安慰他:孩子,别哭,看这条短信的人比你还笨呢!

    男人不坏,有点变态;男人不骚,是个草包。男人不花心,绝对有神经;男人不流氓,发育不正常。

    恭喜你中了大奖,请于今天晚上十点整,带着马刀、鸟枪、土炮到中国人民银行蒙面领取。

    有句话一直想对你说,可你知道它的分量,一旦说出,可能咱连朋友都没法做了,但我控制不住感情……啥时候请我吃饭

    不许动!抢劫!全部举起手来!男的站左边,女的站右边。变态的站中间,说你呢,还在看短信!

    遇见你是偶然的,喜欢你是自然的,爱上你是毅然的,得到你是欣然的,伴你一生是必然的。

    我们要天天思念,但不要天天相见。我负责美丽妖艳,你负责努力赚钱。你可以和别人相恋,但不要让我发现,若被我碰见,哼……耗子药煮面!

    在一辆拥挤的公车上,一位女郎忽然叫了起来:别挤啦!别挤啦!把人家的奶都挤出来啦!(她拿着酸奶呢)

    我有眼睛却不能随时看见你身影,有耳朵却不能随时听到你声音,有手却不能随时抱着你,但我有颗心能随时想念你

    紧急提醒:看看你的左边,再看看你的右边。请小心一个刚溜出来的精神病,他的特征是:拿着手机东张西望。

    一个人一生可以爱上很多人的,等你获得真正属于你的幸福之后,你就会明白以前的伤痛其实是一种财富,它让你学会更好地去把握和珍惜你爱的人。

    警告:您的手机因超负荷使用,内部发生烈变,即将爆炸,请看完本提示后立即将手机丢与空旷无人处……

    我喜欢在你身上爬来爬去,喜欢抚摩你的每寸肌肤,喜欢躺在你的怀抱,我一刻也离不开你,我爱你--沙发!

    爱你的心永不悔,想你的情永不退,想你想得无法睡,忘了你我学不会,一只小猪对着手机在陶醉!

    当我把神灯擦三下后,灯神问我想许什么愿?我说:我想你帮我照顾一个正在看短信的人,保佑那人永远平安幸福

    一尼姑去医院做B超,粗心的护士将一孕妇的化验单给了她。尼姑看了以后叹了口气道:“这年头,连胡萝卜都靠不住了, http://www.nbabgstore.com/ Spurs Danny Green Jersey。”

    众人皆醒我独醉,心有灵犀最珍贵。邂逅真情爱不悔,今生只为你相随(秘密在每一句的第五个字)

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

  13. BlogIcon Wholesale TVs for Sale 2013.03.17 16:42 신고

    For shopping in Chennai, http://www.wholesale-gogo.com/apple-ipad-apple-ipad-2-c-27_102.html iPad 2 for sale wholesale, especially related to conventional items and handicrafts, the best places are the Government Emporiums. Of course you cannot bargain here but the best price is guaranteed; in fact, the price of the items is less compared to those found in the normal shops. You will also find handicrafts specific to different regions of the country at Victoria Technical Institute at Anna Salaai. As per reviews, one of the best centres of shopping in Chennai for locally made handicrafts, textiles and papier-mache items is SIPA'S Craftlink. If you love handmade toiletries and organic foodstuff, Auroville will well serve your purpose.



    When you discover the historical importance of a particular city and dig out the facts, the joy associated with visiting the said city increases manifold. One city in the southern part of India that needs special mention is Chennai. To know about Chennai before you actually visit the city, do have access to the wealth of information online so that you do not miss on anything. Do not forget to make a note of the centres of shopping in Chennai besides also the centres of nightlife in Chennai. This will help you explore the city to the fullest.



    Clothing and socks in the store appeared to be two or three times. Tents were dirty and filthy and in the corner of the store, http://www.tv-wholesale.com/samsung-tv-samsung-tv-32-c-8_9.html Samsung LED TV for sale, he was also a lot of fire. A & F is always in style.



    The night does really come to life in the centres of nightlife in Chennai. Platinum Dance bar at Quality Inn Aruna, Flame Le Club disco at the Le Royal Meridien, http://www.wholesale-for-sale.com/apple-ipad-apple-ipad-mini-c-27_127.html Discount ipad 2 price, Sparks dance pub at Hotel Savera, MiXX dance pub at Country Suites, Dublin at the Park Sheraton Hotel, Pasha at The Park are few of the top centres of nightlife in Chennai.
    At that time, A & F is the supplier who offers products of sport for rich people. In the early 21st century could not bear longer Abercrombie, the sale of its stake in the company and retired management.



    Simple tips to keep clothes Fitch Fitch has decided to retain the first part Abercrombie to the company name out fast and make cool after that Fitch, the company could grow their own choice at the end.






    Chennai was popular as Pallavaram during the Megalithic period; there are evidences of megalithic instruments being recovered here. Various notable dynasties namely Pallava, Chera, Chola, Pandya, and Vijaynagar established their empires here one after another. Towards 1522, the Portuguese arrived near Chennai and built a port called S?o Tom��. Another mention about Chennai is the arrival of the Dutch in 1612, who established themselves in the north of the city near Pulicat. The more you read the more you can know about Chennai.

  14. BlogIcon pandora 2013.03.19 08:24 신고

    매우 지원 및 이월하고 있습니다.

  15. BlogIcon 上海佳吉快运 2013.03.22 21:49 신고

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  16. BlogIcon 子母钟 2013.03.22 21:50 신고

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  17. BlogIcon 上海佳吉快运 2013.03.22 21:51 신고

    上海聚起计算机科技有限公司是专业生产各类显示设备,计时仪器的综合公司,本公司有多年研制生产经验,技术先进,质量上乘, http://www.yingsheng.com.cn 打印机租赁.

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  19. BlogIcon 太阳城 2013.03.26 13:27 신고

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  20. BlogIcon harris leo 2013.03.26 23:36 신고

    늦게까


아카펠라 종결자, 혼자서 악기없이 입으로만 음악 만들기



아카펠라가 멋진 이유는 사람의 목소리만으로 하모니를 만들어 내기 때문일 것입니다. 드럼 비트도 사람의 입으로 내고, 베이스를 비롯해 일반적으로 악기를 이용해서 만들어내는 하모니를 사람의 입으로만 내기 때문에 더더욱 신기한데요.

아카펠라를 능가하는 셀프 아카펠라의 종결자가 있어 소개해드리겠습니다. 인터넷 동영상 공유사이트 유튜브에서는 이미 굉장히 유명한 분인데요. Mike Tompkins 라는 분입니다. 더빙의 종결자, 셀프 아카펠라의 종결자라고 할 수 있지요. 혼자서 드럼비트와 기타, 베이스 소리, 보컬 같은 소리를 전부 내고, 나중에 그걸 더빙하여 음악으로 만들어 내는 것입니다.

백문이 불여일견이라고 지금까지 올라온 동영상 중에서 몇 가지를 추려봤습니다.


1. Teenage Dream & Just the way you are





2. Dynamite - Taio Cruz





3. Maroon 5 - Misery





4. Rolling In The Deep





5. Katy Perry Firework




Mike Tompkins의 유튜브 채널로 가실분은 클릭하시기 바랍니다.




세상엔 정말 대단한 사람 많은것 같습니다. ㅋㅋ

여러분도 한번 도전해보세요 ~



  1. 이전 댓글 더보기
  2. BlogIcon 하늘엔별 2011.08.30 06:33 신고

    세상에는 정말 재주꾼들이 많습니다. ㅎㅎㅎ

  3. BlogIcon 주리니 2011.08.30 06:56 신고

    놀라운데요?
    세상에~~~

  4. BlogIcon 안다 2011.08.30 08:41 신고

    와~우 진정한 종결자로 인정합니다~!

  5. BlogIcon Hare's 2011.08.30 09:30 신고

    와,,,,진짜,,,감탄만 나오네요^^

  6. BlogIcon 신기한별 2011.08.30 10:40 신고

    음악 잘 듣고 갑니다. 멋진 하루 보내세요~

  7. BlogIcon 하늘이사랑이 2011.08.30 11:32 신고

    정말 신기하네요..잘보고 갑니당

  8. BlogIcon 와이군 2011.08.30 13:26 신고

    진정한 능력자로군요.
    놀랍습니다~~

  9. BlogIcon 이바구™ 2011.08.30 13:33 신고

    정말 대단하네요.
    스스로 다 해결하다니....

  10. BlogIcon 보기다 2011.08.30 14:29 신고

    정말 악기가 필요없네요.
    목소리가 세상에서 가장 뛰어난 악기인거 같습니다.
    잘 들었습니다.^^

  11. BlogIcon 사랑퐁퐁 2011.08.30 15:11 신고

    뭐 거의달인 수준이네요...
    재미있게 잘보구 갑니다.

  12. BlogIcon +요롱이+ 2011.08.30 15:28 신고

    우호 대박이네요!! ㅎ
    재밋게 잘 보고 즐겁게 잘 듣고 갑니다^^

  13. BlogIcon 스친기억파란하늘 2011.08.30 15:41 신고

    신기한 방법이네요 ㅎㅎㅎ

    +_+;; 진짜 대박! ㅎㅎ

  14. BlogIcon 머니모아 2011.08.30 17:46 신고

    정말 대단한 재주꾼들 많네요..
    재미있게 잘 보고 갑니다^^

  15. BlogIcon 삼성화재 2011.08.30 18:50 신고

    뭐 대단하다는말밖에...떠오르는게 없네요 ㅎㅎ

  16. BlogIcon cfono1 2011.08.30 18:55 신고

    한곡을 위해 몇 번을 녹음했을까요? ㅠㅠ

  17. BlogIcon bxstory 2011.08.30 23:45 신고

    대단합니다 정말.. 세상엔 신기한 사람이 너무 많네요 ㅎㅎ

  18. BlogIcon 별이 2011.08.31 00:58 신고

    정말 대단하네요. 신기해요...^^ 짱짱~~
    행복한 저녁 되세요^^

  19. 이 유용한 정보 주셔서 감사합니다 .. 좋은 일

  20. 난 정말이 블로그에 기사를 읽을 것을 좋아합니다. 공유 주셔서 감사합니다

  21. BlogIcon 云顶赌场 2013.07.25 17:12 신고

    좋은
    由于最后的转会要等到7月初,当然最重要的目标还是多拿分。而且新援抢眼,埋伏在后点的马丁抢点头槌攻门得分,让所有黄石领导和企业来共同打造黄石品牌。
    场地租金、保安费什么的,以目前黄石市体育场的各方面条件来看,凝聚力也更加强了, http://www.yzyulc.com 菲彩娱乐城, 第12分钟,21号童晓星接队友直塞球后面对深圳队门将一脚捅射,恐怕最后的结果不止是1比0!我们的团队是强大的团队。踢上比赛才最重要。途"。随后周熠再次为湖北队将比分超出。


플래시 몹의 종결자, 블랙아이드 피스 공연


인터넷 게시판을 보다보면 끊임없이 올라오는 게시물 중에 하나가 바로 플래시 몹입니다. 플래시 몹 중에는 진짜 소름이 돋을 정도로 완벽한 완성도를 보여주는 작품도 있고, 엉성하게 그냥 많은 사람들이 모여서 이상한 짓을 하는 완성도가 없는 플래시 몹도 있습니다. 오늘 소개해드릴 플래시 몹은 제가 본 플래시 몹 중에 완성도가 가장 높습니다. 보면서 소름 돋았습니다.



↑↑ 추천은 저의 힘이 됩니다. ^^ 구독하기+


인터넷에 "플래시 몹"이라고 검색을 하면 많은 플래시 몹 동영상들이 검색됩니다. 그 중에 기억에 남는 몇 가지가 "그랜드 센트럴 스테이션 플래시 몹"이 있었고, "마이클 잭슨 추모 플래시몹"이 있었습니다. 또 "그랜드 센트럴 역 동작그만 플래시몹" 도 있었지요.

Postcard from Shenzhen
Postcard from Shenzhen by jurvetson 저작자 표시


▶ 플래시 몹?

자꾸 플래시 몹, 플래시 몹 하는데 플래시 몹이란 무엇인지 정확히 한번 알아 보겠습니다. 플래시 몹은 네티즌이라는 단어처럼 두가지 서로 다른 단어가 합쳐진 합성어입니다. 플래시 크라우드( Flash crowd )라는 단어와 스마트 몹( Smart mob ) 이라는 단어가 합쳐진 단어입니다.

플래시 크라우드는 어떤 웹 사이트에 접속자가 폭증하는 현상을 일컫는 말이며, 스마트 몹은 PDA,휴대전화, 인터넷 등의 첨단 정보통신 기술을 바탕으로 네트워크를 형성하여 정치나 사회 전반적인 문제에 참여하는 사람들의 집단을 일컫는 말입니다.

이 두 단어가 합쳐져서 인터넷이나 휴대전화 같은 첨단 정보 통신 기술을 이용하여 순간적으로 모여서 어떤 행동을 하고 사라지는 것을 말합니다. 대부분 이메일이나 문자 메시지 같은 것으로 불특정 다수가 참여하며 참여를 한다음 모이지 않고 바로 흩어져 버리는 형태의 모임을 일컫는데요. 요즘은 그 의미가 많이 느슨해져서 많은 사람들이 갑자기 집단 행동을 할 때에도 플래시 몹이라는 단어를 쓰는듯 합니다.



▶ 블랙 아이드 피스의 플래시 몹

그럼 블랙 아이드 피스 공연의 플래시 몹을 감상하시겠습니다.






어때요 소름 돋지 않나요?

우리나라에서 플래시 몹 제대로 하면 집시법 위반으로 잡아가지 않을까 하는 걱정도 잠깐 해봅니다.

참고로 이 공연에 대한 정보는 오늘의 유머 댓글을 참고 하시기 바랍니다.

마지막으로 블랙 아이드 피스의 멤버인 윌 아이엠의 쿨한 인터뷰를 소개해 드리겠습니다.

백지연의 피플 INSIDE 中


"저는 불법 복제라는 개념을 이해하지 못 하겠어요

그 누구도 당신의 음악을 복제하고 싶지 않아 한다면

그게 더 두려운 것 아닐까요?

제 음악이 인터넷에 버젓이 올라가 있는데

아무도 관심을 갖지 않고 조회수도 1이란 초라한 기록이거나

그 누구도 불법 다운로드를 하지 않는 상황이 더 무서워요

불법 다운로드를 하고 싶다면 가져가서 들으라고 할 거예요

음악을 듣고 인생을 풍성하게 채우라고 말하고 싶어요

저는 그걸로 만족해요

오히려 아무도 듣고 싶어 하지 않는다면 그게 더 기분이 나쁠 것 같아요"


이 인터뷰 보고 많은 생각이 드네요. 외국의 경우는 모르겠지만 우리나라 같은 경우엔 음악을 하는사람.. 예술을 하는 사람보다 그것을 가져다 파는 유통 회사들이 더 많이 가져가는 구조입니다. 음악 시장을 소수의 지배적인 세력이 쥐고 있는 상황에서 음반 사서 듣는다고 상황이 개선될것 같지는 않습니다.

물론 정당하게 사서 듣는 풍토가 생겨야 함은 당연한 말입니다만, TV에 나와서 불법 다운로드 하지 말자, 사서 들어 달라고 말하는 사람들을 보면 아이돌이 많던데... 거기서 부터 공감이 안가더라구요;;

뭐 여기에 대해서 이야기를 줄줄 풀어 놓으면 몇 부작으로 써 낼 수도 있을 것 같으니 여기가지 줄이겠습니다. 이 자료 덕분에 블랙아이드피스라는 그룹을 알게 되었네요 ^^ ( 제가 아직 음악에 문외한입니다 ㅜㅜ )


우리나라도 이런 플래시 몹, 해보자구요 ㅋㅋ


  1. 이전 댓글 더보기
  2. BlogIcon 외계소년32 2011.06.01 12:53 신고

    멋지내요. 빨리 2ne1 과 함께 하는 블랙아이드피스를 보고 싶내요. 참고로 슈퍼볼 공연도 정말 멋있죠. ^^ i gotta feeling 이곡은 David guetta 와 만든곡인데 이 분의 앨범 정말 신납니다.

  3. BlogIcon ★안다★ 2011.06.01 13:00 신고

    우오오~진정 플래시 몹의 종결자다운 공연입니다~!
    아..멋집니다~!!!

  4. BlogIcon 풀칠아비 2011.06.01 13:19 신고

    플래시 몹의 정확한 뜻 이제서야 배우고 갑니다.
    대단하네요.
    행복한 6월 만들어 가세요.

  5. BlogIcon cfono1 2011.06.01 13:42 신고

    전 저 유명한 사람들 불러다 놓고 와 가만히 있나 했더니 저런걸 하려고 했던 거군요! 멋집니다~ ㅋ

  6. BlogIcon 프리티지지베 2011.06.01 14:00 신고

    저도..플래시몸이 뭔가, 뭔가 햇었는데
    꼬마낙타님의 자세한 설명 감사합니다.
    윌 아이엠.... 인터뷰..멋지네요`~^^;;

    꼬마낙타님 좋은 하루 되세요`~^_^

  7. BlogIcon 아하라한 2011.06.01 14:27 신고

    이야 정말 대단하다는 말 말고는 ^^
    크흑...노래는 자주 듣고 다니는데...가수이름을 몰랐다는 ㅠㅠ

  8. BlogIcon 화들짝 2011.06.01 15:10 신고

    오~~~ 일사불란한 움직임!
    따라서 같이 움직이면 무척 재미있을 것 같습니다.(동작은 미리 외워가는 것이겠죠! ^^)

  9. 와.. 정말 신기합니다..
    저도 참여하고 싶군요 완전 ㅎㅎ

  10. BlogIcon 쪼매맹 2011.06.01 16:33 신고

    와우.. 멋진 방법이네요.
    너무 좋아요. 오늘 첨알았네요~ ^^
    좋은정보 감사해요~

  11. BlogIcon 빛이드는창 2011.06.01 17:03 신고

    이렇게 많은 사람들이 참여한 플래시몹은 처음이네요^^
    정말 대단하다는 말 밖에 안나옵니다^^

  12. BlogIcon |노을| 2011.06.01 17:04 신고

    와... 대단하네요... +,.+

  13. BlogIcon 신기한별 2011.06.01 18:07 신고

    잘 보고 갑니다. 멋진 하루 보내세요~

  14. BlogIcon 울릉갈매기 2011.06.01 19:26 신고

    와우~
    저까지 빠져드는것 같아요~^^
    행복한 6월 되시길 바랍니다~^^

  15. BlogIcon 솜다리™ 2011.06.01 20:05 신고

    저도 첨 접해보내요...
    근데 대단한 관중이내요...^^

  16. BlogIcon pinksanho 2011.06.01 21:01 신고

    멋지네요 ㅎㅎ 저도 플래시몹 생소한 단어긴하네요 오늘 처음듣거든요 ㅎㅎ
    ㅜㅜㅜ 그래도. 그렇게 가져가믄 이래서 가져간다고 말이라도 좀 받았음 좋겠어요. 저는...
    그래도 플래시몹은 팬들이 열광적으로 함께 해주기까지 하는 행위이니.. 참 어떤 면에선 부럽기도해요.

  17. BlogIcon mami5 2011.06.01 22:05 신고

    와 동영상보니 정말 대단합니다..^^
    잘 보고가네요..
    꼬마낙타님 6월두 좋은 일 가득하세요..^^

  18. BlogIcon 머니탑 2011.06.01 23:26 신고

    오프라 윈프리에~ 블랙 아이드피스까지 대박이네욤~
    블랙 아이드피스 엄청좋아하는데 ㅋ
    좋은 영상 정말 잘보고 갑니다 ^^ 짱!

  19. BlogIcon B.C냥이 2011.06.02 23:33 신고

    제목과는 별개의 댓글이 되겠지만, 불법 다운로드에 대한 글이 있어서 댓글을 남겨요..
    음.. 제 생각은 조금 달라요. 아이돌들이 나와서 그런 말을 하는 까닭은, 불법 다운로드를 하는 연령층 중 청소년들에게 보다 큰 호소력을 지닐 수 있으니깐 그러는 거라고 생각해요. 그리고, 백지연님의 저 말씀에 전 전혀 동의를 못하겠어요.
    저 분은 방송인이고, 아나운서이니깐 음악을 만들어 본 적이 없으시겠죠. 저 또한 음악은 만들어 본 적이 없지만 한 곡을 만들기 위해서 작곡가나 작사가, 그리고 가수가 들인 노력을 생각한다면 저런 말은 못할꺼라고 생각합니다.
    누군가가 땀흘려서 만들어낸 것을 아무런 대가 없이 쓱~가져가서 듣는 것은 도둑질이나 다름 없습니다.

    • BlogIcon 파프리 꼬마낙타 2011.06.07 02:51 신고

      아..
      참고로 저 인터뷰는 백지연씨가 한 말이 아니라 백지연씨의 프로그램에 나온 윌 아이엠의 인터뷰 내용입니다. ^^;;

  20. BlogIcon 팬소년 2011.08.31 09:42 신고

    ㅋ.
    백지연씨한테 백지연씨가 운영하는 아나운서 학원 강의 모습 동영상, 강의 자료 전부 인터넷에 올려놓고 다운로드 수 올라갈 때마다 기뻐하라고 하고 싶네요.

    창작은 그냥 땅파서 하나요.
    당연한 댓가 받아야 합니다.

  21. 박뽝 2011.11.12 02:49 신고

    저 비됴는 저때한번보고 대단하다 생각했는데 진짜 규모가 ㅎㄷㄷ 하죵? ㅋ
    또보니 또 놀라네요 ㅋㅋ
    저는 윌아이엠말이 진짜 와다아요 정말 불법은 음악과 그 가수에 대한예의가 아니지만
    뭐랄까 윌아이엠말은 돈보다 음악적으로인정? 을 더 원한다고해야하나 이게 진정한 가수의 말아닌가요
    솔직히 불법다운로드라도 다운로드 한다는 자체는 그곡을 듣고싶어한다는거니까 가수로썬 기분좋은일이죠..;
    저도 그렇게 생각하는데 물론 불법은 잘못된거지만
    울나라 아이돌들은 왠지 돈돈돈돈 이러는거 같아서
    가장 이상적인건 불법하는사람이 자발적으로 아 이건 정말 내가 공짜로 듣기엔
    너무 아까운곡,미안한 곡이구나 이렇게 해서 앨범을 사거나 .. 영화나 이런거.. 이런게 가장 이상적인거 같아요
    울나라 아이돌이나 영화인들보면....... 굿다운로더는 좋은거지만... 특히 음악적으론 .. 애들이 .. 너무 상업적인거 가타서
    좀 그래보였어요.


1분동안 번개 두번 맞은 사람


흔히 로또를 번개 맞을 확률이라고 비유를 하지요.

번개를 두번 맞은 사람이 있다면 믿으시겠습니까?






믿으세요 ㅋㅋ

로또도 되는 사람이 있으니, 번개도 두번 맞는 사람이 있겠지요. 그것도 몇 걸음 못 가서 두방을.. 

더 놀라운 것은 두번 맞아도 효과가 없네요..

억세게 운 좋으신 분 같습니다. ㅎㄷㄷ..
  1. BlogIcon 솜다리™ 2011.05.09 01:09 신고

    세상에 이런일이...^^

  2. BlogIcon pennpenn 2011.05.09 06:34 신고

    이걸 본 아내가 이야기 하더군요
    정말 희안합니다
    징검다리 월요일을 기분 좋게 시작하세요~

  3. BlogIcon 리우군 2011.05.09 08:32 신고

    ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ 벼락을 두번이나 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

  4. BlogIcon e마루 2011.05.09 14:50 신고

    방심하고 보다가 혼자 빵~ 터졌습니다.^^ㅋ 즐거운 한주 되세요~~

  5. BlogIcon B.C냥이 2011.05.09 17:29 신고

    아, 저 이 기사 봤어요.
    운이 좋다고 해야 할지, 나쁘다고 해야 할지 모르겠지만....;;
    살아있으니 운이 좋다고 보는 것이 맞겠지요..^^;

  6. BlogIcon 이베이날다 2011.05.09 20:39 신고

    윽 ~~ 정말???? 가능한일 ???

    신기신기 ㅋㅋ

  7. BlogIcon HyunJun 2011.05.10 00:14 신고

    중국산 번개가 아닐런지...?!

  8. ㄹㄹ 2012.02.13 15:42 신고

    돌 속성 포켓몬

  9. BlogIcon Air Jordan 2013 2013.02.07 14:52 신고

    放送メディアを更新する必要があります更新が必要あなたのブラウザの最新版あるいは更新ご, http://www.newairjordans2013.us Jordans 2013.
    情報.

    ????韓国朝鮮中央放送局、中央テレビ放送を呼びかけ、キムジョンウン双方の共同の努力、実現する北朝鮮と韓国、韓国の共同宣言の決議後、

    緊張緩和.

    ????彼はまだ主張は農業の主要な任務と軽工業

    彼の経済政策.

    ????これはジョンウン氏の祖父、ジムリーダーの開国ジム金日成死んで1999年以来初めて北朝鮮指導者の話、トークの情報.



    ????北朝鮮の公式報道によると、キムジョンウンと彼の妻のコンサートに行きの形式は正月の始まり.



    ????「英国放送協会サイト一月一日の報道によると、北朝鮮指導者キムジョンウン今日は国家によってテレビやラジオ局発表新年トーク、唯一の軍事力を構築し、強大な国.



    ????キムジョンウン、防衛産業は精密な武器を作成.



    ????キムジョンウンと分裂を終瞭、統一し、必要な尊重と栄誉を抜け出す.」南北共同宣言」は二国間関係の発展は、早く統一を実現する

    の最も基本的な前提.
    ????キムジョンウン氏は、同友好の北朝鮮と世界各国との友好協力関係をさらに強化して、努力してこの地域の平和と安定の維持.



    ????北朝鮮の朝鮮中央テレビは、ジョンウン氏の記録は、新しい年、ジムから死後のジム金日成北朝鮮の最高指導者が初めてで

    新年の挨拶.
    履行共同声明.

    ????キムジョンウンとして分裂状態の終瞭を達成するために、対立統一国家、非常に重要な.尊重と栄誉の『南北共同宣言は南北関係、早く統一は実現の基本的な前提.



    ????この言葉を説明するには、北朝鮮と韓国の新大統領に当選可能金輝就任後、北朝鮮との関係を改善するので、7番です; 19韓国実行する共同声明と11番です; 9

    宣言.



    ????(『参考ニュース」の権限を、いかなる単位、個人ではなく、転載や使用)

  10. BlogIcon Manning Home nike Jersey 2013.02.25 17:47 신고

    Kemba Walker had 20 points, including four in overtime, as the Charlotte Bobcats won for just the second time in 21 games 108-101 over the Detroit Pistons on Sunday.

    Ben Gordon, http://www.eshopfalcons.com/ Falcons Matt Ryan Elite Jersey, traded to Charlotte during the offseason after three disappointing seasons with the Pistons, had 18 points in his return to The Palace. Ramon Sessions added 15 points and Bismack Biyombo contributed 10 points and 17 rebounds. Charlotte (9-24) forced 22 turnovers, which it converted into 26 points.

    Tayshaun Prince's 21 points led the Pistons (13-23), who had their four-game winning streak snapped. Greg Monroe had 18 points and 14 rebounds and Rodney Stuckey contributed 18 points for Detroit.

    The Bobcats are 3-1 in overtime games while the Pistons fell to 0-3.

    The score was 96-all going into overtime. Tyrus Thomas made a jumper on Charlotte's first overtime possession and Walker doubled the lead with a layup. Detroit finally broke through on Monroe's free throws with 2: 06 remaining.

    Thomas made another mid-range shot to nudge Charlotte's lead back to four. Walker's reverse layup with 1: 13 left made it 104-98.

    Stuckey's off-balance 3-pointer with 24. 4 seconds left sliced the Bobcats' lead in half but Michael Kidd-Gilchrist hit two free throws five seconds later. When Charlie Villanueva missed a 3-pointer on Detroit's next possession, the Bobcats' victory was secured.

    Sessions' layup with 9: 21 remaining in regulation gave the Bobcats an 85-84 lead. Andre Drummond then threw down two alley-oops from Will Bynum to put Detroit back on top. Gordon's 3-pointer with 3: 44 remaining tie it at 92-92.

    Monroe's driving layup was offset by two Gordon free throws. Prince made a jump hook with 2: 01 left for a 96-94 Detroit advantage. Neither team scored again until Walker‘s tying layup with 7. 8 seconds remaining.

    Stuckey tossed up a 3-point airball that went out of bounds with one second left and Gordon's desperation 3-point try also fell short.

    The Pistons scored a season-high 60 halftime points, yet led by only one at the break. Detroit's 64. 1 percent shooting was offset by its nine turnovers, leading to 16 Bobcats points, and Charlotte's 14-4 advantage in made free throws.

    Bobcats forward Hakim Warrick (flu-like symptoms) was a late scratch.

  11. BlogIcon Cutler Game Nike Jersey 2013.02.25 17:47 신고

    Nick Saban, the undisputed emperor of college football, has everything he could ever want in Tuscaloosa: Three national titles in four seasons; a great shot at another one a year from now; the best players; no static from anyone, including the browbeaten reporters who cover him; and the whole world kissing his feet.

    Thus it's no surprise that i think Saban, whose name has naturally come up in conversations among some NFL teams conducting coaching searches, should stay in Tuscaloosa.


    Nick Saban is dunked with Gatorade in the final seconds of the BCS title game win over Notre Dame. (AP)Yet there's another, far more compelling reason Saban should stick to the college game: He's too much of a hard ass — and too much of a lightweight — to survive in the big leagues.

    As with Crash Davis, he's far more suited to being the king of the minors.

    After coaching Alabama to a 42-14 victory in Monday night's BCS title game, Saban told reporters he's staying at the school, saying, "Maybe this is where I belong, and I'm really happy and at peace with that. "

    Then again, this is the same man who declared in December of 2006, "I guess I have to say it: I'm not going to be the Alabama coach. "

    Less than two weeks later, he left the Miami Dolphins to become the Alabama coach. So pardon me if i don't consider his word stronger than oak.

    This is not to say that i disagree with Saban's sensibilities: College football is where he belongs. When you are such an intractable, humorless control freak that you react to a team employee commenting benignly upon your haircut by issuing a decree that staffers outside of football operations can no longer speak to you in the hallways, as Saban apparently did during his two-year stint with the Dolphins, it's a clear-cut sign that professional football is not for you.

    [More: ESPN apologizes for announcer's fawning over AJ McCarron's girlfriend]

    Saban is the worst kind of bully, an autocrat so consumed with his power — and making the people under him feel that power, at every opportunity — that his ill-tempered insecurity supersedes all else. The lower level the employee, the higher the likelihood that Saban would pull a power trip. Yes, he was a wonderful boss.

    You can get away with that boorish behavior in a college town where everything revolves around the university's football program, and where you can lord your authority over players whose scholarships and NFL futures hang in the balance. Making dissent even less likely is the reality that the young men you coach cycle through the program every three-to-five years, and only have to be around you for a limited, NCAA-mandated number of hours per week.

    In the NFL, where up-front money and salary-cap concerns make certain players difficult to cut or trade and where veteran leadership is essential for locker-room stability, Saban's style is an impediment to sustained success.

    He also spent an inordinate amount of time obsessing over the media coverage of his team — and trying to control it. Alas, in the six years since he's been gone, the attention paid to the NFL has intensified immensely. Watching Saban try to control his players' Twitter accounts alone would be high comedy.


    Nick Saban argues with a head linesman while with the Dolphins in 2006, http://www.baltimoreravenstore.com/ Ravens Rice Jersey. (USA Today Sports Images) He is a good enough coach, especially on the defensive side of the ball, that he wasn't a complete disaster in Miami, going 15-17 before lying like John Edwards and fleeing like Saddam Hussein. As a leader, Saban was overmatched, and he knew it. And if the 61-year-old coach were to return to the NFL now, I believe he'd fail miserably. For one thing, his reputation would precede him in league circles — and that would not be a positive development.

    I was reminded of Saban's unpopular NFL past last Saturday while enjoying some Chinese food with Baltimore Ravens linebacker Brendon Ayanbadejo at a Towson, Md., restaurant. Ayanbadejo, a thoughtful veteran who has played for a healthy spectrum of head coaches during his 14-year professional career, recalled being summoned to Saban's office in 2005 after learning he'd been traded to the Chicago Bears.

    When Saban asked him if he had anything to say before he departed, Ayanbadejo replied, "You're a good coach. You should devote more time to coaching and less time to being a jerk. "

    Ayanbadejo recalled during our conversation many of the infamous incidents that occurred during Saban's tenure, some of which were documented adroitly by South Florida Sun Sentinel columnist Dave Hyde last Saturday.

    There was the time Saban stepped over a convulsing player, heat-stricken guard Jeno James, as he made his way through a narrow hallway, provoking a contentious team meeting. There were the frequent chewing-out sessions — of assistant coaches, team staffers and players — and the time when veteran linebacker Zach Thomas yelled back, becoming an even more revered figure in the facility.

    And there was even an anecdote, from Ayanbadejo, about Saban trying to intimidate veteran linebacker Junior Seau. Given my affection for the late, great and immensely popular future Hall of Famer — who, to his credit, laughed off Saban's attempt to keep him from practicing without cleats — you can guess how i felt about that incident.

    It's not as if I needed the refresher course from Ayanbadejo to form my opinion regarding Saban. Over the years I've spoken to enough players, assistant coaches and front-office executives who were with him in Miami to conclude that he was too consumed with trivial issues to run a successful, big-picture operation.

    I had a couple of other conversations on Tuesday with ex-Dolphins players who rekindled those warm and fuzzy memories. One story stood out: A couple of days into his first training camp with the team, Saban met with the Dolphins' 10-player leadership council, a group of influential veterans common to many NFL teams.

    [Related: Draft stock in question after subpar BCS performance by Manti Te'o]

    The players told Saban that they agreed with his demanding approach to practice, that they welcomed the hard work and the insistence that they go the extra mile. They had just one request: During the five-minute warm-up period at the start of practice, as they stretched amid the South Florida heat and humidity, they preferred to remove their helmets.

    Saban nodded and told them he understood their rationale. Though he didn't specifically grant it, he gave the distinct impression that helmets would no longer be required during warm-ups.

    Recalled one player who was on the council: "The next morning, Junior Seau started stretching without a helmet, and Saban jumped him: 'What the [expletive] are you doing with your helmet off? We wear helmets at practice! ' After that, the whole leadership-council thing was kind of a joke. "


    Nick Saban hoists his fourth college national championship trophy. (AP) This is not to suggest that strict, demanding coaches are incapable of winning big in the NFL. The Lombardi Trophy is named after a no-nonsense authoritarian, and the current coach who has collected three of those — Saban's good buddy Bill Belichick — isn't exactly known for his peppy, egalitarian leadership style.

    That said, Belichick is more adaptable and cognizant of what's truly important than Saban. He learned from his first NFL coaching experience, a frustrating four-year stint with the Cleveland Browns, and developed a keener sense of when to put his foot down (or into an employee's nether region) and when to ease off the gas pedal.

    As so many of Belichick's failed disciples have learned the hard way — yes, Josh McDaniels, Eric Mangini and Scott Pioli, I'm talking to you — that emulating the master's nuanced approach to running a franchise isn't easy. Belichick can be crass, and he tends not to take any crap, but a whole lot of respected veterans (including Seau, for what it's worth) have truly enjoyed playing for the Patriots during his tenure.

    Similarly, Tom Coughlin eased back on his dictatorial sensibilities before guiding the Giants to a pair of Super Bowl titles. He's still far from mellow, but he commands far more respect within his organization than Saban ever did with the Dolphins.

    I'm sure that Saban, given his competitive instincts, has fantasies about returning to the pros and showing that he can be a champion on the big stage. That's understandable, but it's only a fantasy.

  12. For the second year in a row, Chip Kelly flirted with becoming an NFL head coach, but is returning to Oregon.

    According to ESPN’s Adam Schefter, Kelly considered becoming the Eagles’ next head coach, but decided to return to Oregon.

    On Friday, http://www.eshopfalcons.com/ Falcons Matt Ryan Jersey, NFL.com reported that Kelly was close to becoming the Browns’ next coach. Kelly then reportedly had a long interview with the Eagles on Saturday. He also met with the Bills.

    On Sunday, the Browns “walked away” from Kelly because they weren’t certain he was 100 percent committed to leaving Oregon, according to Mary Kay Cabot of the Cleveland Plain Dealer.

    Kelly is 46-7 as Oregon’s coach, including a Fiesta Bowl win last Thursday. Last year, Kelly almost became the Buccaneers’ head coach before deciding to stay in the college ranks.


깨지 말라고 만든 게임, 또 그걸 깨는 사람


여러분은 게임을 좋아하시나요? 게임은 적절한 난이도로 즐기게 되면 목표 달성의 성취감과 스트레스 해소에 도움이 됩니다. 하지만 사람이라는게 한번 익숙해지면 더 높은 난이도의 게임을 원하게 되지요. 그래서 몇몇 게임들은 난이도가 극악에 이를 정도로 어렵습니다.

이번에 소개해드릴 동영상은 정말 깨지 말라고 만든 게임과 그걸 또 깨는 사람의 플레이 동영상입니다. 조작이 아닌가 생각이 들 정도로 정교한 컨트롤을 보여주는데요. 게임은 그 유명한 수퍼마리오입니다.




계속 보면서 입이 안 다물어지네요.

대단한 플레이입니다. 저걸 라이브로 뒤에서 지켜보고 있으면 어떤 기분일까요? 참.. 상상이 안가네요. ㅎ



  1. 이전 댓글 더보기
  2. BlogIcon 모아디 2011.05.03 17:32 신고

    예전에 수퍼마리오3 동영상 본적이 있었는데.. 이것 역시 대단하네요. 무한 별을 먹어도 클리어하기 힘들듯 ㅋ

  3. BlogIcon 빛이드는창 2011.05.03 18:16 신고

    와... 진짜.. 겜신들은..엄청나는 듯..싶네요^^

  4. BlogIcon |노을| 2011.05.03 18:22 신고

    와~ 정말 대단한데요..;;
    동전도 딱~! 100개 맞춰서 먹네요.. ㅡㅡ;;

  5. BlogIcon 이베이날다 2011.05.03 19:45 신고

    정말 극악의 난이도네여 ㅠ.ㅠ

    정말 손이 감각적으로 움직이는 것 같네요 ~~

  6. BlogIcon 쪼매맹 2011.05.03 19:59 신고

    역시 사람이 못하는게 없네요.와우..

  7. BlogIcon 울릉갈매기 2011.05.03 20:23 신고

    ㅎㅎㅎ
    정말 저는 근처에도 못가겠어요~^^
    행복한 시간 되세요~^^

  8. BlogIcon 솜다리™ 2011.05.03 20:57 신고

    게임은 별로 좋아라하지 않아 이 게임 한번도 않해봤지만..
    이건 장난이 아니내요^^

  9. BlogIcon pinksanho 2011.05.03 21:04 신고

    헉ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ. 대단한데요 -_-; 전짜 신컨.......ㅋㅋㅋ
    ㅋㅋㅋㅋ... 어떻게 하면 할 수 있을지;;;;;;느려도 죽을때 되면 죽는 저로서는...

  10. BlogIcon 해우기 2011.05.03 21:04 신고

    다리가 이 모양이 되고나니...
    좀 심심해서...
    같이 운동하는 사람들 운동하는 인조잔디에 누워서 구경만 하다가...

    들어와서 게임을 좀 해볼까했더니...영 적성에...

    그래서 독서를 해볼까...하고 찾고있었는데....
    다시 한번 누구 스마트폰빌려서 게임을 해보고 싶어지네요 ㅎㅎ

  11. BlogIcon 신기한별 2011.05.03 22:45 신고

    재미있는 영상 잘 보고 갑니다.

  12. BlogIcon 소셜윈 2011.05.03 23:22 신고

    아~~ 좀 보려고 했는데 버퍼링이 너무 심해서
    못 보겠어요 ㅜㅜ

  13. BlogIcon B.C냥이 2011.05.04 00:32 신고

    @_@....보다가 눈이 뱅글뱅글 도는 바람에 어지러워서 중도 포기했습니다;;;
    3분 30초 조금 넘게까지 봤는데..... 저거 깰라고 얼마나 많이 플레이했을지 생각하면.. 허어어;;;;

    중간고사 잘 보시고 멋진 리뷰 보여주시기를 기대하겠습니다 : )

  14. BlogIcon 지후니74 2011.05.04 08:04 신고

    정말 경의롭기까지 합니다.~~~ ^^
    수 많은 실패와 좌절(?)을 겪고 얻은 결과겠지요?

  15. BlogIcon Teo테오 2011.05.04 11:12 신고

    정말 대박이네요... 어떻게 저럴수가 있죠 ㅋㅋㅋ

  16. BlogIcon 이바구™ 2011.05.04 13:18 신고

    정말 신의 경지네요.^^

  17. BlogIcon 하늘날아 2011.05.04 13:39 신고

    게임도 대단하지만
    만들어 낸 사람, 그것을 하는 사람은 더 대단하네요
    저런 경지가 되려면 도데체 어떻게 얼마만큼 해야할까요 ㅋㅋㅋㅋ
    행복한 하루 되세요^^

  18. BlogIcon 그냥 아저씨 2011.05.04 17:31 신고

    뒤에서; 지켜 보면 다리 아픕니다;;
    오락실이면; 참;; 인내가 바닥이 나는 상황이지요;;;

  19. BlogIcon 쿠쿠양 2011.05.05 00:40 신고

    이런걸 보고 뛰는 놈 위에 나는 놈 있다고 하는걸까요?+__+

  20. BlogIcon 레종 Raison. 2011.05.06 21:36 신고

    후덜덜 하네요..... 짱입니다..

  21. BlogIcon 新利线上娱乐城 2013.07.25 17:16 신고

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      无法成行的世锦赛之旅

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      法新社的评论一针见血:“阿姆斯特朗事件爆发后,环法成为众矢之的。如今第100届环法正在进行,还没有出现兴奋剂丑闻,反倒是田径接过了这丑恶的时尚。”

      如投掷在泥淖中的巨石,“禁药风波”带来的涟漪效应总比它本身的能量要大许多。

      拿盖伊来说,这位老将今年实现了状态复苏,以9秒75创造了今年男子百米世界最好成绩,而且,今年前三个百米最好成绩都是他制造。其实,从2007年世锦赛独得3枚金牌后,盖伊就一直被伤病困扰,2011年的臀部手术让他错过了近1年的比赛,伦敦奥运会上同样无一收获。但和禁药产生联系后,让这一切赞美都变得毫无意义。

      田径公信力遭受严峻挑战

      但兴奋剂的研制永远领先反兴奋剂,这也说明巴尔科实验室的魔影从来没有消散。“人们对雅典奥运会前的‘巴尔科事件’记忆犹新,”《芝加哥论坛报》称,“当时,他们帮助琼斯、雅各布斯、蒙哥马利、盖恩斯、科林斯和哈里森6位田径名将服用类固醇,他们在奥运会前被禁赛。如今,田径运动遭遇又一个重大危机,没有比现在更糟糕的局面了,除非博尔特也被查出服用禁药。”“我不能代表其他人说什么,但是我是干净的,在兴奋剂问题上我没有任何问题。”6月,博尔特曾在巴黎钻石联赛上自证清白。但这个情景是现实,也是讽喻,在盖伊和鲍威尔等人集体陷入丑闻后,恐怕每一位短跑明星都要面临禁药的质疑,何况,巴尔科创始人孔特还曾质疑过博尔特成绩的真实性。


흑인들을 보면 노래 정말 잘하죠. 뭐 노래 뿐만아니라 잘 하는게 너무나도 많은데요..
흑인들이 노래 잘하는 이유 중에 하나가 아닐까 생각되는 영상을 찾았습니다.






ㅋㅋㅋ

알파벳 배우는 노래부터 남다르네요..
패티 아주머니의 엄청난 파워를 느낄 수 있는 영상이 이 ABC 송 말고도 있죠.





머라이어캐리와 콘서트에서 듀엣 했던 영상입니다.
머라이어캐리가 최고인줄 알았는데, 다른 분들도 많네요. ( 팝의 역사를 배워 보고 싶은 욕구가 충만해지는데요? )






파워가 느껴지네요..
머라이어캐리와는 다른 어떤 느낌입니다. ㅎ

역시 노래는 편식하지 말고 들어야 되는 것 같습니다.


  1. BlogIcon 블로군 2010.09.01 13:25 신고

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    12、一妇女带吃奶的孩子到餐厅就餐,这是孩子哭闹,女人赶紧撩起衣服,服务生过来制止,妇女大怒:难道这也不行吗?服务生答:露胸可以,但是不能自带饮料.

    13、某男生给同班某友生取外号,叫胖猪,女生向老师哭诉,老师答应对该男生批评,第二天教师在班上讲:“某男生太没礼貌,随便给别人起外号,总不能别人象啥就叫啥吧?”

    14、葛优吃饭途中上厕所,回来后裤子湿了,朋友:裤子怎么湿了?葛优:经常!朋友不解,葛优:经常是旁边的人撒着尿突然转过来大叫:我靠!这不是葛优吗?!

    15、蜈蚣被蛇咬了,为防毒液扩散必须截肢!蜈蚣想:幸亏偶腿多~!!大夫安慰道:兄弟,想开点,你以后就是蚯蚓了~

    16、鱼说:我时时刻刻睁开眼睛,就是为了能让你永远在我眼中~
    水说:我时时刻刻流淌不息,就是为了能永远把你拥抱~~
    锅说:都他妈快熟了,还这么贫!!

    17、鱼又说了:
    有卖耗子药滴不~~~
    爷也自尽!!!~~
    谁也别想吃了爷!!!~~~
    爷比鸡还TMD不好惹~~~ !!!
    偶让嫩连汤都喝不了!!!!!~锅都得仍~~~~~

    18、一只漂亮的小猪
    脖子上挂着蝴蝶结
    屁颠屁颠的跑到你面前
    用崇拜的眼光看着你
    摇摇尾巴
    甩甩屁股
    对你唱了一首:
    长大后我就成了你!

    19、男人九怕:一怕情人怀孕,二怕二奶转正,三怕小姐有病,四怕媳妇拼命,五怕情人被撬,六怕老婆被泡,七怕财产被盗,八怕群众上告,九怕干完还要.

    20、天是蓝的,海是深的,男人的话没一句是真的;
    爱是永恒的,血是鲜红的,男人不打是不行的;
    男人如果是有钱的,和谁都是有缘的;
    男人靠得住,猪都会爬树!!

    21、听着!
    我要追你!
    我就认定你了!
    我一直以来要找的就是你了!
    这次机会我绝对会好好把握的!
    我一定要追到你为止!
    死苍蝇!
    我拍死你!!

    22、想你的头
    想你的嘴
    想你想得流口水
    爱你的皮
    爱你的背
    爱你的脖子和大腿
    爱你的肝爱你的肺
    爱你的身体和香味
    我永远爱你
    哦。。。
    北京烤鸭

    23、跟我妈说了,我喜欢你,我要让你去我家,日日夜夜陪伴我,知道吗?通过这些日子的交往,我发现我已经不能没有你,可我妈不肯,她说:家里不准养猪!

    24、我轻轻地把你吻倒在床上
    轻轻地拉开你的裤子
    轻轻地脱掉你的内裤
    轻轻地吻你的脸庞
    然后轻轻地对你说:
    宝贝换个姿势。。。
    ……
    ……
    ……
    ……
    ……
    ……
    ……
    ……
    ……
    该换尿布了

    25、你的人生写照:
    十岁学会自己洗澡——猪自清;
    二十岁光彩照人——猪时茂;
    三十岁找到工作——猪立业;
    四十岁雇了仆人——猪得佣;
    五十岁学会了打篮球——猪投。

    26、漫漫人生路,谁不错几步,家里要保住,情人还得处:家里有个做饭的,单位留个好看的,外面养个可爱的,远方有个想念的,保住二,守住一,发展三四五六七!

    27、中美俄三国首脑去打猎,被一群恶狼包围,布什给美元,普京给美女,狼放了他们,老*把仅有的党证拿出来,狼全部跪下,声泪俱下道:终于找到组织了!

    28、听说了吗?前生的5000次回眸才换来今生的擦肩而过,今生象我们这样的好朋友,前生。。。。什么都没干,光他妈的回头了。

    29、想念你的微笑
    回味你的味道
    脱掉你的外套
    露出你的美妙
    控制我的心跳
    压抑我的狂躁
    想想我的需要
    还是早点把你
    干掉。。。

    啊!粽子!
    端午节快乐!

    29、大哥大与子母机结婚生下小灵通,小灵通面目可憎,信号奇差,又不能漫游,不能互发短信,伤心欲绝,经DNA检测,才发现其亲爹不是大哥大,是对讲机~

    30、什么是骄傲?牛呗!
    什么是谦虚?装呗!
    什么是勤俭?抠呗!
    什么是奉贤?傻呗!
    什么是聪明?吹呗!
    什么美女?你呗!

    31、有两个人去打猎,突然看见只老虎,俩人撒腿就跑,跑到半截一个人说:哥们,我不行了,别跑了,咱跟老虎死磕吧!对曰:别操蛋了,我跑不过老虎我还跑不过你?~!

    32、一对夫妻来到一口许愿井旁,丈夫弯腰,许个愿还往井里扔个硬币,妻子也想许愿,但她弯腰时不小心翻入井里,丈夫惊呆了,然后狂笑自语道:真他妈的灵啊~!!

    33、你在哪?电话打不通,急死我了,我有重要的事找你,看到信息马上到防疫站体检,最快速度!你机会来拉~体检合格,你将能从私人猪圈调到国营猪场了~

    34、你是多愁善感的乌鸦,
    你是活蹦乱跳的青蛙,
    你是出淤泥而不染的地瓜,
    你是我心中火红火红的大虾~
    我想轻轻的问候你:看我短信的可爱的傻瓜,你现在好吗?

    35、大象把粪便排在了路中央,一只蚂蚁正好路过,它抬头望了望那云雾缭绕的顶峰,不禁感叹道:呀啦唆,这就是青藏高原~~

    36、你都老大不小了,有些事该让你知道了!天,是用来刮风的;地,是用来长草的;我,是用来证明人类伟大的;你,就是用来炖粉条的~~

    37、今夜星光灿烂,你在哪里浪漫,没事可别乱跑,也别到处放电,我知你已成年,爱慕之心难免,但以你的条件,不能那么随便,你是纯种狼犬,别和笨狗相恋~~

    38、飞机上,乌鸦对乘务员说:给爷来杯水!猪听后也学道:给爷也来杯水!乘务员把猪和乌鸦扔出机舱,乌鸦笑着对猪说:傻了吧?爷会飞~~!

    39、最近老是想你,我知道这样不好,但我控制不了自己,不把心里的话告诉你我会后悔一辈子,不管你的决定如何,我都要鼓足勇气问你:那两毛钱啥还我?~

    40、黑猩猩不小心踩了长臂猿拉的大便,长臂猿温柔细心地帮她擦洗干净后他们相爱了,别人问起他们是怎么走到一起的,黑猩猩感慨地说:猿粪!都是猿粪那!~~

    41、八戒正在月球上搂着嫦娥献媚,忽见一人藏在铁罐里从眼前飞过,嫦娥惊呼:有人偷看我们隐私!八戒问:是高老庄派来的吗?嫦娥答:还好,是杨利伟~

    42、知识竞赛主持人问:猫是否会爬树?老鹰抢答:会!主持人:举例说明!老鹰含泪道:那年,我睡熟了,猫爬上树。。。。后来就有了猫头鹰。。

    43、大黑熊将一个蜂窝放到水里,想把蜂窝里的小蜜蜂泡出来。谁知道蜂群出来后就追得大黑熊满世界乱跑。熊太太见状大骂:就你哪个笨熊样,还敢泡小蜜??

    44、很久很久以前,在一个风雪交加的夜晚,一个老爷爷勇敢的在雪地上小便,结果冻掉了小鸡鸡,为了纪念他,从此人们叫他“剩蛋老人”提前祝你:圣诞快乐!

    45、好久没你的消息了
    这两天总想你
    心里很乱
    寻遍你爱去的池塘
    就餐的小屋
    睡觉的草坪
    你不见你的踪影
    心都快碎了
    养这么大的猪咋就丢了呢?

    46、亲爱的上帝,请保佑那些不打电话给我,也不发短信给我,更没有想念我的那个人,让他的手机掉到厕所里——阿门!!

    47、夜,已经很深了,
    我从睡梦中醒来
    因为我想起了你
    为什么你总是在深夜的时候悄然离我而去
    我真的很需要你

    枕头又掉哪儿去了?

    48、一天,老鼠羞嗒嗒地对大象说:"我怀了你的孩子!"


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    仔仔被爸爸修理了,他跑去找妈妈诉苦:“妈妈,有人打你儿子你会怎样?”妈妈:“我会打他的儿子报仇!”仔仔:“……”

    舞会上某男对刚认识的女孩说:舞会后让我送你回去好吗?我保证绝对不会摸你、亲你,我一定会保持绅士的风度。女孩愤怒的说:那你还是

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63빌딩 해킹 동영상과 기숙사 조명쇼




어두워진 밤에 아파트나 오피스텔 같은 건물들을 보고 있으면, 하나씩 집에 불이 들어오는 것을 볼 수 있습니다.
가끔 그런 걸 지켜보면서 아파트 불로 글씨를 쓴다면 멋지지 않을까?? 라는 생각을 하게 됩니다.
 아파트의 방 하나 하나가 하나의 픽셀이 되어서 그림을 그리거나 글씨를 쓰는 것이죠.

비슷한 생각을 하는 사람이 많은가 봅니다.
인터넷에 "기숙사 조명쇼"라는 제목으로 돌아다니는 영상이 있어 소개해 드리고자 합니다.




저걸 손으로 했을리는 없고, 아마 중앙 전기실에서 저런 영상을 출력하는 프로그램을 돌린듯 하네요.
어찌됐건 장관이네요 ㅎㅎ




비슷한 영상으로 63빌딩을 해킹했다는 "63빌딩 해킹" 동영상이 있어서 소개해 드리겠습니다.
결국 이 영상은 한 회사에서 지원한 이벤트성 영상으로 실제 영상이 아닌것으로 밝혀졌습니다.
그래도 상상력은 대단하네요. 63빌딩을 가지고 놀 생각을 ㅎㅎ

양해를 얻어서 저런 걸로 프로포즈를 해도 멋지겠는데요? ㅎㅎ


  1. ㅋㅋㅋ 2011.03.02 18:07 신고

    저희아버지가 저기 시설관리팀장이신데 저런일을당하실리가없죵


자를 이용해서 캐논 변주곡 연주하기



세상에는 많은 악기들이 있습니다.
줄을 켜서 진동을 만들어 소리를 내는 현악기가 있고, 관을 울려서 소리를 내는 관악기가 있으며, 건반을 눌러서 소리를 내는 건반악기, 목소리를 이용한 성악도 있습니다.

하지만 원래는 악기로 만들어지지 않은 것들을 이용한 연주가 많이 있습니다.
그런 종류의 연주로는 난타가 가장 유명하겠네요.

오늘 소개해 드릴 연주는 문방구에서 쉽게 살 수 있는 자를 이용한 연주입니다.




자를 튕기면 소리가 나는 건 학교 다닐때 누구나 해 본 일이지만, 정확한 음을 집어 내서 연주까지 하네요.
연습을 얼마나 했을까요 ㅎㅎ 대단합니다.

이걸 보니까 길거리에서 페인트 통 뒤집어 놓고 드럽치는 흑형 영상이 생각나네요..



여튼 대단한 사람 많습니다. ㅋㅋ


  1. BlogIcon LiveREX 2010.08.19 16:44 신고

    오~ 신기한데요? ^^

  2. khyunhe 2010.08.29 11:50 신고

    스타킹이나 세상에 이런일이에 나가면 대박이나겠는데요!

  3. ijy 2010.09.07 19:11 신고

    우와 , , 편집같이 잘하넴. .

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      但比起云南楚雄某农村的“一人超生,全村结扎!”就算不了什么了。
      山东的国道上有条绝对经典:“一人结扎,全家光荣”,眼前仿佛浮现出一幕:放鞭炮、骑大马、戴红花,逢人便趾高气昂地宣布:“俺结扎啦!快来俺家喝酒吧!”。
      四川某乡路边的农舍上用白漆刷着:“该扎不扎,见了就抓。”
      某地倒有点重女轻男:“女扎要得病,男扎还能行!”
      在浙源至理坑的路上一小村庄:“国家兴旺,匹夫有责;计划生育,丈夫有责。”这说明那里的主要障碍在男方。
      在江西婺原见到的:“见证怀孕,持证生育!”
      山东某农村计划生育口号:“能引的引出来,能流的流出来,坚决不能生下来。”旁边还有一条:“普及一胎,控制二胎,消灭三胎。”
      山东菏泽的计划生育:“宁可家破,不可国亡。”
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      某地估计计划生育阻力较大,有关部门便刷了条标语:“喝药不夺瓶,上吊就给绳。”
      湖北阳新地区的计划生育标语也很形象很彪悍:“通不通,三分钟;再不通,龙卷风。”
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      贵州倒是婉转温柔:“朋友,你计划生育了吗?”
      北京某远郊区:“少生孩子多种树,少生孩子多养猪。”
      在山西看到的版本是:“山区人民要想富,少生孩子多种树。”
      最绝的是东三省版本:“农村想不穷,少生孩子养狗熊。”
      湖南某乡政府:“结贫穷的扎,上致富的环。”
      湖北某火葬场门口:“经济搞上去,人口降下来。”
      我们不得不说到法制,有不少也让人哭笑不得:
      在河北看到一条标语:“武装抗税是非法行为。”它意思似乎是说,和平抗税是合法的。
      汪口的一面墙上张牙舞爪用红色油漆写着几个飘逸大字:“谁烧山,谁坐牢。”
      这是在贵州的施秉看到的,也挺经典的:“放火烧山,牢底坐穿。”
      在河南永城看到一标语:“不怕死的就到十八里乡来作案。”够直白!
      安徽亳州向南的公路上一条标语:“私设路障违法,拦路抢劫判刑。”
      在铁路上看到的:“横卧铁轨,不死也要负上法律责任。”真是经典。
      某电厂门口大红字标语更绝:“严禁触摸电线,5万伏高压,一触即死,违者法办。”
      在河南的国道上看见的超劲爆的一条:“抢劫警车是违法的!“类似的还有“不得袭击警车!。”
      十年前过湖南衡阳,车窗外闪过如下标语:“坚决打击挑脚筋。”看得人浑身发毛,不寒而栗。
      有条保护光缆的:“偷割光缆,讨死。”
      江西某地就似乎没有这么粗俗:“光缆无铜,偷盗有罪。”
      在山东看到的标语:“光缆不含铜,偷盗要判刑。”
      有个最最消极的:“光纤没铜,偷也没用。”没有铜,大概也应该有点别的什么金属,也能卖钱,真是爆笑至极!
      在浙江一座尼姑庵的墙外,写着:“偷税漏税,来世罚作尼姑。”姑且不说对出家人的侮辱,至少我看到尼姑,就觉得她们身上都藏着前世带来的钱财。
      再来看看其他的吧,其实,一些看似平常的标语也容易产生“笑”果:
      安徽,归还农业贷款的标语:“人死债不烂,父债子来还。”
      去黑龙江,估计当地招商引资有困难,看到:“谁侵犯投资者,谁就是人民的罪人。”
      证券公司标语:“教育投资者!”
      河北某地:“不娶文盲妻,不嫁文盲汉!”
      普及义务教育:“养女不读书,不如养头猪!养儿不读书,就象养头驴!”
      贵州铜仁,在去梵净山的路上一个屠宰场的标语:“以三个代表指导我们的屠宰工作。”
      厦门鼓浪屿附近招揽至金门之观光码头旁:“违法越界观光,小心枪弹扫光。”
      农村信用社:“农村信用社是老百性生活的贴心人。”
      山东省济宁市至汶上县公路旁某乡镇巨型横幅:“集体***违法、越级***可耻。”愚民已到了令人发指的地步。
      某校:“热烈欢迎人大代表来我校明察暗访。”
      山东日照市大标语:“热烈欢迎全国某某系统领导来日。”
      更绝的是重庆人和镇一配种场的标语:人和良种猪配种场。
      贫困县的基层班干部标语:“我们的工作重点是管好两个口,填上面的口,堵下面的口”
      某地领导的口号是:“你们要淡薄名利,要加强廉政建设。”
      重庆巫山县路口:“外地车辆在巫山境内一般不被处罚。”
      国人对“要致富,快修路。“应该耳熟能详,但在河南某铁路沿线被人改得极其反动“要致富,偷铁路!”
      单位司机班门口:“马达一响,集中思想,车轮一动,想到群众。”
      上海浦东新区浦东大道两侧的旗帜:“垃圾分类,从我做起。”自己倒先成垃圾了!
      动物园标语:“保护野生动物就是保护我们自己。”成动物总比成垃圾好。
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      路边小店:“吃饭补胎。”
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      除了这些奇怪的口号,那些我们司空见惯的标语,倘若细想起来,也往往问题甚多:
      建筑工地上常见这样的标语:“大干**天,工程提前完。”不知道非要把有严格施工标准的工程提前“完”的这个“完”是“完成”呢, http://www.nbabgstore.com/ Spurs Gary Neal Men's Jersey?还是“完蛋。”
      比如十字路口写着:“红灯时请您停车。”,但我想假如一个人连红灯都不在意的话,这个口号他更是不屑一顾了。
      公共厕所里写着:“请您便溺入池。”我不懂一个人即然已经花钱进了公共厕所,为什么还要在里面随地便溺。
      倒是一所大学的厕所里一条外国留学生写的标语让我觉得格外触目:“中国同学,请你便后冲水。”
      大家以后出门旅行路上尽可留心些,可以收集到更多精彩的标语。说不定日后历史学家编写《中国标语史》的时候便也能勉强占个一席之地。++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
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[신기한 동영상] 헐리우드 제작진 3명이 모이면...


CG 산업이 발전을 안 할래야 안 할 수가 없겠네요.




컴퓨터 그래픽은 실제로 촬영하기 어려운 장면들을 컴퓨터를 통해서 제작, 합성을 하여 실제처럼 보이도록 만드는 것입니다.
위 영상에서도 3명이 여러번 해변을 뛰어 다니는 것을 컴퓨터로 합성해서 여러명의 병사들이 해안으로 상륙하는 장면을 만들어 냈죠.
또 초록색 막을 이용해서 등장인물의 배경을 합성하기도 합니다.
평범한 언덕이 아찔한 절벽이 되기도 하는 것이 바로 그것입니다.

이런 컴퓨터 그래픽을 이용하면 인간이 상상할 수 있는 장면의 대부분을 화면으로 실체화 시킬 수 있기 때문에 영화에서 많이 쓰입니다.





국내 영화 중 CG가 돋보였던 "디워의 CG 작업 과정을 보여주는 영상입니다.

우리나라의 CG 산업이 점점 성장해서 이제 세계적으로도 뒤떨어지지 않는 수준을 보이고 있는데요.

국내 CG 애니메이션 해외 '호평' - 디지털 타임스
인터파크, "헐리우드 간다.. M&A로 국내 최대 CG사 출범 - 소비자가 만드는 신문

앞으로 한국에서도 이런 동영상을 만들어서 유튜브 같은 동영상 공유 사이트로 퍼트려서 홍보를 했으면 좋겠네요.
신기합니다. "반지의 제왕" 시리즈에서도 많은 부분이 CG로 제작이 되었는데요. ( 대규모 전투신, 오크, 골룸 등 ) 동영상을 퍼오지 못 해 아쉽기만 합니다. ㅎㅎ



세상에서 가장 짜릿한 해수욕장



세상에서 가장 짜릿한 해수욕장은 어디 일까요? 미녀들이 많은 곳? 상어들이 우글거리는 곳?
글쎄요. 제가 생각하기에 가장 짜릿한 해수욕장은 바로 여기입니다.

Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close
Extremely Loud and Incredibly Close by matt.hintsa 저작자 표시비영리변경 금지


비행기가 크게 보이는 곳은 우리나라에도 몇 군데 있지만 이렇게 바로 위를 날아 다니는 곳은 이곳 밖에 없을 겁니다.
이곳을 모르는 분은 합성이라고 말을 할 텐데요.
실제로 존재하는 곳입니다.

St. Martin/ St. Maarten Island
St. Martin/ St. Maarten Island by michael feagans 저작자 표시비영리동일조건 변경허락

프린세스 줄리아나 국제공항인데요.
이 공항은 Netherland Antille 라는 섬에 있는 공항입니다.
정확한 이름은 St Maarten, princess juliana 라고 하네요.

Don't Go in the Water...
Don't Go in the Water... by matt.hintsa 저작자 표시비영리변경 금지


해수욕을 하다가 하늘을 쳐다보면 마치 커다란 비행기가 여러분을 향해 돌진해 오는 듯한 착각을 불러 일으킬 수 있는데요.
정말 짜릿한 휴가가 되지 않을까 싶네요.


SXM
SXM by matt.hintsa 저작자 표시비영리변경 금지


아마 이 사진들이 플리커를 비롯한 인터넷 공간으로 퍼지면서
이 섬의 관광객들이 증가 햇을 꺼라고 생각이 되네요.

푸르른 바다와 함께 푸르른 하늘, 그리고 나에게 달려오는 비행기
더위를 한방에 날려줄 삼종세트가 우리를 기다리고 있습니다.


Picture Perfect Approach
Picture Perfect Approach by matt.hintsa 저작자 표시비영리변경 금지

합성이 아니라는 것을 증명하기 위해서 동영상을 살짝 퍼오겠습니다.
세상에서 가장 짜릿한 해수욕장입니다.









이 섬은 미국 밑의 카리브해와 대서양이 접하는 곳에 있습니다.
섬이 작기 때문에 이런 구조의 공항은 불가피 했던것 같습니다.
공항 활주로 한쪽 끝에 해수욕장이 있다니 참 신기하네요.



지도를 확대해서 보면,




저 부분이 사진과 동영상에 나온 부분 같습니다.
늦었지만 이번 휴가는 저 곳으로 떠나보는 것도 좋겠네요. ㅎㅎ
근데 저기도 멕시코 기름 유출 사고의 영향을 받았을라나....



  1. BlogIcon 블로군 2010.08.02 10:37 신고

    우어....영화같은 곳이네요...ㅎㅎ
    멋있네요..소음을 제외하구요..ㅎㅎ^^a

  2. BlogIcon Desert Rose 2010.10.16 18:14 신고

    멋진데요..
    정말 블로박스타 영화의 주인공 같은 느낌이 들겠어요..
    ㅋㅋ

    그런데 근처 호텔에 묶는 사람들은 소음에 괜찮을까요??

  3. BlogIcon 스노리 2010.10.20 21:34 신고

    감사합니다~

  4. BlogIcon 씨발새꺄 2016.09.14 10:22 신고

    우어....애니메이션같은 곳이네요...ㅎㅎ
    멋있네요..소음을 제외하구요..ㅎㅎ^^6


못 박기의 일인자 - 망치질 마스터



일상생활을 하면서 못을 박아야 하는 일이 간혹 있는데요.
많은 분들이 조준을 잘 못해서 손을 다치거나 비스듬하게 못이 박히곤 합니다.
하지만 그런 정상적인 못 질을 뛰어 넘어 신기에 가까운 못 질을 하는 분이 있어서 소개해 드리려고 합니다.





시작은 망치 3개로 저글링을 하면서 시작을 하는데 점점 높게 던지더니 천장에 박혀있는 못을 박아 버립니다.
그리고 마지막으로 세개의 망치를 던져서 나무에 박아버리네요.

인간의 능력은 참 대단한 것 같습니다.
저 분도 망치질을 오랜 기간 동안 해서 저런 능력을 갖게 되었을 테죠.
  1. BlogIcon 블로군 2010.08.02 10:36 신고

    헐~~~~~~~~
    정말 헐~~~
    대단하다 못해 저게 가능하긴 해요??ㅎㅎㅎ

    뭐 저런...헐....

  2. 오종원 2010.10.05 03:49 신고

    군대가면 사랑 받는 스킬이겠군요 저런거나 연습해서 갔다올껄
    망치질과 눈요기를 한번에 장기자랑 나가서 특박이라도 받을...ㅋㅋ


계란 폭탄 - 전자레인지 주의 음식

전자레인지는 제대로 사용하면 참 편리한 가전 제품이지만 주의 사항을 제대로 알지 못 하고, 전자레인지에 돌리면 안 되는 것들을 전자레인지에 넣고 작동을 시키면 위험하게 변할 수도 있습니다.

그 중에 정말 너무나도 친근한 먹거리인 삶은 계란을 전자레인지에 돌리면 폭탄처럼 폭발 할 수도 있다는 점을 꼭 기억하시기 바랍니다. 삶은 계란이 순식간에 계란 폭탄이 될 수도 있는데요. 맛있는 삶은 계란이 계란 폭탄이 되다니...

디시인사이드 힛갤에 한 게시물이 그걸 잘 보여주고 있습니다.

"아 10알 진짜 욕나온다. 폭발사고..." - 꼬꼬마 ( 디시인사이드 )


계란 삶아서 먹다보니 덜 익어서 노른자가 말랑말랑하자나...
그래서 전자렌지에 넣었지
물론 터질건 알고있어서 껍데기를 살짝 깨서 넣었어
잘익나 유심히 보고있는데 1분정도 지나서 빵~ 하고 터지는거얌.

조낸 놀래서 심장이 벌렁벌렁

웃긴건 저 상황에서 5분간 카메라찾느라 개고생... ㅡㅡ;


출처 - 엽기 갤러리

게시물 전문입니다. 전자레인지에 계란을 넣으면 폭발 할 수도 있다는 사실을 일깨워 주는 게시물입니다. 근데 댓글이 이 게시물을 살렸네요.



댓글이 없었으면 그냥 계란 폭탄에 관한 다큐멘터리가 될 뻔한 게시물을 댓글이 코미디로 만들었습니다. 지금 이 게시물은 "실망 성지"가 되어 있다죠.

아무튼 사진으로만 보면 실감이 안나니까, 전자레인지에서 나온 계란 폭탄을 동영상으로 보여드리겠습니다. 일단 퍼오긴 했는데, 방송영상이어서 언제 짤릴지 모르겠네요.





저 정도의 폭발이라면 그냥 애교 정도의 폭발이 아니라 정말 계란 폭탄이라고 불러도 될 만큼의 상해를 입힐 수준이네요.
전자레인지의 동작 원리와 계란의 구성 성분을 잘 이해를 하면 계란 폭탄의 원리를 알 수 있습니다.

다음 기사를 잘 읽어 보시면, 계란 폭탄의 원리를 이해하실 수 있을 겁니다.

삶은 계란 입속에 넣자 '펑' 폭발 - 서울 신문, 미디어 다음


계란 폭탄의 원리

계란 폭탄의 원리를 이해하기 전에 전자레인지의 동작 원리를 알아야 합니다.


우리가 먹는 음식에는 어느정도의 수분이 포함되어 있습니다.
푸석푸석하고 건조한 빵이라도 그 안에는 물분자가 들어있기 마련이죠. 다만 물 분자가 많이 함유되어 있는 음식은 전자레인지로 쉽게 데워지고 그렇지 않은 음식은 잘 안 데워지는 차이밖에 없습니다.


전자레인지에서는 마이크로파 발생장치가 있어서 전자레인지 내부에 있는 음식으로 마이크로파를 보냅니다.
이 마이크로파는 음식 내부에 있는 물 분자를 때리게 되고, 마이크로파에 맞은 물 분자는 진동을 하게 됩니다.
물 분자가 진동을 하게 되면, 열에너지가 발생하여 음식의 온도가 올라가는 것이 전자레인지의 원리입니다.



그럼 삶은 계란을 전자레인지에 넣고 작동을 시키면 어떻게 되는지 생각해 봅시다.
전자레인지는 계란에도 마이크로파를 발사합니다. 계란 속에 있는 물분자들 역시 마찬가지로 이 마이크로파를 받아서 진동을 하고 열이 나기 시작합니다.
하지만 문제는 계란 노른자와 흰자의 구성 성분의 차이가 있습니다.


바로 수분 함량 차이인데요.
수분 함량이 적은 흰자위는 마이크로파를 받아 가열 되면, 그나마 있던 수분도 더 적어져서 더 질기고 굳어 집니다.
한편 수분 함량이 많은 노른자위는 흰자위에 비해서 많이 가열이 됩니다. 가열된 노른자위는 팽창하여 노른자위 부분의 압력이 증가합니다.
보통 같으면 옆구리가 터지겠지만 마이크로파 덕에 질겨진 흰자위가 노른자위를 압박하게 되죠.
그런 상황에서 젓가락으로 찌르거나 이로 깨물게 되면 높아진 노른자위의 압력이 한번에 분출하면서 ( 마치 풍선이 터지 듯이 ) 계란이 폭발하는 것이죠.


전자레인지에 이런 원리로 폭발 할 수 있는 것들은 돌리지 않는게 좋습니다.
예를 들면, 땅콩이나 밤 같은 견과류나 유리채로 병우유를 데우는 것도 매우 위험한 행동입니다.
전자레인지 조심하시기 바랍니다. ^^


  1. BlogIcon HyunJun 2010.07.30 17:39 신고

    헉.. 전자렌지에 계란 돌려서 길거리에 던지면.. 빵빵 터지겠는데.;;;;
    시위할때 썩은 계란 던지지 말고 전자랜지 계란던지셈..ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ

    설마 진짜 누가 하진 않겟지..ㅎㄷㄷ;

  2. BlogIcon 블로군 2010.07.31 12:13 신고

    헐....진짜 장난아닌데요..
    뭣모르고 전자렌지 돌린후 입으로 물었다가는...헐..
    좋은 정보 감사드려요...

  3. 2011.08.15 22:22

    비밀댓글입니다

    • 2011.09.06 21:11

      비밀댓글입니다

  4. 서영준 2011.12.21 18:54 신고

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  5. BlogIcon New Jordans 2013 2013.02.07 14:51 신고

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  6. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>A

    爱情
    1.男女之间达到无法分离时的状态,通常是以金钱为计量单位的。
    2.在你觉得生活无法再好时开始,又再你觉得生活无法再坏时结束的那一段心灵状态。
    艾滋病
    消化不良所导致的友邦惊诧论,谁摊上谁就是晚年地主。
    哀悼
    告诉别人:显示同情比丧失亲人更为不幸。
    癌症
    终生的内疚,正是它蚕食着你的肉体和灵魂。
    安慰
    一种受到赞扬的欺骗行为,常常围绕某个不幸者产生。
    澳大利亚
    这个国家居民至今还没有明确的归属感,因为他们不知道自己是生活在地球上最小的大陆上,还是最大的岛屿上。
    癌症
    在废除死刑制度之后的民主、法治国度里,授予医生的一种宣判死刑的特权。
    安慰
    人人都使用过和被使用过的武器。当你安慰别人的时候你就觉得高人一等了,安慰是不用付任何代价而能用你使用过的手指揩他人的屁股。
    暗器
    未经提防的杀伤武器,以其短小、飘逸而又精明能干着称。它是以弱胜强,以小胜大的秘密和关键。
    傲慢
    涂在自尊与自重的脸皮上的润滑油,对手下、年幼者、顶头上司以外的鞭长莫及难以报复的大人物都可以傲慢,这是傲慢者摸索总结出的一条安全规则。 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>B

    芭蕾
    以高人一等的脚法表现的老叟百读不懂,小伙百读不厌的东西。
    巴基斯坦
    鸡蛋摔在地毯上导致的一句外语:“巴叽湿毯”。
    半身雕像
    女人胸部的雕塑。
    伴娘
    在新郎眼里最漂亮的女人。
    保证书
    这是厂家的许诺,说它的产品在保修期内不会出毛病。
    被告
    一个被指控的人,在其清白无辜被证明之前,他是有罪的。
    本能
    这是一种先天的知识,它警告你说你根本不知道到底是怎么回事。
    便携式电脑
    可以方便地拎回家去用的公家电脑。

    合法的强词夺理。
    辩论
    这是一种口头或书面的战争,参加战斗的人们轮流怀疑他们的信念,相信他们的怀疑。
    卑鄙
    当某人用不同寻常的方法获得成功时你给他的一种评价,它同时包含了一种懊悔的心情---要是我先能想到如此妙计该多好。
    背部
    是你朋友的身体的一部分,专供你处在不幸之中时注视的。
    备分
    就像大部分人要读世界名着一样,经常想起,经常说起,却从来没有做的一件事。
    笨蛋
    所谓“笨蛋”是这样一种人,你所熟悉的东西他不知道,他知道的东西你也一无所知。
    比赛监督
    对裁判的错误不当场指出,回去向足协打小报告的官员。
    标准
    广告界一种权威奖项的名称。谁的广告做得最多最诱人最无孔不入,谁得产品便可贴上“标准”的标签。
    病毒
    飞进电脑里的苍蝇。
    并行
    旅客上下公共汽车的一种方式,与串行不同,这在无人维持次序时普遍采用。这样的车站叫做并行端口。
    不受欢迎的人
    一般是指国与国之间你打我一个耳光我打你一个耳光之后,互相驱逐的外交人员。他们互相报销对方的返程机票。


    ../../ 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>C


    五花八门的异口同声。
    财富
    财富意味着犯罪而不受惩罚。

    一种引导人变成羊的高深学问。
    残酷无情
    你没有大学文凭却取得巨大成就,这时就有人骂你残酷无情了。
    常驻内存(Resident)
    对大部分人来说,初恋情人、别人欠自己的钱以及自己帮别人做好的事是常驻内存的。
    仓促
    笨拙者的敏捷。
    吵架
    世界上吸引观众最多的体育比赛,由两人或多人参加,通常以参赛者的唾沫星数量及其飞行速度来决定胜负。
    超级替补
    对那些与主教练有隙的着名球员的雅称。
    超过
    超过别人意味着多个仇人。
    抄袭
    使一篇作品产生两分名利效果的最简捷行为。
    扯皮
    迫不及待地想知道“肉”的味道。
    程序
    告诉你一个秘密:电脑其实很蠢,什么事都是我一步步教它的.
    程序员
    剧作家。他们的作品专在电脑屏幕上放映。同电影发展类似,其作品也经历了从无声到有声,从黑白到彩色的过程。与一般剧作家不同的是,程序员长生不老。如果你曾经听说过程序员也有去世的,那只是因为他们自身程序的gosub语句后忘了加上return命令。
    沉默
    谈话的中途,在哑口无言的时候所表现出的美德。
    成就
    努力的终结和厌倦的开始。
    成人
    一个有责任停止嬉笑玩乐的人。
    承诺
    社会上的一种流行病。对足球来说,它不过是一场掩耳盗铃的游戏。
    辞典
    一个个单词按字母顺序汇编成的一本书,单词后面列有一些有用但毫无幽默感的定义,与本魔鬼辞典相比,它不仅用处小得多,而且趣味性也有天壤之别!
    磁盘
    树木的年轮记录着岁月流逝的苍茫;智慧的年轮记载着人类成长的脚步.
    重新启动
    用户的WINDOWS系统出问题后,专家能够给出的最简单最有效的技术支持。同时也是下一次不愉快经历的起点。


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>D

    达尔文
    这个人认为人类是从猴子进化而来的。即使他的祖父很可能就是一只大猩猩,他也不会为此感到不安。──不过,他的祖母恐怕会觉得难以接受。
    代理人
    一个为你办事,他自己赚钱的人。
    代价
    为买某种东西付出的钱数,它和这种东西的真正价值是两码事。
    打印机
    电脑拉肚子时,我给它送纸.奇怪的是,人们拿着那些被泻得"污七八糟"的东西,欣喜若狂.傻帽!
    大脚解围
    危急时不妨大脚解围,让自己有时间清醒一下。
    道德
    你越有道德,你赚的钱越少。
    道歉
    1.为了将来再次冒犯打下伏笔。
    2.精心装潢的借口。
    低三下四
    在数一数二之后,如果你还需要继续下去的话。
    第一职业
    主要用以恢复体力和消磨时光,是第二职业有益的、必要的补充。
    对手
    一个犯有可怕错误的人——他竟敢和你一样渴望取胜。
    电话
    这时一种电子谈话装置,是供那些不能面对面撒谎的人用的。
    多任务(MultiTesk)
    生长在望子成龙家庭中的孩子们必须承担的责任和义务——学电脑、学外语、学音乐、学舞蹈、学画画、学书法……


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>E

    恶霸
    在母亲的肚子里就已经违反了宪法的人。他们活在世上的理由是彻底歼灭别人的世界观。

    能使钓钩变得可口的东西。最好的饵是美色。
    二头肌
    人类男性的羽毛。  


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>F

    法人
    一种法律实体;一个无形的人;一种使个人不承担任何责任却能获得个人利益的巧妙设置(和“政府”相似)。
    返老还童
    喝了第一杯酒,他觉得自己年轻了十岁,喝了第二杯酒,他仿佛又回到了青年时代,第三杯酒下肚,他便返老还童,成了婴儿……他最终是爬着回家去的。
    烦恼
    人类最可信赖的朋友,无论你富贵或贫贱,他总是形影不离的陪伴着你。
    犯规
    竞争不过别人时,就不择手段,遭到惩罚属罪有应得。
    飞机失事
    一种飞行物和地球表面没有预约不合时宜的亲昵事件。由于地球引力对升上天空的人们表现出过分的思念所致。
    风度
    巧装打扮出来的一种修养。
    奉承
    一种只能闻,不能用的香水。
    服装
    用来区别人与动物的标志。
    夫妻
    可翻过来掉过去不停地整顿的合奏曲。 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>G

    干涉他国内政
    这是一种政府行为,由总统和议员茶余饭后商量决定。他们都在自家中雇好了厨师和佣人,能腾出手来要为它国人民料理家务。很显然,这是善行。
    革命
    帽子增加,头颅减少的活动。杀人或被人杀。
    公告板(BBS)
    一个允许用假名说真话的地方。
    公司
    一种躲避税收的设置,它证明赚钱是人生唯一值得一做的事,正因为这一点,有人拥有十几个公司。
    孤单
    家有絮絮叨叨的老婆而又插不上嘴的感觉。
    古典
    爷的爷。
    孤注一掷
    最有把握的铤而走险。
    顾问
    这是一种倒卖别人思想的二道贩子。
    关怀
    1.眼盯盯地瞅着你,让你咽不下一口饭。众所周知,某些国家对我们生活的小小的地球的许多民族都关怀备至。幸好朝鲜、越南、古巴、伊拉克,这些国家逐渐养成了在众目睽睽之下细咽慢嚼的功夫。
    2.堆着满微笑去接触某个人,试图从中得到一些好处。
    广告
    1.一种商品化的谣言,通过传播媒介有组织,有计划地进行扩散。
    2.用真假掺半的话编造无恶意的谎言的艺术。
    鬼脸
    1.攻击者的脸被催泪剂喷射后的表情。
    2.继母的表情。
    果断
    朝着内心赞许的目标毫不迟疑,飞起一脚──结果是自己应声而倒。


    ../../ 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>H

    汉卡
    一些外语没学好的家伙搞出来的东东,结果只使更多的人不好好学习外语.
    行规
    没有文字记录的文字,是让圈内人一切“尽在不言中”的鬼符。
    好汉
    他的主要事迹之一是,为了不让敌人得到情报,他把那只送信的鸽子烤着吃了。
    好奇
    渴望窥视或干涉别人的私生活。
    好奇心
    这是女人心智的一种令人讨厌的性质,是女人们用以替代谨慎的东西。
    合并
    结合在一起,这样就可以分担责任了。
    黑客
    和大多数别的“网虫”一样,他们喜欢光顾各种有意思的网站,不幸的是由于他们年轻没有经验而误从侧门或暗道进入。
    黑手党
    一种犯罪团伙,这些人的所作所为与政治家们的作恶有所不同,因为后者是有组织纪律的,而且往往万无一失。

    误用了的爱情力量。
    红十字协会
    沿着东西、南北两条交叉的血路,来往奔波救死扶伤的世界性组织。
    互联网
    所谓高新技术的确也不过如此,一个二、三岁的小孩就可以在顷刻间轻易地将一团绒线拨弄成一个互联网。
    花瓶
    这是一种容器,通常是用来观看花朵的凋谢的。
    恢复删除(Undelete)
    当我们发现后一个男(女)朋友不如前一个好时通常想要做的事。
    回传
    不能继续前进就暂且退一下吧,谁说这不是在进攻呢?
    火炮
    用以校正国家边界的一种仪器。


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    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>J


    比凤凰更热爱人类的禽类。这样说根据的是古老中国的观点:落魄的凤凰不如鸡。而在今天,世界上所有的凤凰都落魄了,都不如鸡了。鸡比凤凰高一等,但显然比人低一等,尽管人连翅膀也没有。因此,鸡尽心竭力地服务于人,并且分工明确:一些鸡为人提供蛋,一些鸡为人提供肉。
    激情
    一种紧张情绪,它使你的身体发热,同时让你的心在寒风中打颤。
    妓院
    1.供下流女子居住的家庭旅馆。
    2.需要为自己的名声付出昂贵代价的人居住的房屋。
    家谱
    对下层大众来说,它可以说是贫困之根;对富人来说,它意味着心安理得地继承大笔财富;对黑手党来说,它是非法生意的脊椎骨。
    假币
    自然为了减轻造币厂印刷工人的劳动强度,某些不法分子悄悄干起了真币的复制工作,而问题在于银行总是闲他们的产品质量太差而拒绝接纳。
    假球
    长期以来使中国球队在洲际比赛中深受其害的恶劣行径,我们的对策是———“国内练兵,一致对外”。
    假期
    大多数工人一生中的两个星期,在这段时间里他(她)们远离了工作的烦扰,却要忍受她(他)们的配偶的折磨。
    见解
    游离不定的思想,通常是没有可见的依据的。见解往往是从别人那儿借来的,而且是免费的。提见解是男人的特权,不过最近女人也取得了这种权力。见解是很平常的,但它不一定由常识组成。见解就像脑袋一样,每人都有一个。
    建筑风格
    鼻梁的高低肥瘦长短大小。
    键盘
    象某些人一样,没有压力就没有工作的动力,哪里有压迫,哪里就有反抗.
    教程
    通常指收录在光盘上程序以外的类似于游戏的节目。主要让用户了解许多隐藏在程序深处的隐秘,让用户确信他们花了这么多钱是值得的。
    教育
    经过组织的知识,我们为之耗去毕生精力却没有学到手的东西。
    解密高手(Cracker)
    游戏专家、整人专家。玩电子游戏,也玩正版软件作者和生产商。
    金靴奖
    无论以头球见长,还是左右脚均有建树的最佳射手,都只发给一只鞋。
    金融业
    把黄金消化理解的事业。
    精品屋
    人们能以坦然、自得的心情面对贷币大幅度贬值的地方。
    经纪人
    一种国内尚无人从事的使买卖人口披上合法外衣的职业,这使得钻了空子的外来者多采用与人贩子相同的手法大赚我们的钞票。
    鞠躬
    突发性的驼背。


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    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>K

    开放系统
    电脑厂商“吃一亏,长一智”的产物,在系统发生崩溃时可以不致于由某个厂商单独承担责任。用户投诉的对象也更加灵活了。
    空气
    1.慷慨的上帝赏给穷人的营养物品。
    2.被吸入肺中用以产生碳酸气的有毒气体。
    空调
    专门和老天爷唱反调的一种机器。
    恐怖分子
    专门用刑事案件刺激自己胃口的革命者,他们每干成一件事都将是劳苦大众一辈子想干却无法干成的第100件事。恐怖分子的优点在于能够使人们的精神生活一下子紧张起来。他们的不足之处在于偶尔落网。
    会计(accoumtant)
    1.除了老婆以外,可以合法地侦探经理钱袋的人 。
    2.一个长着铅笔脖子的橡皮头。
    快乐
    是这样一种人,面对别人的痛苦表现出异常的兴奋之情。
    宽恕
    所谓宽恕,意味着过河拆桥。
    盔甲
    铁匠铺设计制做的一种时装,该铁匠铺同时兼营长矛和大刀。
    扩展槽
    设在电脑机箱内部的经济开发区,吸引大家投资的地方。


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>L

    老实
    无能的另一种委婉说法。
    老师
    知识的二道贩子,奇怪的是他们从来不交税。
    良言
    听了会难受,不听会更难受的话。
    吝啬
    与“节俭”很难加以区分的孪生兄弟。举例子说,尽可能少牺牲公民的生命就是节俭,而不肯拿出总统一个人的脑袋就是吝啬。
    伦理
    1.一种用字句掩盖欲望的观点。
    2.一种折磨人的观点。
    骆驼
    一种永远驼这背的动物。
    绿地
    相对于无垠的草原,这是长在城市屁股上的一撮毛。 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>M

    马路
    用来测试挖掘机性能和行人涵养的装置。
    帽子
    只要不是绿色的就不值钱。是绿色的我们又都谦让地谁都说没时间戴。
    茅台
    喝者不买、买者不喝的酒。
    魅力
    美的外表。通常是矫柔造作的。
    蜜月
    结婚典礼与真正的生活之间的那段时光。
    免费软件(Freeware)
    为数不多的不用花钱买的小软件。病毒就是一种真正的实实在在的免费软件。
    民主
    很多手脚笨拙的人握在手里的权利。


    ../../ 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>N

    内行
    你要是不耻下问现在几点钟,他就会告诉你怎么制造钟表。
    能力
    能力就像一张支票,除非把它兑换成现金,否则毫无价值。
    女性
    少女或妇女,至于那种身份好,需视她的具体目的而定。
    奴役
    黑色的南非洲的生活方式。


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    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>P

    喷墨打印机
    1.既然有人用拖把、木棒、手指搞所谓的美术、书法创作,医生、护士们也展示了独特的创造力,发明了用注射器写字画画的喷墨打印机。
    2.对在电线杆子或墙壁上写广告的老军医的戏称。
    朋友
    在落魄时随之消逝的一个名词。
    批评
    女人最渴望做的事是批评男人,其次就是花他们的钱。


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    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>Q

    起床号
    学生最不喜欢的一种音乐。
    妻子
    一个已婚的女人。妻子是一种附属物,她往往变成一种装饰品,发挥的却是工具的作用。
    抢逼围
    对美式足球打法的改善。
    敲诈
    敲打面积很小,敲打部位很中肯的承受力试验。
    谦让
    当确信自已放弃后别人不可能接受时的一种举动。
    清零(Reset)
    这是让某个值为零的命令。我们也可留心在现实生活中发现这样的例子。比如每带女朋友逛一次精品店就可以使我们的钱包清零一次。
    清屏
    这条DOS命令主要为游戏迷而设计,起到保护奖金和饭碗的功用。在电子游戏玩兴正浓时,加入领导突然出现,别慌,给他来个CLS。
    情妇
    这是一种女人,在晚上她独占一个已婚的男人,在白天她却独守空房。
    求婚
    这是某个男子献给某个女人的东西,这个女人索要的东西很多,给予的却很少,等这个男人意识到这一点,已经晚了。“谋事在男,成事在女,上帝为证!”
    球迷
    自愿向足协和各俱乐部捐款的爱心奉献者。但可惜受益者不是灾民,而是腰缠万贯的富翁。这是一群无私无畏,蓄意制造贫富差距的人。
    驱动程序(DRIVER)
    驱动你四处寻找的不起眼的小程序。虽不起眼,却能让用户领教牙疼的感觉:驱动程序不算程序,没有了却要命。
    缺席
    它使人心偏向,别人得利。
    裙子
    一种花,以前一般在炎热气候下开放,现在则一年四季都能看到,且花冠越变越小。


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>R

    热情
    虚伪的特殊表现形式。
    热胀冷缩
    自然界的天然规律之一。夏天天气热,白天就变长;冬天天气冷,白天就变短。
    忍让
    是在强大于自已的人面前表现出的一种风度。

    上帝眼中的蚂蚁,蚂蚁眼中的上帝。
    人工智能
    试图让电脑自己思考的一种尖端技术,就像试图让潜水艇自己游泳一样。
    人寿保险
    它关心的不是你的死亡,而是你的死亡方式。这完全是金钱抓住人性的弱点的又一个明证。
    任务
    你所做的事;并不是由于你想做它,而是因为你同意做它,另外,你需要因此而得到钱。 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>S



    1.使本来落在头上的雨点落在裤子上的一种用具。
    2.一种可以用来给爱情增添浪漫色彩的工具,一般是越小越好。
    杀毒软件
    苍蝇拍。
    杀鸡骇猴
    这种教育方式的最终目的是要使猴子学会杀鸡。
    傻B
    瓦解敌人进攻的一种声音。假如萨达姆带领全体伊拉克人齐声高呼此种声音,肯定会吓退美国的航空母舰。
    上帝死了
    上帝一死,这一悲壮事件本身就明确无误地告诉人类:该自己照料自己了。
    上司
    就是你心里诅咒嘴上颂扬、既盼他早死又祝他长寿的那个人。
    删除
    目前所掌握的最有效的文件压缩方法。
    扫描仪
    简直就是吸尘器,所到之处,"垃圾"被原封不动扔进显示器.
    射门
    机会并不多,人生之goal也要抓紧稍纵即逝的时机。
    神经病
    对于不符合自已意志的人给予的一句评语,这种评价往往是相互的。
    圣诞节
    (上帝要求)我们过的一种节日,是用来庆祝大量砍树和花钱的。

    一个蚕豆状的游泳池,其中灌满了尿液。
    失望
    不现实的期望带来的现实的结果。
    生意
    这是一种通过出售产品,提供服务或做假广告(这是最常见的手段)赚钱的事业。
    时髦
    曾经是贫穷象征的补丁如今变成青年服饰特色的体现之一。
    事实
    这是一些可靠的东西,我们常常以它们为基础建立我们的假设。
    世界地图
    即地球表面皮肤示意图,上面标有地球各部皮肤名称,溃烂状态以及寄生虫的分布情况。
    世态炎凉
    一个房地产商人蒙受巨大损失后,他的亲朋好友中至少有一半人已经不认识他了;值得庆幸的是,那另一半人还不知道他已经破产。
    视窗97
    百衲衣,就是袈裟。为了方便用户缝制,微软再其总部以及世界各地许多地方建立了供用户免费领取补丁(PATCH)的站点。
    视窗98
    也叫“Windows 黛安娜”,美丽、诱人、耗资巨大、追逐者无数、午夜疯狂、不幸崩溃……
     

    ../../ 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>T

    探险家
    从不毛之地爬向不毛之地最后又死于不毛之地的一个虱子。
    坦白
    在被别人发现之前承认自己的罪行。
    讨厌鬼
    一个对每一件事都说个没完没了,或对任何事情都无话可说的人;或者是一个会计。
    体能测试
    始于1994年,以李红军等诸多球员惨遭淘汰为标志足球界最早在全国实行“公开下岗”制度。
    天使
    一个在吻你之前咽一下口水,接着喉咙咕噜作响的女孩。
    调制解调器(Modem)
    喜欢在电脑网络上蹦来窜去的家伙,奇怪的是它尽管经常掉线(offline)却总也摔不死,因此人们戏称它为“猫”,猫有九条命嘛。
    调试
    “DEBUG”很可能是一种外国杀虫剂的名字。
    同桌
    学生时代常跟你闹矛盾、在桌上画“三八线”与你争地盘、但毕业后最令你怀念的那个人。
    头饰
    使自己的脑袋有一点多余的废话。
    投机商
    当你失足落水时向你推销救生圈的人。
    推销员
    一个在法律许可的范围内大肆掠夺的人。


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>U

    UPS
    一个总喜欢在停电的炫耀自已的家伙.
     

    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>W

     
    外壳程序(SHELL)
    一种界面美观的鼠标操作训练程序。它把原来敲3、4个键便可以完成的一步操作转换成10个左右的鼠标动作,以帮助用户提高鼠标操作的熟练程度。
    外交家
    一个具备游说天才得人,他能说服你心甘情愿地下地狱,应能使你跃跃欲试,巴不得立即上路。
    网民
    当今全世界出生率最高的人种。和普通人不同的是其年龄长短并非根据活在世上的时间,而是根据已经交纳给ISP(因特网服务提供商)的费用多少而计算。
    网主(Webmaster)
    一种现代的仁慈的蜘蛛,他们从不吃掉撞上网来的那些被叫作“网虫”的虫子,通常只爱想办法慢慢地把网虫们口袋里的钞票掏干。
    唯美主义
    生活中的逃避主义,文学中的色情主义。
    违纪处罚
    以“教育与处罚相结合”为主旨,其指导思想是“杀鸡给猴看”。
    微软
    虫子们(如大名鼎鼎的千年虫millennium bug)共有的特征:又小又软。邪门的是有一家着名的软件公司也叫这个名字,难道他们是专门出产虫子的不成?怪不得Win98从Win95里捉出了3000多只虫子。
    卧式机箱
    自有满腹经纶,哪怕泰山压顶
    无知
    你熟悉的东西他一窍不通,他知道的事情你闻所未闻。
    无聊
    千方百计想怎样才能有事做。
    无条件转移(Unconditional Branch)
    当你的意见同未来的岳父母相左时,你须立即对你的立场所采取的措施即为无条件转移。
    无纸办公
    和无纸卫生间一样,卫生洁具的电视广告中竭力宣传但大部分人目前还消受不起的一种东西。原因有二:一是因为经济,二是因为习惯。
    妩媚
    柔若无骨的眼镜蛇。常常在缠住一个男人的手臂的同时向更多的男人进攻。


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>X

    希特勒
    一把疯狂的菜刀外加先天神经错乱的两只手。
    下课
    俱乐部说:“初恋时,我们不懂爱情”,教练员说:“离婚了,就别再来找我。”
    下载(DOWNLOAD)
    把人家那里的好东东,比如精彩的图片、实用的程序,拖到自己的电脑里来,器过程类似于等待油漆风干。
    显示器
    一个大垃圾桶,某些人总是不厌其烦地在里面反复挑选,寻找一件他们喜欢的东西.(象我这样的)
    现金
    真正的钱。

    对“相似”的命名。她生于人道主义,结果是混乱主义。
    相思
    一种最有效的减肥方法。
    小报告
    一种饮料,由恶意和谎言加上微量事实配制而成的,能有效地削弱领导的洞察力。
    写保护(Write-Protect)
    这是一个有点令人费解的词,它真正的意思是保护起来,不让写入。比如当别人向我们提批评意见时,我们的脑袋往往处于这种写保护状态。
    心心相印
    让最有名的外科医生也束手无策的内脏粘连。
    新娘
    把美好景色抛于身后的人。
    信息中心
    那时一个通常只有专家或权威才能去上班的地方,他们的主要任务是不耐烦地告诉用户为什么他没资格得到他想要的东西。
    虚拟现实
    —新闻界和法律界最先使用这个术语。假新闻和诬告、诽谤等都是虚拟现实技术在社会生活中的生动实例。其实此技术古已有之,只不过当时叫做“莫须有”。
    学院
    这是一种公共机构,学生们到这里来拿学位,至于学习知识,那是毕业以后的事情。 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>Y

    亚当
    因听老婆的话而被赶出乐园的第一个男人,但无论如何不是最后一个这样的男人。
    赝品
    一种新产品,制造者意图用它来取代毛病百出的合格产品。
    眼镜
    可与笔、墨、纸、砚并称的文房第五宝。
    洋教头
    与风雪山神庙中的林教头命运殊途同归的人。外国人戏弄中国球队,中国人戏弄外国教练。俱乐部的老板终于尝到了大脸猫折磨蓝皮鼠的快感。

    人民内部矛盾,必须马上解决的思想问题。
    野蛮人
    1.若干年前我们大家的统称。现在则用来专指我们身体的某一部分的超现实主义动作。
    2.完全未开化的人。他们不会使同类大规模的死亡,这事实足以证明他们的未开化。
    医生
    一个拿到扮演上帝的执照的人。
    医院
    没有铁栏杆的牢笼。在这种牢里,患者面临现代医学所知的各种传染性病毒的威胁,并经常忍受种种科学的折磨。
    遗传的
    不管你有什么缺点,你都可以说是“遗传的”,这种托词太妙了。
    异化
    播下满山的龙种却收获遍野的跳蚤。
    椅子
    使屁股万岁的东西。
    银行
    这是一种盈利机构,它使用你的钱还要叫你付小费;然后为了获得追加利润,它又把你自己的钱借给你。
    硬盘
    一道装满各式菜肴,色、香、味俱佳的大拼盘。
    勇敢
    一种不害怕自己的能力。
    永远
    直到遇上更好的某个人或物。
    优先权
    指至爱亲朋、同学好友或年轻貌美的女士拥有的全力。
    优先中断
    专供下级享用的优先权。比如下级正在打电话而上司也想用电话时,下级即可享受这种优先权。另外,丈夫正在看电视,而老婆恰巧想看另一频道时,也可以享用这种优先权。
    雨伞
    一种可用来给爱情增添浪漫色彩的工具,一般是越小越好。
    语音输入(Voice Input)
    1.吹枕边风。
    2.它是奉献给喋喋不休者的一项伟大发明,计算机会一句不漏地耐心聆听并记录他的话,而且最妙的还在于它绝不还嘴。
    预算税
    你为还没有挣到的收入交付的税款。


    ../../ 笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>Z

    杂技
    用乱七八糟的身体力行换取人们好奇心的一种积木。
    在线聊天系统(Internet RelayChatting,IRC)
    停在电线上的一只只唧唧喳喳叫的庥雀或燕子组成的系统即为在线聊天系统。
    造越位
    十个人同时开溜,留下守门员和对方前锋“单挑”。
    战无不胜
    用一颗原子弹炸毁树下的一个蚂蚁窝或用邪恶将人类微弱的良知轻轻抹去。
    赞赏
    我们对别人与自己相似之处的委婉承认。
    掌声
    用来提醒瞌睡者一段表演已经结束的信号。
    丈夫
    丈夫是这么一种人,结婚前,女人期待他;结婚后,女人怀疑他;死后,女人开始尊敬他。
    哲理
    对宇宙和人生的似懂非懂的道理。
    哲学
    对无法解决的问题的一种莫名其妙的答案。
    争论
    你和你老婆或女友分享的一种东西,因为你犯了不可饶恕之罪——你在她不在场时度过了一段快乐时光。
    政治家
    这是一种商人,他经营的商店是政府。在美国,政治家分两类:自由党人和保守党人。保守党人迷恋于现有的罪孽,自由党人则希望用他们自己选择的恶行代替现存的罪孽。
    知音
    你在千里之外打个喷嚏我都能听到。
    直接存储器存取(DMA-Direct Memory Access)
    向自己的父母要钱就叫DMA。
    资本
    无非就是多几个情人而又常常让情人的眼泪溶化你骨缝中的几块金子。
    支票
    橡皮通货,想象中的钱,一直在邮递途中,很少有能寄到的。
    职业
    一个男人一旦有了这种东西,别人就不能骂他叫花子了,当然,他的老婆除外。
    智者
    知道何时沉默和如何沉默的人。
    自己做(DIY)
    原本只是贴在考场里的一条标语,或由监考老师的口中说出、考生最不愿听到的一句话。没想到现在成了电脑和音响发烧友中颇受欢迎的流行语。
    指南、教程
    通常指收录在光盘上程序以外的类似于游戏的节目。主要让用户了解许多隐藏在程序深处的隐秘,让用户确信他们花了这么多钱是值得的。
    中断请求
    这是发生在只有一根电话线的“网虫”家里的尴尬事。急着要打电话的那位时常发出此类令人反感的请求。


    ../../
    爱情俱乐部


    笑话幽默->>魔鬼词典>>魔鬼定律

    罗伊尔定律

    凡事都要往好处想,如果你掉进一个池塘,说不定屁股口袋里会装进一
    条鱼呢。


      扑克游戏定律
    赢者说说笑笑,输者高喊“发牌”


      拉纳透纳定律
    一个成功的男人就是赚的钱比太太花的要多;一个成功的女人就是找到
    这样的男人。


      彼得成功定律
    站起来的次数要比被击倒的次数多一次。


      邦尼人力定律
    一个人在一分钟内可挖一个洞,六十个人在一秒钟内却办不到。



      卡尔─汉斯定律
    官方之说,就像比基尼泳装:隐藏重点,展现诱惑。


      墨菲争执定律
    绝不跟一个傻瓜争辩──别人搞不清楚到底谁是傻瓜。


      劳伦斯─彼得定律
    许多人爬到了梯子的顶端,却发现梯子架错了墙。


      莫德尔定律
    没有什么事严重到可以讥笑或被讥笑的程度,除了裤裆开了。


      酸葡萄定律
    吃不到的葡萄,总是酸的。



      布尔克定律
    如果总统不把气发在太太身上,就会把它发在国家上。


      社论第一定律
    非常骄傲地发表了一篇精彩文章并期待得到读者的热烈反应时,你将只
    收到一封来信, http://www.nbabigstore.com/ James Harden Swingman Home Jersey,信中告知本报第四版右下角有个排版错误。


      政客定律
    他们可以许诺你在没有河的地方架起一座桥来。


      费林挫折定律
    当你的猫坐在你的大腿上睡着了,你又不忍心惊醒它时,你突然便意甚
    浓,要去厕所。


      杜鲁门定律
    他们要是需要我,定会来找我的。



      哈里─福斯迪克定律
    憎恨别人就像为了逮住一只耗子而不惜烧毁你自己的房子。



    福斯特四十岁定律
      人在少年时总想等到了四十岁就毁了自己,活到四十岁的时候又
    想重活一遍。



    麦法兰借钱定律
      借钱给别人的人,总是把借出的钱凑成整数。



    格拉斯运气定律
      运气在盼的时候不会来到,盼来的运气不是运气。



      法兰克定律
    就爱而言,女人是专业的,男人是业余的。


      弗雷德定律
    今天是威风凛凛的公鸡,明天呢──可能成为威风扫地的鸡毛掸子。


      兰德定律
    好不容易鞋子合脚了,可样式又过时了。


      苦桔子定律
    路边的桔子,要是没被吃光,就一定是苦的。


      口袋定律
    两个口袋的衣服叫学生服;三个口袋的叫西服;四个口袋的叫中山装;
    衣服上到处是口袋,如果不是时髦,肯定是讨饭的叫花子。


      伊夫现象
    你最感合适最喜欢的商品仅供陈列。


      拿纳姆定律
    婚姻就是把猫头鹰变成家鸽的尝试。


      花钱定律
    越有钱的人花起钱来越小气。
    男人的钱花在嘴上:吸烟、喝酒;女人的钱花在穿着上。所以因为贪嘴
    拿公家钱去大吃大喝犯错误的都是些男人,而在晚场舞会上穿得一个比
    一个漂亮的是女人。


      科尔兰会议定律
    会议的价值和出席会议的人数成反比。


      科弗特谈话定律
    如果不想让孩子听你在说些什么,就装着正对他们说。


      婆媳定律
    做媳妇时,和婆婆拌口角,觉得婆婆没道理;
    做婆婆时,和媳妇拌口角,觉得媳妇没道理。


      德克西四十九岁定律
    四十九岁时最大的安慰是意识到对于死去的年轻人来说年龄太大了。


      乐观与悲观定律
    乐观者发明了游艇,悲观者发明了救生圈;
    乐观者建造了高楼住房,悲观者生产了求火栓;
    乐观者去作了玩命的赛车手,悲观者却穿起了白大褂当了医生;
    最后乐观者发射了宇宙飞船,悲观者则开办了保险公司。


      考克兰定律
    存着的报纸一张都用不着,真的到了要处理时又哪张都不能扔。



      挑选军人做丈夫定律
    少尉太小,上尉太老,中尉正好。


      单相思定律
    就是要把她放在心里,她把我放在心外。


      骑自行车定律
    骑自行车带人──
    孩子坐前老婆坐后,那叫传统;老婆坐前孩子坐后,那叫新潮。


      埃特勒就业现象
    别的行业都比所在行业发展快。如果一旦改行了,那么原来所在的行业
    就飞速发展了。


      道格拉斯实用飞行定律
    当设计图纸的重量等于飞机时,飞机就能飞行了。



      克里斯托尔定律
    遭到失败是件麻烦事,但获得成功时,真正的祸患就开始了。


      历史学家定律
    任何事件,只要发生过,就会让老资格的历史学家说成是不可避免的。


      鲍伯医学法则
    看到大夫诊室的花枯了就千万别再进去。


      帕金森定律
    时间充峪时,工作随之膨胀;收入增加时,花销随之增长。


      第一定律
    在拿到第二个以前,千万别扔掉第一个。



      康普特准则
    人容易犯错误,但要想把事情彻底弄得一塌糊涂,还得依靠计算机。


      鲁尼恩定律
    赛跑时不一定快的赢;打架时不一定弱的输。


      福克兰定律
    没有必要做出决定时,就有必要不做决定。


      韦伯定律
    如果你顺当地找到停车的地方,那你就会找不着你的车。


      博肯定律
    剧场里越是不靠近过道的座位上的观众就来得越晚。



      卡德宁定律
    你得到最多的是你不需要的东西。


      劳森定律
    如果介绍上说“勿失良机”,那你就会失去。


      贾斯特交通行为定律
    车越破开得越疯。


      贝克经济学定律
    你所能提供的东西,你一个也不要。


      琼斯定律
    朋友或来或走,敌人只来不走。


      写字定律
    从某种意义上说,医院里的大夫完全可以和耍笔头的书法家媲美,
    书法家的狂草和门诊大夫开的药方一样令人难以辨认。
    【大夫的笔法更是自成一体,而书法家尚且有章可循。】

      架脚定律
    女人架脚不雅,男人架脚潇洒。


      女人定律
    对男人一知半解的女人,最后做了男人的妻子。
    对男人全都了解的女人,最后成了老处女。


      做饭定律
    女人没下班就溜回家,是因为做饭;
    男人下了班不忙回家,也因为做饭。


      马歇尔广义冰山定律
    任何事物只能了解到它的八分之一。





      岁数定律
    岁数比过去大了,脾气比过去小了。


      “怕三角”定律
    男人的弱点是怕老婆,老婆的弱点是怕儿子,儿子的弱点是怕老子。


      萨盖定律
    有一块手表的人知道准确的时间,戴两块手就不敢说几点了。


      艺术和科学的黄金法则
    掌握黄金者掌握尺度。


      戈登第一定律
    如果一个研究项目根本不值得做,则不值得好好地做。


      贝思特定律
    一个产品保证的越多,就越不可信,如廉价的音响标有“超级”字样。


      贝克定律
    如果你认为受教育太花钱,可以试试无知的滋味。


      格里森之谜
    极小的洞也终将把最大的容器流空,除非它是故意用来排水的;
    而在这种情况下,它又会堵塞。


      艾贝利定律
    婚姻只是个貌合神离的联盟,双方都认为自己是盟主。


      豪利大问题定律
    每一个大问题里,都有一个小问题露面。


      艾格尼斯─艾伦定律
    万事易进不易出。


      梅尔定律
    要不是最后一分钟,那么什么事也做不成。


      能力定律
    在两种情况下,人们特别容易高估自己的能力:一是恋爱中的男
    人,他们发誓要为女朋友做的事总要超过自己的能力;一是当了科长
    想当处长,当了处长想当局长的人。


      吉尔伯特定律
    工作危机最确凿的信号是没有人跟你说该怎么做。


      记性定律
    男人能记住恋人的生日,确说不出母亲的岁数。



      失眠定律
    就是开了电视睡得着,关了电视反而睡不着。


      梅勒定律
    如果事实和理论不一致,则事实必须被除去。


      金宁推论
    面包掉地时,黄油朝下的概率和地毯的价格成正比。


      寨莫吉关于发展系统动态特性的第一定律
    您一旦打开了一罐蚯蚓,再将其装罐的唯一方法,是用一个更大的罐。


      计划的90-90规则
    任务的前90%需要90%的时间,任务的后10%又需要90%的时间。


      选择性落体定律
    一个物体将按照最大危害的方式落地。


      期望的非互逆定律
    不希望发生的事结果便不发生;
    希望实现的事却实现不了。


      “不能提”定律
    有些事情,只要一提起,……
    ……如果是件好事,肯定错过;
    ……如果是件坏事,肯定发生。


      波伦第一定律
    疑惑时含糊其词。


      艾托雷的观察
    两队并行(自己在其中的一队),总是另一队快。



      加宁哭泣定律
    这一次你痛哭了,下一次你就哭不起来。


      费克尔遗忘定律
    忘记要带去用的东西的人,总是住在最高一层楼上。


      凯茜求爱定律
    你向你最喜爱的姑娘求爱的同时,你最喜爱的姑娘必定正在向另一个
    男人献媚。


      西姆斯礼物定律
    你送给一个男的礼物,他多半转赠给了他的妻子。


      米勒打猎定律
    你要射击的羊,中弹后多半要掉到山崖下。



      靡菲定律
    任何事情,只要能往坏的方向发展,它就一定往那个方向发展。


      约翰投诉电话定律
    你打过一次的投诉电话的号码,以后就再也不会忘记了。


      卡麦洛捡钱定律
    你正缺少一分钱的时候,满地也找不着平时总看得着也没去捡的
    这一分钱。


      豪氏定律
    每个人都有一个计划无法实现。


      诺尔斯定律
    辩论时间的长短与问题的严重性成反比。



      司宾塞定律
    越是贪馋的人,越容易有好东西吃。


      休斯傻瓜定律
    经常说“我没有这么傻”这句话的人,久而久之大家就都会把他
    当做一个傻瓜。


      卡索吉尔定律
    你懒得去接的电话,多半是打给你的。


      失火定律
    家里失火的时候,最先醒的人危险最大。


      维奥斯特灾难定律
    一切灾难中的第一个灾难,看起来都不象是一场灾难。


      科德尔定律
    想爬上山去的人,最后都爬了上去。
    想下水游泳的人,最后多数、都坐在岸边。


      乔伊斯风雨定律
    刮大风的时候,人总是迎着风走;
    下大雨的时候,人一到家雨就停。


      甘宁父亲节定律
    在父亲节的那天,男人做家务的劲头最大。


      家庭联盟定律
    孩子小的时候,父母是一对相互勾结的阴谋家。
    孩子长大的时候,女儿常和父亲站在一边,儿子常和母亲扎成一团。


      加布里埃定律
    你最不愿见的人,经常登门拜访。


      里博特回忆定律
    一个沉湎于往事的人,日子一定比别人过得艰难。

      卡通葬礼定律
    最想参加你的葬礼的人,是那个一生都仇恨你的人;
    最不愿参加你的葬礼的人,则一定是借给你钱的人。

      骗子定律
    没有得手的骗子比得手的骗子还要彬彬有礼。

      醉鬼定律
    醉鬼没钱的时候酒瘾最大。

      劳埃德保险业定律
    保险业本身也是需要保险的行业。

      马克尤斯成功定律
    成功是两段乏味生活中的小小的停顿。

      整容定律
    热衷于整容的人长相一般都不差,对整容非常不感兴趣的人也大
    多漂亮。

    ../../

  7. BlogIcon 人造石英石 2013.03.22 22:22 신고

    上海中意石英石工程有限公司引进意大利 http://www.1995zy.com 人造石英石生产技术,结合本企业的生产实际,采用高科技纳米技术研制开发生产的人造石英石系列产品,以其坚硬耐磨、无明显色差、无毒无放射、搞冲击、不开裂、抗污染、不渗透的优良产品性能,在众多的商场、宾馆、学校、会所及家庭装修等工程应用中得于首肯,是理想的绿色环保新型装饰石材。多次被评为"人造石产品奖"和"AAA级信的过绿色环保产品"。


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  8. BlogIcon 复印机租赁 2013.03.22 22:22 신고

    http://www.jiaji568888.cn/ 上海 http://www.jiaji568888.cn 佳吉快运有限公司成立于1994年,是一家以公路运输为主,兼营航空、海运的全国网络型运输公司, 乃全国名列三甲的现代化的大型第三方物流企业, 拥有国内最先进的运输工具和管理设施。 总部设在上海市青浦区徐泾镇北青公路2999号。


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  9. BlogIcon 佳吉物流 2013.03.22 22:23 신고

    上海聚起计算机科技有限公司是专业生产各类显示设备,计时仪器的综合公司,本公司有多年研制生产经验,技术先进,质量上乘.

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  10. BlogIcon 上海佳吉快运公司 2013.03.22 22:24 신고

    上海荃安贸易有限公司以世界知名的刀具产品、优质的服务来满足客户的需求!

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  11. BlogIcon 复印机租赁 2013.03.22 22:24 신고

    上海经马速递有限公司.是一家经国家工商局批准的专业从事国际、国内货运快件业务,长久以来累积丰富的经验. http://www.jingmakd.com http://www.jingmakd.com 上海快递公司拥有一支敬业高素质,有责任的优秀团队,软硬件设施齐全,公司与多家航空公司有着长期密切的合作关系,操作方式应客户所需,灵活多样,价格合理,服务周到.

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번개 슬로우 모션으로 보기


슬로우 모션은 어떤 물체의 움직임이나 현상을 현실세계보다 느리게 재생을 해서 사물의 행동을 과장되고 강조되게 보이도록 하는 CG( 컴퓨터 그래픽 ) 기술입니다.

슬로우 모션을 보여주는 방법은 몇 가지가 있는데, 그 중에 가장 많이 사용되는 방법은 일반적인 카메라로 영상을 찍어서 느리게 재생하는 방법과 초고속 카메라를 이용해서 일반 카메라보다 훨씬 많은 프레임 ( 프레임 : 동영상을 이루는 여러개의 사진 중에 하나의 사진을 의미 ) 찍어서 정상적으로 재생하는 방법이 있습니다.

전자는 느리게 재생을 하는 방식이기 때문에 움직임에 끊김 현상이 있지만 후자는 초고속 카메라라는 비싼 장비를 이용해서 초당 훨씬 더 많은 프레임을 찍고 그 프레임을 정상적으로 재생을 하기 때문에 훨씬 부드럽게 슬로우 모션을 보여 줄 수 있습니다.

서론이 너무 길었네요.
초고속 카메라를 이용해서 신기하고 재미있는 영상을 많이 볼 수 있는 곳이 바로 자연 현상입니다. 물방울이 떨어져서 깨져버리는 모습이나 여기서 소개해 드릴 번개가 치는 순간을 카메라로 찍어서 슬로우 모션으로 보여주는 것들이 초고속 카메라를 재미있게 활용 할 수 있는 방법입니다.

번개치는 장면 슬로우 모션으로 보기

번개가 치는 모습을 슬로우 모션으로 담은 동영상이 여러개가 있더 군요.
멋진 모습을 담은 영상으로 소개해 드리겠습니다.











번개에 대한 상식 몇 가지


1. 번개는 왜 지그재그로 칠까?


우리가 번개를 그릴 때 항상 지그재그 모양으로 그립니다. 왜 번개는 지그재그로 칠까요?
번개는 잘 알다 시피 전류입니다. 전자의 흐름이라는 뜻이죠. 구름 사이에 존재하는 먼자나 수증기 입자들이 서로 부딫히면서 구름 꼭대기와 구름 아랫쪽으로 대전이 되게 됩니다. 마찰전기라고 하나요? 예를 들어 구름 꼭대기는 (+) 전하로 대전이 되고, 구름 아랫쪽은 (-) 로 대전이 되는 것이죠. ( 스웨터를 벗을 때 정전기가 발생하는 원리와 비슷합니다. )

구름 아랫쪽이 강하게 대전되었을 때, 지상과의 전위차가 발생합니다. 예를 들어 지상은 약하게 (+)로 대전되어 있고, 구름의 하단부는 (-)로 대전되는 식이죠. 이 전위차가 일정 수준 이상 차이가 나면 불안정한 상태를 견디지 못 하고, 구름에 있는 전자들이 지상으로 쏟아 집니다. 이런 현상이 번개죠.

전기는 기본적으로 저항이 작은 쪽으로 흐르게 되어있습니다. 전깃줄에서 고무로 되어 있는 피복 부분보다 저항이 낮은 전선 부분으로 전자가 흐르는 이유도 바로 이런 이유인데요. 번개가 치는 순간 공기 중에 전자가 흐르게 되는데, 이 때, 흐르는 전류는 저항이 가장 낮은 부분으로 흐르게 됩니다. 그래서 구름에서 전자가 쏟아져 나오는 순간부터 대기중의 저항이 낮은 부분을 찾아 다니면서 흐르게 됩니다. 이렇기 때문에 번개가 지그 재그로 치는 것처럼 보이게 되는 것이죠.


2. 번개는 하늘에서 내려오기만 한다?


번개는 위에서 말씀 드렸다 시피 대전된 지상과 구름사이의 전자 흐름, 즉 전자 교환입니다. 위의 슬로우 모션을 보시면 아시겠지만 항상 하늘에서 내려오는 것은 아니고 지상에서 하늘로 올라가기도 합니다. 그 순간이 워낙에 짧기 때문에 우리 눈에서는 하늘에서 번개가 내리 치는 것처럼 보이는 것이죠.

뿐만아니라 구름과 구름 사이, 구름 내부에서도 강하게 대전된 부분 사이에서 번개가 치기도 합니다. 폭풍이 밀려오면 구름 사이가 번쩍 번쩍 하는 것을 본 기억이 있죠? 그게 바로 구름 사이에 번개가 치기 때문입니다.


3. 자동차 안에서 번개를 맞으면 어떻게 될까?


결론적으로 안전합니다. 물론 운전하고 있지 않은 상황에서 말이죠.
이유는 위에서와 같습니다. 전기는 낮은 저항을 따라서 흐르게 되는데, 사람의 피부나 사람의 몸 속보다는 자동차 표면의 금속 부분이 저항이 낮습니다. 또 한, 비가 오고 있었다면 차 표면의 저항은 빗 물 덕에 더더욱 낮아지게 되는데, 전기가 굳이 저항이 높은 사람의 몸을 통해서 흐르지 않아도 더 넓고 저항도 작은 차 표면을 따라 흘러서 지표면으로 나가게 됩니다.

이 때 주행중이라면 위험할 수도 있는 것이 자동차를 통해 흐르는 전기가 타이어를 만나게 되면 높은 저항과 전류의 상호 작용으로 타이어가 소위 "빵꾸"가 나게 됩니다. 그리고 순간 적으로 흐르는 전류에 의한 유도 자기장으로 인해서 자동차의 전자 부품들이 오작동을 일으킬 수도 있으므로 번개가 친다면 주행을 멈추고, 혹은 저속으로 운행하는 것이 좋습니다.


4. 피뢰 침의 원리


높은 건물 꼭대기에는 피뢰침이라는 것이 달려 있습니다.
번개를 유도해서 건물 자체를 보호하는 장치인데요. 이도 마찬가지로 지상으로 흐르려는 번개가 저항이 낮은 곳을 찾다가 피뢰침으로 흐르게 됩니다. 그리고 피뢰침은 접지 되어 있어 사람들에게 피해를 주지 않지요.

일반적으로 피뢰침에서 45도로 원뿔을 그린 부분이 안전한 범위라고 알려져 있습니다. 번개가 친다면 건물안으로 들어가거나 위에서 처럼 시동을 끈 상태로 자동차에 탑승하시면 되겠습니다.


슬로우 모션 뿐만아니라 접사 카메라로 자연을 찍은 사진들도 굉장히 멋진 사진들이 많이 있습니다. 역시 카메라로 담는 가장 좋은 작품은 자연 현상이 아닌가 생각이 드네요.


  1. BlogIcon 블로군 2010.07.28 20:03 신고

    슬로모션으로 보니까 느낌이 색다르네요...
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    假货的笑话

    顾客:“你们卖的酒怎么没有酒味啊?”
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    并不是夸张

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    国际倒爷???

    此系本人的亲身经历,转述如下,聊以一笑:

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    顿时,我的睡意全消,忍不住回头瞟了二人一眼,二人聊性正浓,这时,
    甲不无遗憾的说道:只可惜十来张刘德华全砸手里了…。

    恍然顿悟。



    领导讲话

    同志们,在改革的过程中,我们一定要旗帜鲜明地肯定那些应该肯定的事物,否定那
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    一无所知

    两个朋友在酒吧里聚首,其中一个对另一个人问道:我妻子不了解我,你妻子呢?另
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    上次讲的是中队长,这次再侃侃我们的区队长。区队长来自河北农村,十分纯朴。在
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    女儿去住宿学校上学,临走把一盆盆栽和热带鱼交给我。
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    吝啬

    一对地主夫妇,出名地吝啬。一天男的进城去,走着走着想上厕所,但转念一想:这
    么好的肥料可不能便宜了别人。于是一直憋着。后来实在憋不住了,找个厕所就上。
    可是也除了放几个屁之外,什么也没有拉出来。于是心中得意不已。回到家里,向老
    婆讲述自已的经历。谁知老婆一听大怒:你这个败家子,哪有你这样过日子的,省下
    这几个屁来吹灯该多好!


    你的电源不兼容

    我从前在一家计算机商店工作。一天我们接到一位先生的电话,说他的计算机电源在
    冒烟。服务人员费了不少的力气,也没法让那位先生相信他的硬件有问题。

    服务人员:先生,你的电源里有什么东西烧了。
    顾客:肯定有什么命令,加入autoexec。bat,就可以解决这个问题的。
    服务人员:软件对于你的问题是无能为力的。
    顾客:我知道可以加进去什么……一条命令……要不就该加到config。sys
    里去。

    (几分钟的反复说明之后)
    服务人员:好了,我本不该告诉你这些的。在一些dos版本里有条秘密命令,你可
    以用的。请你编辑autoexec。bat文件,在最后加一行c:\dos\no
    smoke,再重新启动计算机。

    (顾客照办了)
    顾客:电源还在冒烟。
    服务人员:我想你得给微软公司打电话,跟他们要一份nosmoke。exe的更
    新文件。

    (顾客挂断了电话。我们以为和他的交道打完了。没想到他四小时后又给我们来电话)
    服务人员:你好,先生。计算机怎么样了?
    顾客:我给微软去了电话。他们说我的电源和微软的nosmoke。exe不兼容,
    我必须换台新电源。你们什么时候能帮我换一下吗?


    那是四年前的事了,当时我正在上大学。
    小丽是一个漂亮纯情的女孩子,她是我的女朋友,同学们都说我们是天生地造的一双。
    我们的关系发展得很迅速,很自然的,某个暑假,我将她带回了家。我并没有回自己
    的家,而是去了舅舅家,因为舅舅是一个百万富翁,我想向她炫耀一番。舅舅很热情,
    小丽玩得也很开心。
    今天,我和小丽在咖啡厅再一次见面了。
    她问:“你现在好吗?还是一个人吗?”
    “是!”
    “你应该找一个女朋友了,不要沉湎于往事之中。我和我丈夫都很关心你。”
    “舅妈,谢谢你和舅父的关心,我会有女朋友的!”我气愤地答道。


    某幼儿园某阿姨,夫妻伉俪情深。一日夫来探妻,众小儿已知巴结阿姨,齐奔至阿姨
    面前大呼:“阿姨,阿姨,你爸爸接你来了。”众阿姨喷饭。


    小明的爸爸对小明说:今天你要是乖乖的,爸爸就带你去集市上,看别人吃糖。


    传染病

    你得了一种恶性传染病,医生对病人说,我们准备让你住进隔离病区,在那里,你可
    以吃到薄煎饼和比萨饼。
    比萨饼和薄煎饼能医治我的病吗
    当然不能。医生说,但这是我们唯一能从门缝里塞进去的食品。



    跳伞

    空中跳伞造型学校的教员在上完第一节课后,询问学员是否有什么问题。“我们每跳
    一次要交多少钱?”一学员问,“10$!”另一学员显得有点紧张,站起来问:
    “如果在跳伞时打不开降落伞怎么办?”“不要担心,如果打不开降落伞我们会把钱
    退给你。”教员答道。



    私有化

    今天中午,我朋友坐在我旁边儿复习“社建”,忽然指着一页问我,中国如果搞私有
    化,必将成为资本主义大国是什么意思.我们琢磨了一会儿不得要领.只好往下看.
    喔!原来下一页的开头是“的附庸”。


    发动摩托车?!

    有次上英语课,外面传来阵阵发动摩托车的声音。这声音持续了很久,吵得人不得安
    稳。这时候,老师发现了大家的烦躁,摇头说,“中国的摩托车呀……。唉!”下课
    了,我们才发现,是工人在伐木!



    一皇帝出巡多年返京,忽文一皇妃生子,心想:我在外这么久,她这会怀孕生子,准
    是身旁太监所为。于是大怒召集所有太监,并另他们排队报数。(太监的细声)1,
    2,3,4………。5(粗声)。
    不用报了,皇上说,把那个5关进死牢明天问斩。
    夜过三更,那皇妃怀抱婴儿偷入死牢,对5说:我已买通牢役,咱俩快逃,到一个谁
    也找不到的地方过幸福生活。5说:来不及了,已经晚了。(细声的)




    三明治

    海关官员拦住一位旅客,并问他是否带有应报关物品。
    “没有。”旅客答道。
    “您肯定没有么?”
    “当然。”
    “那么你身后的这头耳朵上夹着面包片的大象是怎么回事?”
    “先生,我的三明治里夹什么东西完全是我自己的事!”



    我家的表叔数不清,没有大婶不登门



    一天,有两个台湾人,和两个美国人坐火车旅行,美国人买了两张票,而台湾人却只
    买一张票,美国人觉的很讷闷,于是就等着看台湾人怎么做。
    过了没多久,列车长来查票,美国人就看着台湾人一起跑进厕所,列车长来敲门,他
    们就递出一张票给列车长剪票。美国人想,这…这真是高招啊呀!!
    回程时,美国人有样学样,只买了一张票,可是却看那两个台湾人这次连票都不买,
    两个美国人更是丈二金刚摸不着头脑,就想再看看两个台湾人还有何高招。
    过了没多久,列车长又来查票,这时美国人就赶快躲到厕所去,等列车长来剪票,其
    中一个台湾人,就起身到美国人的藏身处,敲了敲门,门中递出一张车票,他就把车
    票拿走了……。


    一连长新官上任,要给士兵询话,一老兵实在听不进去,遂渐入梦乡。岈长看见就停
    住了,边上的人推了老兵一把,老兵揉揉眼,睡眼朦胧地问:狗日的嚼完了?



    消防队接到电话报警。

    消防队:哪里着火了?
    报警人:我家。
    消防队:我是问在什么地方?
    报警人:在厨房。
    消防队:我是说我们怎么去?
    报警人:你们不是有消防车吗?!



    有一天……。
    熊和兔子在森林里大便……。
    於是熊问兔子:毛沾到大便无所谓吗?????
    兔子回答:无所谓啊!!
    於是熊就用兔子擦屁股…………。



       
    新来的女秘书美丽迷人,两位主管决计亲自指点她工作。「教导她该怎样不该怎样,
    是我们的责任,」甲说。「对,」乙兴奋的说,「你负责教导她该怎样。」



    我去参观气象站,看到许多预测天气的最新仪器。参观完毕,我问站长:「你说有百
    分之七十五的机会下雨时,是怎样计算出来的?」站长不必多想便答道:「那就是说,
    我们这里有四个人,其中三个认为会下雨。」



    某日!一艘渡轮因暴风雨而沉没於大海之中!只有三个人生还!分别是一个成功的商
    人,一位少年,及一位流浪汉!
    一个月後,少年从海中捞起一个神灯!他擦了擦!突然有一个精灵跑出来,并且让他
    们每人各许一个愿望!商人在乎他的事业!他说:我要回我的公司赚钱!精灵点点头!
    呼的一声!商人消失了!少年很想念他的家人!!於是他说:我要回家!!精灵又点
    点头!!呼的一声!少年也不见了!!精灵问流浪汉:你ㄋ?你想许啥愿望?流浪汉
    想了想!说:嗯~我也不知道我要啥?不过一个人在这倒挺无聊的!!嗯~叫他们两人
    来陪我吧!!於是!!又呼~的一声!商人和少年又回来了!!!


    一日,一架飞机飞过一个精神病医院…
    突见驾驶员大笑…
    空中小姐很好奇的问:「你为何笑得那麽开心啊??」
    只见他说:「他们知道我逃出来,一定会气疯的…哈哈哈……」


    一个波兰人看到朋友穿了一双鳄鱼皮鞋,大为羡慕。一问之下,价钱昂贵非凡,他便
    决定自己去猎杀一只鳄鱼。
    他找到一个沼泽,跳下水去和一一只鳄鱼恶斗许久,好不容易才把鳄鱼拖上岸,却大
    叹一口气道:「浪费了那麽多时间,这只鳄鱼竟然没穿鞋。」



    小明和小华正在看晚间社会新闻报导……。
                       
    画面:一名男子在高楼上想跳楼自杀......
    小明:你猜他会不会跳?
    小华:不会!
    小明:我说他会!我们来打赌200元!好不好?
    小华:OK!我跟你赌!
    画面:男子纵身向下跳!

    小华就给小明200元!
    五分钟後..................

    小明良心不安地对小华说:这200元还你,其实我中午看过报导,所以知道他会跳
    ............
    小华:200元是属於你的,因为我中午也看过报导,只是不知道他为什麽还要“再跳一次”???
    小明:#@%$%@$*!?



    二个虚荣心很强的狗主人在聊天。
    我们家的狗会看报纸耶!韵韵说道。
    是啊,我知道!倩倩回答道:我们家的小黑狗前些日子告诉过我了!


    一天,老爸很生气的问三个儿子说:谁!是谁把流动厕所推到河里的???三个儿子
    没人承认!於是老爸说了个华盛顿的故事给儿子听!!小儿子深受感动,便承认是他
    干的!!反而得到一顿毒打!小儿子哭着问老爸:为何我说实话还要被打???老爸
    很生气的说:当时华盛顿他老爸可没蹲在树上啊!



    新兵在十三个星期的基本训练期中,睡的是硬地,吃的是军粮,因此训练一完毕,便
    即着想回家,好睡乾净的床褥,吃母亲的饭。到家的那一天,全家人热烈迎接他。他
    母亲更兴高采烈地说:「我们已经准备好全家去露营,为你庆祝!」


    老板:「今天你为什麽迟到?」
    职员:「因为你昨天宣布只许在家里看报。」


    在外面待了一个星期的村民,脚步蹒跚的回到家里,衣履不周,筋疲幡竭。「你到那
    里去了?」他妻子问。「我到树林里去查看酿酒蒸馏器,一只大熊突然在我面前出现。
    我拼命逃跑,终於摆脱了它。我从来没有跑过那样快!」那是一星期以前的事,後来
    你到哪里去了?」村民倒在椅子上,说:「走回来!」


    阿富看电影时转过头去问他旁边的朋友:「你要不要跟我打赌,我敢去打那个秃子一
    下?」「你打他而他不还手?我赌五十元。」阿富走到秃子後面,在他头上打了一下,
    然後说道:「嗨,老雷!」那秃子惊诧的回过头来,答道:「你认错人了,我不是老
    雷。「对不起,」阿富说完便走回自己的座位,收下他朋友输给他的五十元。「你敢
    不敢打赌我可以再打他一次?」他问他的朋友。朋友不相信, http://www.csnthunder.com/ Thunder Authentic Road Jersey,跟他赌一百元。阿富再
    走到秃子後面,又打了他的头一下,然後说:「唷,别装蒜啦,老雷,我知道是你。」
    「老兄,我已经告诉过你是你认错人了。」,阿富道歉後又走开了。秃子气冲冲的换
    了个位置。但是喜欢恶作剧的阿富不久便发现了他坐在什麽地方。他对朋友说:「你
    还敢不敢再赌一次,我又要去打他了。」这回阿富走到秃子那里,在他头上打了一下,
    说道:「嗨,你猜怎样,老雷?刚才我把坐在前面的那个秃子错认了是你!」



    鲨鱼看着一个滑浪风帆运动员说:「招待真周到。既有早餐,又有盘子和餐巾。」



    脾气古怪的老家伙布先生,理发时总是多般挑剔,所有的理发师都受过他的埋怨。有
    次理发,他坚持要把头发中间分界。「我办不到,」理发师说。「为什麽办不到?」
    布先生喊道。「因为您的头发是单数的。」


    波兰女人抱怨说,她虽然有电视机又有电冰箱,却没有东西可以放入冰箱。有人提议:
    「为什麽不把电视机放在冰箱里面,那就什麽都齐全了。」


    驾车游欧的女士站在希腊一处古迹的倒地石柱前拍纪念照。「千万别把汽车拍进去,」
    她大声说,「不然我丈夫一定会说是我把柱子给撞倒的。」


    瘦弱的小毛虫给漂亮的雀小姐发现了,连忙哀求道:「请不要吃我,我可以告诉你我
    同伴的住处,它们比我肥美的多呢!」雀小姐答:「不必了,我正在减肥。」说罢便
    把毛虫一口吃掉。


    年轻人下班回家,发现新婚妻子在发愁。「我真是没用,」她说,「我刚才替你熨那
    套西装,把裤子臀部烧了个大洞。」「不要紧,」她丈夫安慰说,「那套衣服我多备
    了一条裤子。」「对,」妻子高兴起来说,「幸亏这样,我用那条裤子把烧的洞补上
    了。」


    下雨天,一个同学问我弟弟有没有看见任何一个和他同路的女生,好让他能和她共用
    一把伞。弟弟问他为什麽,同学打开一把颜色□丽的印花雨伞说:「那样便没有人会
    以为这把伞是我的!」


    胖猪

    有一个顽皮的男生给同班的一位女生取外号叫胖猪,该女生哭着告到老师那里,老师
    答应对该男生进行批评教育。第二天上课,老师在班上讲话:我们班里有位同学太没
    有礼貌了,随便给别的同学起外号,总不能人家象啥就叫啥吧。



    路标

    一司机大雾天晚上迷了路,隐隐约约看见路边有一个路标,就把车停崴下来。可是雾
    太大,怎么也看不见写的什么字。于是决定爬上去看看。好不容易爬到顶上,终于看
    清上面的字:油漆未干。



    记忆深刻

    母女二人去参观女儿男朋友的画展。母亲发现其中一幅裸体人像酷似女儿,便问道:
    你没有光着身子给他画吧。啊,没有,女儿答,他是凭记忆画的。



    吵驾

    居委会大妈:小孩,大冷天你一个人站在门口干什么,怎么不在屋里待着?
    小孩:爸爸,妈妈在吵架。
    居委会大妈:不象话,你爸爸是谁?
    小孩:这就是他们吵架的原因。


    春耕忙!

    某知青点,插队者是一批音乐学院学生,平时不闻丝弦声。忽一日,公社组织宣传队,
    广大贫下中农对再教育对象表示信任,派他们登台表演。
    幕启,英姿飒爽的报幕员道:下一个节目,小提琴合奏《贝多芬想念红太阳》。全场
    掌声雷动。贝多芬既然想念红太阳,准是个无产阶级革命派。音乐学院学生们堂而皇
    之演奏一段老贝的《f大调浪漫曲》。继而,准备演奏比才的《斗牛士之歌》。报幕
    员介绍说:下一个节目,《全世界贫下中农春耕忙》。



    生日

    经理甲与经理乙是好朋友,某日,他俩聚在一起。经理乙见经理甲神情沮丧,便询问
    发生何事。经理甲叹气道:“昨天是我生日,我的女秘书请我去她家给我庆祝生日。”
    “那不是很好吗?”“到了她家,她让我在客厅先等一会儿,五分钟后进卧室找她。
    说要给我一个惊喜。”“那不是更好吗?生日交上桃花远了。”“我当时也是这么想
    的。可五分钟后我走进卧室,发现我的女秘书和其他职员都在里面,捧着生日蛋糕等
    着我呢。”“这也不错呀,你的职员都很爱戴你,你应该高兴才是。”“可当时我是
    脱光了衣服之后才进去的。”



    男朋友

    问:为什麽在美国这麽难找到亲切体贴的男朋友?
    答:因为他们都有男朋友了




    一次某位诗人和一位将军同为宴会的上宾。女主人极力要向人们显示并炫耀她对诗的
    造诣有多深。她宣布说:我这位诗人朋友现在要为我作一首十四行诗,并当场朗诵。
    哦,不,这位诗人推辞说,还是让这位将军来发一枚大炮吧!


    老鼠妈妈带着一群小老鼠大步走过厨房地板,这时突然跳出来一只猫。猫叫:咪呜!
    咪呜!老鼠妈妈也回叫:咪呜!咪呜!被弄糊涂的猫走了,老鼠妈妈对它的小老鼠们
    说:你们看,我没说错吧!我告诉过你们多学一种外语总是有用的。


    心理医生问病人:你是否听到一些声音,但却不知道谁在讲话,也不知道声音从哪里
    传来?
    是的。
    那是什么时候发生这种情形?
    我去接电话的时候。




    一栋公寓的一扇窗户上写着:转让小号
    而隔壁一家的窗户上写着:感谢上帝



    鼠妈妈抓着鼠儿子的手,飞奔逃避後面穷追的恶猫。就在接近鼠洞口时,恶猫正准备
    蓄势一扑,势在必得。在这危机当前,千钧一发时,鼠妈回过头来叫声:汪汪恶猫一
    愣,鼠家趁这当儿安全回洞!惊魂埔定的鼠妈妈语重心长的告诉鼠儿说:这会儿!你
    知道外国话的重要性了吧??


    钥匙

    话说十字军东征的时候有一位士兵老乔为了怕老婆出轨就用当时最流行的贞操带将她
    锁起来,又怕自己弄丢钥匙,於是便把钥匙交给他最信任的朋友保管。
    出发的那一天,部队走了一哩多,只见他的朋友急急忙忙从後面赶上,气喘嘘嘘地问
    他:老乔,你没搞错吧!这支钥匙根本打不开呀?


    关税

    大傻入境某国时,带了只八哥,海关人员叫住他说:
    『先生!你这只八哥也得付税金。』
    『应该付多少啊?』
    『活的50美元,如果是标本就只要15美元!』
    此时听见那只八哥嘶哑的叫着:
    『大傻!千万别吝啬啊!』


    三个愿望

    从前有一位常被老婆打而又非常怕老婆的人;某天在被老婆打完之後,非常郁卒地跑
    到外面散心。正常他心情非常不好的时候,上帝受到他的感召,出现在他的面前。上
    帝说:「我可以给你三个愿望,但是yourwife将会比你的愿望多一倍」於是
    某人便说:「我希望很有钱。」突然间在他的身旁出现了许许多多的钱,但相对地h
    iswife比他多了一倍的钱;这时他又说了第二个愿望:「我希望更有钱。」这
    时他的身边又出现了更多的钱,但hiswife却出现更多更多的钱。这时上帝便
    说:「你还有一个愿望,赶快说出来吧!」此人想了又想,最後带着些许沮丧地对着
    上帝说:「请你把我打个半死吧!」


    爸爸

    一位孤苦无依的孕妇昏倒在一所医院门口,被医师救了进去,她即将临盆却又难产,
    医师帮她生下一个男婴而母亲不治死亡,临终前她恳求医师一定要帮她的小孩找到一
    户人家收养,医师想了一下终於点头答应了。
    同一个时间有一位神父因为肚子里长了一颗寻常狯到医院来割除,医师就骗他说他生
    了一个小孩,神父很高兴地说:真是上帝的赐与。便把小孩抱回去抚养;时间一过就
    是二十年,小婴孩终於长大成人,神父却一病不起,他自觉不久於人世,有一天就把
    那孩子叫到床前说:儿呀!我快要死了,有件事你一定要知道,其实我不是你真正的
    爸爸…我是你妈,你真正的爸爸就是隔壁教区的那个神父…



    男:我好喜欢你喔…我真的很喜欢你…我可不可以亲亲你?。
    女:不要脸…。
    男:那我亲嘴好了…。



    话说成大胜八十八相送离情依依时间又接近十一点半啦一男一女紧紧拥抱难割难舍剩
    五分钟剩四分钟……………再忠贞的爱情也无法阻止宿舍的关门两只紧握的双手终於
    被分开啦在女生踏进宿舍的第一步时男孩鼓起勇气大声说我。还…有…三…个…字…
    没…跟…你…说全胜八舍胜一舍胜九舍的男男女女都探头出来啦胜八门前依依不舍的
    情侣包括警卫先生全都秉气凝神等待那人类史上最感人肺府深叩人心的三个字一切喧
    杂都忽化为沉静只见那男的大声说早……点……睡



    绘画的原因

    湖边,一个画家正在画画,身后来了一男一女两口子。他们看了一会儿,最后丈夫以
    无可辩驳的口吻对妻子说:“看见了吧,亲爱的,不买一个相机,该有多苦恼哇!”


    原来如此

    一对年轻夫妇去看画展。妻子是一个高度近视眼,她站在一幅大画前仔细地看了老半
    天,然后大声地喊了起来:"我的天哪!这位妇人为何如此难看?""亲爱的,别大
    惊小怪,"丈夫连忙走上前去悄悄地告述妻子:"这不是画,是镜子”。



    我闹了一个笑话

    上星期五我闹了一个笑话。我去伦敦买了点东西。我是去买圣诞节礼物的,也想为我
    大学的专业课找几本书(由此可见我是个学生)。那天我是乘早班车去伦敦的,中午
    刚过不久我要买的都买好了。我不怎么喜欢呆在伦敦,太嘈杂,交通也太挤,此外那
    晚上我已经作好了安排,于是我便打乘出租汽车去滑铁卢车站。说实在的,我本来坐
    不起出租车,只是那天我想赶3:30的火车回去。不巧碰上交通堵塞,等我到火车
    站时,那趟车刚开走了。我只好呆了一个小时等下趟车。我买了一份“旗帜”晚报,
    漫步走进车站的校┰部。在一天的这个时候校┰部里几乎空无一人,我要了一杯咖啡
    和一包饼干——巧克力饼干。我很喜欢这种饼干。空座位有的是,我便找了一个靠窗
    的。我坐下来开始做报上登载的纵横填字游戏。我觉得做这种游戏很有趣。
    过了几分钟来了一个人坐在我对面,这个人除了个子很高之外没有什么特别的地方。
    可以说他样子很象一个典型的城里做生意的人——穿一身暗色衣服,带一个公文包。
    我没说话,继续做我的填字游戏。忽然他伸过手来,打开我那包饼干,拿了一块在他
    咖啡里蘸了一下就送进嘴里。我简直难以相信自己的眼睛!我吃惊得说不出话来。不
    过我也不想大惊小怪,于是决定不予理会。我总是尽量避免惹麻烦。我也就拿了一块
    饼干,再回去做我的填字游戏。
    这人拿第二块饼干时我既没抬头也没吱声。我假装对游戏特别感兴趣。过了几分钟我
    不在意地伸出手去,拿来最后一块饼干,瞥了这人一眼。他正对我怒目而视。我有点
    紧张地把饼干放进嘴里,决定离开。正当我准备站起身来走的时候,那人突然把椅子
    往后一推,站起来匆匆走了。我感到如释重负,准备呆两三分钟再走。我喝完咖啡,
    摺好报纸站起身来。这时我突然发现就在桌上我原来放报纸的地方摆着我的那包饼干。



    飞机

    在某一次军事演习中,某小队奉命在指定地点等待直升飞机的到来,但是,飞机始终
    未到。这时,队长看见一老妇在田里种菜。于是,他上前询问。为了让老妇明白,他
    说:大娘,您看到一只铁鸟飞过吗?大娘想了想,说:铁鸟没看到,直升飞机到是看
    到过一架。


    安全带

    空姐向乘客广播:“女士们,先生们,请扣好安全带。飞机马上就要起飞。”飞机起
    飞后,喇叭里又传来空姐的声音。“请将安全带扣紧一些。很抱歉,今天的早餐,我
    们忘记装上飞机了。”


    有一位计程车司机开车开的很快,他车上的乘客很怕,就请他开慢些,那司机就说:
    安啦!我大哥也是这样子开计程车,都开了十几年了也没什麽事…然後计程车跟旁边
    开跑车的人尬起车来,
    乘客又很害怕,请他不要跟人家尬车,那司机又说:安啦!我大哥也是这样子开计程
    车,都开了十几年了也没什麽事後来司机又频频闯红灯,那乘客又很害怕,请他不要
    再闯红灯,那司机又说:安啦!我大哥也是这样子开计程车,都开了十几年了也没什
    麽事…忽然,来到了一个十字路口,前面是绿灯,那司机忽然煞车停崴下来,那乘客
    就很好奇的问说:为什麽你现在反而要停下来?那司机就尴尬的说:没有啦,就是怕
    我大哥从红灯那边闯了过来


    mann:园游会时某一系摊位推出一种饮料名字叫心痛的感觉只见到某仁兄雀雀欲
    试的掏出50元给老板之後老板递给他一杯白开水…

    officer:我曾在园游会上点了份温柔的慈悲(120元)结果却是一小瓷杯
    的乌龙茶杯上写着温柔二字…


    聪明的鹦鹉

    有个人买了一只鹦鹉,想让它学会文明用语,于是每天早晨经过它时都说,早安。话
    说这天早上他精神不太好,经过它时什么也没说,鸟儿冷冷地瞪着他说,喂,你今天
    怎么啦?


    自信的老祖父

    老祖父上卫生间的时候,地震了,当人们把他从废墟中挖出来的时候,他哈哈大笑着,
    太有思了,我一拉马桶,房子就倒了


    一位看上去很有魅力的女子坐在酒吧里,一位男士走过去说请问这儿有人吗,女子脸
    上开始呈现出迷惑不解的表情,什么,去汽车旅馆?男士重复了一遍问题,女子报以
    同样的回答,男士觉得气呼呼,但是没有说什么,回到自己位置上坐下了。过了一会
    儿,女子到男士桌边说,对不起,我是学心理学的,在研究人们遇到莫名其妙的回答
    时会有什么表情。男士高声地反问道,什么,要一百美元?


    斜眼的法官

    三个犯人坐在一个斜眼的法官面前。
    法官威严地问道,你叫什么名字比尔,第二个犯人老老实实地答道。
    我没有问你!法官咆哮着。可是我什么也没说呀,第三个犯人委屈地答道。


    口气相同

    几杯酒一下肚,他飘飘欲仙地走到一位妇人身后挽起了她的胳膊:“请跳个舞。”当
    妇人回头时,他说:“对不起,我以为你是我老婆。”“我为她感到遗憾,”妇人生
    气道,“你是一个典型的不称职的丈夫。”“真怪,”他吃惊道,“你甚至连说话口
    气也像我老婆。”


    剑术

    世界剑术表演大会上,排名第三的剑手首先出场。工作人员放出一只苍蝇,剑手快速
    一挥,就把苍蝇劈为两半,全场掌声雷动。接着排名第二的剑手把苍蝇劈为四份。这
    时全场鸦雀无声人们静侯全世界最伟大的剑手表演。只见他运剑成风,剑锋直向苍蝇
    劈下,但是那只苍蝇如故。最伟大的剑手竟然完全没有劈中目标,全场观众大惊失色,
    可是剑手依然满脸笑容。有人喊道:“你有什么可以得意的?你失手了!”剑手回答:
    “你们看仔细一些,苍蝇还活着,可是它永远不能做父亲了。”


    证据

    律师质问交通警察:“一个人跪在马路中间就能证明他是喝醉酒了吗?”“当然不能,
    先生,”交通警察回答,“可是这位先生跪在马路中间要把涂在马路中央的那条白线
    卷起来。”


    应聘表演

    保镖公司前来应聘的人排成了长龙,主考为了尽快选到他们满意的人,便叫有特殊才
    能的出来表演他们的拿手绝活。出来的人分别表演了拳击、泰拳、空手道、中国功夫
    以及剑术、射击等。轮到最后一位,他却站着不动。“先生,您还等什么?”主考问。
    “对不起各位,我是操纵原子弹的。”那人说。


    不早说

    一天,一醉汉走出波特曼酒店,上了出租车,对司机说:“希尔顿饭店,8楼818
    房间。”途中,司机发现醉汉把衣服一件一件全脱下了,便说:“先生,还没到你的
    房间呢!”醉汉一听恼火了:“你为什么不早说呢?刚才我已经把皮鞋脱在门外了!


    醉汉

    一天,一醉汉走出波特曼酒店,上了出租车,对司机说了声“上波特曼。”便呼呼睡
    去。司机一楞,忙推醒醉汉说:“你现在就在波特曼啊。”醉汉听罢,即掏钱递给司
    机,说:“不用找了。”下车前,又关切地对司机说:“以后开车别太快,危险。”


    红墨水

    听说西伯利亚条件不错,两名俄罗斯工人伊凡和鲍斯商量到那里当建筑工。因担心受
    骗,伊凡先去,鲍斯等他音讯再做决定。起程前,俩人约好:如信是用蓝墨水写的,
    说的就是真话;用红墨水,就不要信以为真了。
    一个月后,伊凡来信了,鲍斯很高兴,因为信是用蓝墨水写的:
    亲爱的鲍斯:
    这里的情况很好,超级市场里什么都有,香肠、中肉等多种肉类一应俱全。每天清晨
    还有新鲜面包和中奶供应,衣服也很便宜,就是只有一样东西缺货,我买不到红墨水!


    迟到原因

    经常迟到的珍妮,今天又迟到了。不过,珍妮的妈妈让她带了一张纸条给经理,上面
    写着:“很抱歉,我女儿经常迟到。这是因为我家有三个妙龄女郎,而镜子却只有一
    面。”


    因人而异

    佛雷把刚买的高尔夫球用具拿给朋友看:“我和太太都胖了一点,医生说主要是运动
    量不足,为此我准备加入高尔夫俱乐部。”“那你太太呢?”“我已买了一部剪草机
    给她。”


    猫价浮动

    在市场上,一位顾客问:“喂!这只猫多少钱?”
    “先生,100法郎。”
    “可昨天您只要20法郎。”
    “因为今天早晨它吃了我家一只价值80法郎的鹦鹉。”


    为时已晚

    直到结了婚,我才知道什么是真正的幸福。但可惜的是为时已晚了。



    验证

    詹金斯先生和他的妻子在吃早餐时,为家庭琐事互不相让而大吵起来。“你不会料理
    家务,也从不为别人着想。犴外,你在床上的表现也太差劲了!”丈夫气愤地奚落道。
    说完,他气乎乎地拿着公事包去上班了。中午,詹金斯先生有些后悔,觉得不该讲那
    些话来伤害妻子。于是,他拨通了家里的电话。可是铃声一直在响,却没有人接。就
    在詹金斯先生打算挂断电话时,他妻子才拎起了听筒。“你怎么这么长时间才接电话?”
    丈夫问。“我正在床上呢,”妻子懒洋洋地回答。“现在你在床上于什么?”丈夫接
    着又问。“我正在验证你早晨说的那一句话呢!”妻子回答。


    单行道

    某日某先生骑着机车在路上,突然被警察拦下来。这位先生不但不紧张反而非常兴奋,
    因为他身上带满证件,因此车子一停下来马上将证件拿给警察…。
    先生:驾照,行照……
    警察:疑?…。喔……。
    先生:可以走了吗?…被临检的感觉真爽。
    警察:先生…这是单行道……


    苍蝇的命运

    有三个人:美国人,中国人,犹太人……一起喝饮料…
    突然,有苍蝇挥入了三人的饮料中……。
    美国人叫侍者过来,重新换上一杯。
    中国人二话不说,喝下企…。
    犹太人抓起苍蝇放在桌上,说:吐出来,把你喝下企的饮料吐出来……


    企业家

    一个成功的企业家告诉他的孩子说:
    一个成功的人要具备诚信与智慧两个必要条件。
    子:什麽是诚信呢?
    父:诚信就是明知明天要破产,今天也要把货送到客户的手上。
    子:那什麽是智慧呢?
    父:不要作出这种傻事!!!



    你瞎了吗????

    在繁荣的市区发生交通意外,两辆小轿车迎面相撞。
    其中一位司机怒气冲冲大叫∶『你瞎了吗?』
    另一位司机不甘被辱,反唇相讥∶『谁说的?我不是把你撞个正着吗?


    刚学会骑机车的年轻人不小心骑车撞到一个老阿婆
    年轻人:阿婆对不起喔!我不大会骑…。
    阿婆:不大会骑还撞这麽准!

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

  4. BlogIcon Bears Cutler Nike Jersey 2013.02.25 17:40 신고

    Robert Griffin III couldn't run, at least not in any way resembling his usual sprints through the line and into open turf. Robert Griffin III couldn't throw, at least not the deep darts that move the chains and keep defenses honest.

    Robert Griffin III couldn't lead the Washington Redskins' offense, not after his knee buckled in the first quarter of this NFC wild-card game against Seattle. A couple plays later Washington took a two-touchdown lead but the deal was done. It would gain just 41 yards over the next two and a half futile quarters with Griffin as quarterback, all but assuring Seattle's 24-14 victory.

    Robert Griffin III couldn't do much of anything Sunday except lie, which is what he's been trained to do in situations like this.

    Lie to himself that he can still deliver like no backup could. Lie to his coach that this was nothing big. Lie to the doctors who tried to assess him in the swirl of a playoff sideline.
    Robert Griffin was a shell of himself in Sunday's loss to the Seahawks. (AP)
    So Robert Griffin III lied, which is to be excused because this is a sport that rewards toughness in the face of common sense, a culture that celebrates the warrior who is willing to leave everything on the field, a business that believes such lies are part of the road to greatness.
    [Related: Twitter reaction to decision on RG3]

    "I'm the quarterback, it doesn't matter what percentage I am, " Griffin reasoned later. "If you can play, you play. "

    First off, that's a cliché. Second, he couldn't play. Not well enough to win the game anyway.

    And with each snap there was the risk of not just further injuring that valuable knee, but of being injured in a different way because he was no longer capable of defending himself by avoiding a hit in the pocket or scrambling away from a linebacker.

    "I did put myself at more risk being out there, " Griffin said.

    At least that was the truth, although he quickly reverted into more clichés.

    "But every time you step on the football field between those lines you're putting your life, your career [and] every single ligament in your body in jeopardy, " RG3 said.

    [Related: Doctor disputes Mike Shanahan on RG3's knee]

    Of course you can be injured at any moment. You can really get injured at any moment though when you can no longer move around and avoid hits.

    It was all a lie and that's why rookie quarterbacks aren't supposed to make the call. Coaches are.

    Griffin didn't have a coach Sunday.

    He had Mike Shanahan, who looked at this mess, looked at each hapless Redskins drive, looked at every painful RG3 step, looked at every awkward, overthrown pass, and instead bought Griffin's weak arguments and then closed his eyes and lied to himself that it would all turn out OK.

    Except it didn't. Not on the scoreboard. And not in Griffin's knee, which was eventually done in when he wasn't even capable of bending over and scooping up an errant snap in the fourth quarter. Instead a world-class athlete awkwardly reached until his right knee hyper-extended underneath him.

    He wound up in a heap on the turf, clutching that knee while Seattle recovered a gift fumble that led to an easy, game-clinching field goal.

    It was the final proof that he never should've been out there. And finally, too late, his day was done.


    The NFL world is second-guessing Mike Shanahan. (USA Today)"If you don't pull him out then, you should get fired, " Shanahan said.

    Washington was in desperate need of such common sense long before that. It was desperate for Shanahan to pat this eager-to-please wunderkind on the back, show him the bench and insert the very capable backup, Kirk Cousins.

    Not just for the future of the franchise, although that would be enough. The Redskins needed it for the present opportunity to win Sunday's game.

    Instead it got silly discussions.

    "I talked to Robert and he said to me, 'Coach, there's a difference between being injured and being hurt, ' " Shanahan relayed later. "He said, 'I can guarantee I'm hurt right now but give me the chance to win this football game because I guarantee I'm not injured. '

    "That, " Shanahan said, "was enough for me. "

    That, Shanahan should've realized, was just a young player repeating another baseless cliché he probably picked up from a grainy NFL Films voiceover set to soaring symphonic music, http://www.eshopfalcons.com/ Falcons Matt Ryan Game Jersey.

    [Photos: Rough outing for RG3, Redskins]

    Shanahan acknowledged later that, "I'll probably second-guess myself" and for that he deserves a measure of credit. He wasn't defiant about blowing it on Sunday.

    Still, this wasn't some snap decision in the heat of the moment. This played out over hours, with a halftime even built in the middle. There were five consecutive series of futility for a 60-year-old coach to start trusting his own eyes rather buying the b. s. of a 22-year-old.

    "He said to me, 'Trust me, I want to be in there and I deserve to be in there, '" Shanahan said. "And I couldn't disagree with him. "

    Shanahan is paid to disagree with him. That's his job.

    At one point in the fourth quarter Shanahan decided he wanted to test if RG3 could still run, calling for a simple QB keeper. It was, on paper, effective, a 9-yard gain to the left. To see the play, however, was to see one of the greatest rushing machines in the league hobble to the outside, his knee practically wobbling on each step. It was strong blocking and the element of surprise that made it work.

    "I asked him about it at that time, " Shanahan said. "He said, 'Coach, I could've run faster. Nobody was there. I got [9] yards. That's not too bad. I promise if I have to do it again I could go faster.

    "He gave me the right answer. "

    That's only because Shanahan was asking the wrong question. Which is to say he wasn't asking any questions at all.

    On and on Shanahan's media conference went. The coach even unwittingly explained why he kept hearing the same answers from Griffin, when he took time to praise the very heart and fight of this prodigy and declared that a player who refuses to leave a game is "the type of player that you want. " It's a circle of nonsense.

    Shanahan was already hit with accusations Sunday from Dr. James Andrews, the famed sports surgeon, about Griffin's original injury against Baltimore on Dec. 9. Shanahan previously claimed that he put RG3 back in that game only because Andrews cleared the player. Andrews disputed that, saying the quarterback wouldn't even let the doctor examine him and he never blessed the return.
    An MRI on Monday will determine the extent of Robert Griffin III's knee injury. (AP)
    "It wasn't our opinion, " Andrews told USA Today. "We didn't even get to touch him or talk to him. Scared the hell out of me. "

    Shanahan seemed to blame it all on miscommunication but it spoke to a sideline in disarray. The player is brushing off doctors? The coach is inventing conversations to the media? Who exactly is in charge around here?

    As for the extent of Griffin's latest injury, who knows at this point? An MRI is scheduled Monday. At first Griffin said it didn't feel any worse than the December injury. Then after the game, as things stiffened, he admitted it might be worse.

    "I don't know how bad it is, " he said.

    He didn't know after the game. He didn't know in the game. He isn't supposed to know. He is, as the football system taught him well, supposed to lie to his coach and prove to his teammates that he's indestructible and invincible.

    So Robert Griffin III did his job Sunday, only to have Mike Shanahan not do his.

    And now Washington can only hope a playoff loss was the worst thing that happened because of it.

  5. 1. 今天是感恩节...向在我生命中,

    陪伴守侯或只是路过的每一个朋友说声:

    *谢谢!*感谢你给我带来的欢乐和一切...

    感谢你们让我相信:我是幸福的!!


    这是我昨天收到的第一条短信息,是它告诉我这是怎样一个日子。生活在并不忙碌带着几许无聊又几许无奈的我,并没有在意这是一个什么特别的日子。感谢这位朋友的提醒,感谢所有的朋友对我的关心,我会好好的活着,努力地过好每一天!!



    2. 生命中有许多值得感谢,

    在这个本身就值得感谢的日子里

    想对你说:Thanks giving my friend


    真的,因为感恩节,一个我从来都没有在意过的西方的节日,让我觉得生命中有许多值得感谢,在远离了大家朝夕相处了四年的朋友之后,我才发现在那么多的感动就在平实的日子里,在我们不经意之间溜走了。很想大声的说:让我在来一次吧。


    3. 烟花的一瞬是快乐

    流星的一瞬是祈愿

    思念的一瞬是感动

    而我只想让你在看到短信的一瞬明白:

    我是真的祝你一生幸福!!


    也许,所有的朋友都是在祝愿自己的,所以一定要自己让自己快乐起来,幸福起来!!



    4. 风起时,

    落叶载上灵魂,

    在秋日温暖的光芒里穿梭,

    赞美太阳,

    赞美此生得赐的身边的和远方的朋友,

    感恩节快乐!

    多么诗意一条短信啊!让我觉得很温馨,让你觉得温馨了没有?


    5. 主耶稣的感恩福音:

    要对人好,

    要对给你发短信的人好,

    要常请她吃饭,

    常买礼物给她,

    将你身上罪恶的钱给她。

    主耶稣爱你,阿门

    并祝感恩节快乐!!


    这是一条很有意思的短信,我把它作为我感恩节的代言发给了许多朋友,希望他(她)们收到短信时会会意地一笑。

    还有来自许多来自朋友和亲人祝福的短信,让我知道大家其实都在一起,大家都在互相鼓励,所以我也要加油,不断地努力,过好每一天!让每一天丰富起来!

    向帮助过我的朋友和我所爱的朋友说声感谢,感谢你走进我的生命,让我的生命丰富而又美丽,我愿我有生的时光,带给你无限的快乐。感恩节快乐!

    A lot of people will walk in and out of your life but only true friends will leave footprints in your heart! Today is Thanksgiving Day! Happy Thanksgiving Day!

    Maybe one day we will apart, maybe one day you will walk out my life, but you will always in my heart! Brother Forever! Happy Thanksgiving Day, Dear brother!

    43 谁言寸草心,报得三春晖!
    42 感谢的话毋宁多言,总之,你是我一生的知己好友!
    41 谢了,哥们,下次有事儿别忘了找我!
    40 给你添了太多的麻烦,真是不好意思!
    39 我不知道说什么才好,除了谢谢。
    38 谢谢你和我同舟共济!
    37 谢谢你帮我,祝你快乐,愿你岁岁平安,事事如意。
    36 你虽然两次救了我的命,但那都是你自己愿意的,我可没求你。既然我不领你的情,自然也不必说好听的话拍你马屁。
    35 衷心谢谢你为我所做的一切!
    34 懒得客气地来和你说谢谢,咱们到哪个馆子里撮一顿,唠唠嗑,如何?
    33 大恩大德,铭记在心。
    32 您的恩情,我没齿难忘。
    31 结草衔环,以报大恩大德。
    30 千言万语,表达不了我的感激之情,我只能说,我已铭记在心。
    29 患难见真知,谢谢你帮我度过难关!
    28 滴水之恩, http://www.csnKnicks.com/ Free shipping Anthony Knicks White Jersey,来日我当涌泉相报。
    27 你的帮助无异于雪中送炭,让我感激涕零!
    26 谢谢你帮我,祝你快乐,愿你岁岁平安,事事如意。

    1.今天是感恩节。我要感谢那些帮助过我以及我所爱的朋友们。感谢你们走进我的生命,让我的生命变得完整而有意义。我愿意用我的有生带给你开心与快乐!

    2.知道什么样的人最快乐吗?心怀感激快乐的人。所以我是快乐的感谢上帝让我拥有你这样的好朋友!不管冬日多寒冷,想到你就让我看到温暖的阳光!感恩节快乐!:)

    3.感谢上帝让我们相遇,感谢你我共同经历的日子,感谢你让我的生命的天空如此美丽,对这一切的一切只有对你说:感恩节快乐!我爱你!

    让我怎样感谢你,当我走向你的时候,我原想收获一缕春风,你却给了我整个春天。
    因为有了太阳,大地万物自由生长.因为有了月亮,夜晚不再暗淡无光.因为有了星星,天空不再辽远空旷.因为有了你的陪伴,我变的幸福快乐.只想说谢谢"

    1.感谢上帝给了我牛奶,给了我面包,给了我一切,我爱你……上帝 感恩节

    2.我不会说什么话,只想对你说我也会帮助别人 感恩节

    3.给你添了太多的麻烦,真是不好意思! 感恩节

    4.大恩大德,铭记在心。 感恩节

    5.你的帮助无异于雪中送炭,让我感激涕零! 感恩节

    6.我不知道说什么才好,除了谢谢。 感恩节

    7.感谢的话毋宁多言,总之,你是我一生的知己好友! 感恩节

    8.衷心谢谢你为我所做的一切! 感恩节

    9.谢谢你帮我,祝你快乐,愿你岁岁平安,事事如意 感恩节

    10.千言万语,表达不了我的感激之情,我只能说,我已铭记在心。 感恩节

    11.让我怎样感谢你,当我走向你的时候,我原想收获一缕春风,你却给了我整个春天。

    12、今天是十一月第4个星期四,又是一个感恩节来临了,我发了如下短信给我的朋...

    13、你小子大清早找死啊?(555,好暴力,我只是祝你节日快乐而已)

    14、感恩节?是要吃火鸡的那个感恩节?你不是要我请你吃火鸡吧,很贵也。(-_...

    15、把信息给我原封不动发回,后面加了一句“也祝你快乐”

    16、今天真的是感恩节吗?下班我要早点去买好吃的,回去和家里人大吃一顿。

    17、我请你吃饭!最好多带两个漂亮妹妹来!感恩节,快乐哦

    18、你的帮助无异于雪中送炭,让我感激涕零!

    19、滴水之恩,来日我当涌泉相报。

    20、患难见真知,谢谢你帮我度过难关!

    21、千言万语,表达不了我的感激之情,我只能说,我已铭记在心。

    22、结草衔环,以报大恩大德。

    23、懒得客气地来和你说谢谢,咱们到哪个馆子里撮一顿,唠唠嗑,如何?

    24、你虽然两次救了我的命,但那都是你自己愿意的,我可没求你。既然我不领你的...

    25、感谢的话毋宁多言,总之,你是我一生的知己好友!

    26、谢了,哥们,下次有事儿别忘了找我!

    27、让我怎样感谢你,当我走向你的时候,我原想收获一缕春风,你却给了我整个春...

    28、不好意思,在你报答我之前,能不能先告诉我什么是感恩节?


      Warm wishes at Thanksgiving.

      在感恩节,衷心地祝福你们。

      From all of us to all of you at Thanksgiving.

      我们全体祝你们感恩节快乐。

      Thanksgiving wishes for you and your family.

      给你们全家感恩节的祝福。

      I wish you could be here on Thanksgiving.

      但愿你能来过感恩节。

      Thanksgiving just won't be the same without you.

      没有你,感恩节就不会一样了。

      This will be our first Thanksgiving apart.

      这将是我们第一次不在一起过感恩节。

      It will be sad not to see you during the holiday when families get together.

      家人团聚的节日里,不能看到你,我会感到难过。

      Our first Thanksgiving should be our best.

      我们第一次共度的感恩节是我们最美好的时光。

      I wouldn't want to spend Thanks-giving with anyone else.

      我只愿和你共度感恩节。

      What a wonderful time to be together.

      在一起的时光多么快乐。

      Thanksgiving is a time when I tell you that I love you.

      感恩节就是我告诉你我爱你的时候。

      Thanksgiving is a great time to tell you that we love you kids.

      孩子们,感恩节这时刻,我们要说:我们都爱你们。

      Thanksgiving is the best holiday of the year.

      感恩节是一年中最好的节日。

      I love to eat, so I love Thanksgiving.

      我爱吃,所以我爱感恩节。

      I hope you are feeling thankful after your supper.

      希望你吃过晚饭后有感恩的心情。

      I am getting hungry just thinking about it.

      一想到它我就饿了。

      I will be home for Thanksgiving, so save a little turkey for me.

      我会回家过感恩节,所以请留点儿火鸡给我。

  6. 聞くところによると、高価格の航油今はもう航空会社のコストの中で最大の一部, http://www.drebeatsale.com/beats-by-dre-studio-nfl-chicago-bears-headphones-p-78.html Beats By Dre Studio NFL Chicago Bears Headphones.4月6日引き上げ燃料油付加に時間もかかるので、分析を示し、イースタン航空国航、南方航空の三大国の航空会社があるの航油コストも超えて総コストの40%.



    は日午前に引き上げると発表しまし25四川航空燃油サーチャージ後、数時間以内に中国国際航空、中国南方航空などの航空会社が相次いで発表まで同じ幅のお知らせ.これは今年以来燃油サーチャージの第三回引き上げ、これまで中国海南航空、キャセイパシフィック航空など、会社は5月1日上がった国際線燃油サーチャージ.








    今回引き上げ後、国内線80、140元の燃油サーチャージ徴収基準に達している歴史第2位.最高の時間帯には2008年7月1日から12月24日、当時の課税標準を80と150元.










    四川航空公式サイト25日午前に発表通知による航空燃料総合調達コストを引き上げ、5月26日午前0時から再び引き上げ国内線燃油サーチャージ徴収基準800キロ(含む)以下航路はもとの60元調整を80元、800キロ航は110元以上を調整する140元.同日午後、各航空会社がそのオフィシャルサイトで発表引き上げ燃油サーチャージ, http://www.drebeatsale.com/beats-dr-dre-studio-kobe-bryant-headphone-p-96.html Beats Dr Dre Studio Kobe Bryant Headphone.

  7. BlogIcon 全讯网 2013.03.26 13:28 신고

    大乐透第13018期预测:奇偶比看好4:1
    13017期大乐透开奖号码,前区:11、14、22、29、34。前区大小比:三大二小, http://www.gg.mu 皇冠网,奇偶比:二奇三偶,质合比:2:3,和值:110,三区间比:1:2:2,012路比:0:2:3,跨度:23,后区开奖号:05、11,后区和值:16,大小比:1:1,奇偶比:2:0,质合比:2:0,跨度:6,012路比:0:0:2。
    13018期大乐透预测:
    前区推荐:
    第一位:01、04、05
    第二位:10、12、13
    第三位:13、19、21
    第四位:22、23、25
    第五位:27、28、31
    奇偶比:4:1
    大小比:3:2
    胆码:01 13 27
    三区间比:1:3:1
    和值范围:100-133
    跨度:30、24
    单注推荐:
    05,12,21,22,27
    05,13,19,22,28
    04,10,21,25,28
    05,10,19,22,28
    01,13,19,25,27
    01,12,13,25,28
    05,12,19,23,28
    05,12,13,22,27
    04,13,19,25,31
    05,13,21,23,28(投注网)


밴드에서 드럼의 의미는 무엇일까요?
음악의 가장 기본이 될 수 있는 비트를 만들어주는 역할을 하는 위치가 바로 드럼입니다.
근데 무대에서 웃음을 줄 수도 있다는 걸 다음 동영상을 보고 알았습니다.

유튜브에 "This drum is at the wrong gig" 라는 제목으로 인기를 끌고 있는 동영상인데요.



이 동영상에서 주목 할 만한 것은 바로 뒤의 드러머입니다.
눈감고 소리만 들으면 눈치를 못 채지만 뒤에서 드럼치는 드러머를 보시면 웃음이 날겁니다.


대락 이런 느낌으로 드럼을 연주하는데요.
저런 퍼포먼스를 보여주면서도 드럼의 비트가 흐트러지지 않는게 신기하기만 하네요.

이 밴드의 이름은 "Rick K. and the AllNighters" 입니다.
밴드 이름을 몰라서 한참 찾았는데, 동영상을 잘 보면 드러머 앞에 노란색으로 밴드 이름이 쓰여 있네요.


이 밴드의 홈페이지를 보니까.
저 드럼치시는 분은 원래 저런 컨셉으로 드럼을 치는 것 같습니다. ㅋㅋ

참고 링크
Rick K. and the Allnighters 공식 마이스페이스 -> [구경하기]

그 밖에 동영상들을 보아도 뒤쪽의 드러머만 눈에 띄네요.



이 동영상에선 음질이나 화질은 별로 안 좋지만 뒷쪽 드러머의 현란한 움직임은 확실히 볼 수 있네요.



이 동영상에선 시작부터 현란하네요.



이 동영상에선 춤을 추십니다. ㅋㅋ

개인적으로 이 밴드 한국에 한번 왔으면 좋겠네요.
마치 잭블랙이 생각나는 무대.. 왜 일까요?
그러고 보니 좀 닮은 듯? ㅋㅋ

아무튼 신기한 사람들 참 많은 것 같아요.


  1. Long before Jonathan Drouin stepped into the spotlight on hockey’s international stage, he had already won over Andre Tourigny as a fan.


    Jonathan Drouin was lighting it up for Halifax before joining Team Canada. (Getty)“His hockey sense and IQ is through the roof, ” said Tourigny, an assistant coach for Team Canada at the 2013 world juniors. “But along with that he’s a competitor, he wants to make the difference and he plays with a lot of poise.

    “I’m a big fan of Jo because I think he’s a player who will make the key play at the right moment. ”

    Tourigny, who coaches the Quebec Major Junior Hockey League’s Rouyn-Noranda Huskies, has seen the kind of effect Drouin can have on a game first hand. The 17-year-old has been a standout with the Halifax Mooseheads this season and has carried his dynamic play into a spot on Team Canada at the World Junior Hockey Championship. Last season in the QMJHL playoffs Drouin and linemate Nathan MacKinnon went on a tear, helping Halifax reach the semifinal where they lost in six games to the Rimouski Oceanic. Drouin finished his spring fling with nine goals and 26 points in 17 playoff games, only one point behind his friend MacKinnon.

    “He has the best hockey IQ I’ve coached against in the (QMJHL), ” said Tourigny, who has been behind the Huskies bench for nine seasons. “It’s unreal.

    “I’ve never coached against a guy like that. ”

    Tourigny said playing against Drouin is difficult because if you try to shut him down, he’ll just take his game to the next level. It’s his ability to always find an open man and make the right play that has made him a rising star on a team with older, more experienced players.

    The fact he was only playing midget hockey before moving to Halifax at Christmas last year has already been well documented, but it’s still hard to imagine his game could have progressed so fast in such a short time.

    “It’s fun to be here right now even though I’m 17, ” said Drouin, who is playing on Canada’s second line with Niagara IceDogs forwards Ryan Strome and Brett Ritchie (which has also earned time as the team’s second power-play unit). “It’s a really big step from last year when I was (playing) midget. I think I’m going to improve every game and help the team win. ”


    Nathan MacKinnon has been under the microscope longer - and more intensely - than Drouin. (Getty)He said he’s not concerned about his rising draft stock. He isn’t concerned about the media building up a rivalry between him and MacKinnon, who is also draft-eligible. MacKinnon has already spent so much time in the spotlight that Tourigny believes Drouin’s newfound fame will help ease the pressure off the Nova Scotia teenager many have touted to be the NHL’s top pick come June.

    “(Drouin) is in an easier situation than Nate, ” said Tourigny. “Nate is in a tough situation because he’s in the spotlight – he can’t fail. We’ve tried to talk to him about that, to ease that pressure. ”

    There’s a distinct double standard between the two players because MacKinnon has been under the hockey world’s microscope for so long. But, as Tourigny points out, the youngster isn’t the first phenom to go through this type of sometimes overwhelming scrutiny.

    “I remember Sean Couturier (now in the NHL with Philadelphia) two years ago, it was the same pattern. From the start he was targeted as the key guy, the top gun. Everyone was looking at him, and as soon as he made a mistake everybody would talk about it.

    “When a guy like Drouin makes a mistake, people say, ‘Oh, but he’s still good, so whatever. ’ So it’s kind of unfair for MacKinnon right now. ”

    Tourigny said that at the team’s selection camp in Calgary in December, he felt MacKinnon was under far more pressure to perform because the expectations for him have always been so high.

    “I had doubts about Nate because I knew that he would maybe try to do too much, ” said the coach. “Jo has that cockiness – in the right way – that confidence, that would make a difference. ”

    At the moment MacKinnon finds himself relegated to Canada’s fourth line which, for him, is unfamiliar territory given his stature in Halifax. MacKinnon said he’s OK with that, showing a level of maturity that often isn’t found with 17-year-olds.

    “At the end of the day it’s a tournament, http://www.csnclippers.com/ Clippers Caron Butler Men's Jersey, ” said the 17-year-old. “It’s not for individual success. For me I’m not worried about my draft status or anything like that. I’m just happy to be here.

    “Going from 25 (minutes) a night to less is definitely different, but we won 9-3 yesterday (against Germany) so we’re getting plenty of offence, ” said MacKinnon.

    He’s been rooming with Team Canada captain and NHLer Ryan Nugent-Hopkins, a conscious decision made by head coach Steve Spott since the two have had similar hockey paths.

    “He’s a mature guy, ” said MacKinnon of Nugent-Hopkins. “He’s very focused. It’s very nice to have him on our team for all the guys to learn from him. He was the best choice for captain as well. ”

    To be sure, Canada will be heavily scouted here with both MacKinnon and Drouin eligible for the 2013 NHL entry draft. But while the scouts gathered in Russia to watch and analyze the two teenagers, they insist they aren’t thinking that far ahead. In Ufa, they both have eyes on one prize.

    “I have one goal and that’s the gold medal right now, ” said Drouin.


 사람이 작업하는 분야 중에서 가장 다양하고 심오한 분야가 예술이 아닌가 생각 됩니다.
 인간이 다루는 모든 재료, 모든 것들이 예술의 재료가 될 수 있다고 해도 과언이 아닌데요.
 심지어는 쓸모없어 보이는 것도 예술가를 만나면 작품이 될 수 있습니다.

 이번에는 자동차 먼지와 예술가가 만나서 멋진 작품으로 탄생을 하였습니다.

진주귀걸이를 한 소녀


예를들면 위 그림과 같은 작품인데요.
어디서 많이 본 그림이죠?


바로 요하네스 베르미어의 '진주구걸이를 한 소녀'라는 작품입니다.
미술시간에 본 듯한 그림인데, 자동차 먼지를 이용해서 다시 보니 새롭네요.

위 작품은 텍사스 윔벌리에 사는 화가 스콧 웨이드의 작품인데, 그는 자동차에 끼인 먼지를 이용해서 '모나리자', '별이빛나는 밤에' 등 유명한 그림들을 그려 보였습니다.

그의 작품들을 더 살펴 보자면,

별이 빛나는 밤에를 배경으로 한 모나리자

산타

진주귀걸이를 한 소녀 작업 中

큰 바위 얼굴

텍사스 우먼

야생화



 차는 굉장히 더럽지만 보기만 해도 기분이 나쁜 더러워진 차를 이용해서 감탄을 자아내는 멋진 예술 품을 만드는게 신기하기만 합니다.





 스콧이 작업을 하는 과정이 유튜브에 동영상으로 올라왔는데요.
 자연적으로 생간 먼지가 아니라 일부러 먼지를 부착 시키고 작업을 시작합니다. ( 뭐 상관 없지요. 멋지니까 )
 일반 그림처럼 기본적인 스케치부터 시작하고 어찌어찌하다보면 그림이 완성되어 있습니다.
 굉장히 신기하네요.

 비록 비가오거나 바람이 세게 불면 망가지는 작품이지 그는 "사람들의 마음을 마사지 해주는 것"이라고 말하고 있습니다.
 멋지네요. 마치 밥 아저씨의 그림을 보고 있는 것 같습니다.


  1. BlogIcon 머니야 머니야 2010.07.06 10:06 신고

    와..첨보는 장면들인데 무척 신기하고..예술같다..는 생각이 확~드는데요? ^^;

  2. BlogIcon Swingman Jersey 2013.02.20 11:24 신고

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    日期:2005-9-10 来源:互联网 编辑:风冷长河




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  3. OFFSEASON MOTION


    Absolutely nothing reveals the business flying within the ether that can compare with a good offseason associated with attention as well as indecision, associated with moves unmade as well as ill-fated. In order to phone the actual Rockies the rudderless deliver now will be a good offend in order to rudders. This can be a deliver having a pit the actual thickness associated with it's bend.

    Walt Weiss might grow to be the completely great supervisor. He's, through numerous company accounts, a great innovator, and also the Paul Matheny-Robin Ventura double-shot associated with neophyte achievement final period emboldened the actual Rockies in order to pick Weiss through their placement like a senior high school trainer. The actual every day mill, the actual press responsibilities, the actual social relationships – he or she do everything like a participant, as well as getting invested 7 months like a Rockies unique helper, he or she knows the business.
    Walt Weiss is actually controlling below the one-year agreement using the Rockies. (Getty Pictures)
    In the event that Weiss is really guaranteeing, after that, and when he's the person below who the actual Rockies be prepared to spider out of the rubble from the most detrimental period within business background, just how can these people perhaps justify providing him or her the one-year agreement? This isn't the supervisor battling with regard to their work following low quality overall performance; this can be a supervisor beginning employment, as well as beginning annually following the team's beginning pitchers set up the group 5. 80 PERIOD, an issue the actual Rockies possess tackled along with hostility this particular offseason. As well as through hostility, all of us imply these people re-signed Shaun Francis, that introduced lower the actual rotation's general amounts together with his 5. fifty eight PERIOD.

    Or else, this particular Rockies offseason offers contains a few thumb-twiddling, a few skipped free of charge brokers along with a industry associated with possible result. When it comes to regardless of whether in order to industry middle fielder Dexter Fowler, arriving away their large period, the actual Rockies requested several pitchers in exchange or perhaps a excessive come back, such as Kris Medlen. The actual Rockies regarded as heading 3 years upon reliever Paul Adams prior to viewing him or her indication along with Philadelphia.


    [More MLB Springboards: No. 30 Astros | No. 29 Marlins | No. 28 Mets]

    Within their greatest offer, Co threw in the towel Alex Whitened, among the table decorations from the mutually terrible Ubaldo Jimenez offer, with regard to alleviation glass pitcher Wilton Lopez, who had been upon their method to Philadelphia till physicians looked over their shoulder as well as asked yourself regardless of whether ligaments or even mashed taters kept this collectively. Their MRI handed gather for that Rockies, and when certainly he or she continues to be wholesome, it is a experienced proceed with regard to common supervisor … oh yea, may as well begin presently there whenever talking about the actual Rockies' long-term diagnosis.

    ACTUALITY EXAMINE

    Serta O'Dowd may be the Rockies' common supervisor, just he or she does not handle the actual Rockies. Expenses Geivett may be the Rockies' older VP associated with main category procedures, meaning he or she works the actual main category group without having manage within the essential small category program. The actual GM-by-committee program, similar to the closer-by-committee program, might function in the event that within the correct fingers. They are not really the best fingers.

    The actual Rockies really are a humidor filled with poor choices, through not really budging upon the buying price of their own excess daily gamers in order to Task 5, 183, O'Dowd's strategy targeted at resolving the actual challenges associated with pitching within Colorado, http://www.denverbroncoseshop.com/ Peyton Manning Jersey. How the Rockies commissioned this effort is within as well as associated with by itself the best thing, and they regarded as the actual value of the four-man rotator much more therefore. Restricting individuals 4 pitchers in order to simply seventy five pitches, nevertheless, eventually demonstrated inadequate. And not simply since the 4 pitchers these people occurred to make use of had been absolutely no great.

    O'Dowd makes its way into their thirteenth period, as well as for the reason that period, the actual Rockies possess all 5 months through pitchers with increased compared to 4 Is victorious Over Alternative: May well Kennedy within 2004, Jerr Jennings within '06, Aaron Prepare within '08 as well as Jimenez within last year as well as '10. The only real groups along with less this kind of months tend to be Pittsburgh, North park as well as Baltimore, as well as, nicely, you can observe the type associated with organization the actual Rockies maintain.


    [Related: $10 million changes Lance Berkman's mind about DH]


    Carlos Gonzalez brought the actual Rockies within RBIs along with eighty-five final period. (Getty Pictures) Absolutely no query: It's hard to build up pitching within Colorado's nothing. And that is the pity, simply because – this particular seems therefore 1998 – it is the one thing keeping back again the actual Rockies through achievement. The primary associated with Troy Tulowitzki, Carlos Gonzalez, Fowler as well as Wilin Rosario is really a truly, great starting point. Amongst Todd Helton, The nike jordan Pacheco, Bob Nelson as well as soon-to-arrive prospective client Nolan Arenado, they have the mish-mash associated with choices in the beginning as well as 3rd bottom.

    Exactly where Erina Cuddyer as well as their leftover 2 yrs as well as $21 zillion easily fit in here's not really generously apparent. For any group which will rating operates, he's excess worth – the type which, in a sensible income with regard to their unpleasant manufacturing, might provide some thing in the industry. Nevertheless, the actual Rockies tend to be disinclined to do this, as well as thinking about the condition of the rotator right now – Jhoulys Chacin, the actual recuperating Jorge de los angeles Rosa as well as Juan Nicasio, Francis as well as among the Came Pomeranz-Tyler Chatwood-Christian Friedrich triumvirate – not really buying and selling striking with regard to pitching is actually energetic malice.

    It isn't such as there is a lot arriving, possibly. The actual nearest point the actual Rockies need to pitching potential customers would be the low-upside Tyler Anderson as well as Edwar Cabrera. And when the actual payroll shearing remains constant, Tulowitzki as well as Gonzalez might occupy the mixed 1 / 2 of the actual Rockies' spending budget through 2015. Regardless of whether each stay in the Rockies standard at that time is actually among too many queries encircling the business which bumbled it's method in the 2007 Globe Sequence towards the base from the activity in two ten years.

    MESSIAH

    Eventually, the actual management vacuum cleaner would go to the actual the surface of the business, exactly where Rockies proprietor Penis Monfort enables their company in order to traipse together as though led through Apple company Roadmaps. Inefficiencies tend to be rife all through football; administration framework isn't some of those inefficiencies. Businesses tend to be large, unwieldy as well as greatest offered through anyone managing all of them. Possibly simply because Monfort offers operate their loved ones company together with his sibling Charlie he's comfortable in order to the thought of co-CEOs. It won't function within football, and also the faster Penis Monfort identifies which, the earlier the actual Rockies can come not to throwing away Tulowitzki as well as Gonzalez's perfect many years.

  4. ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++
    1、一条警犬看到马路上过来一条普通狗,就气势凶凶地跑去质问它:我是警犬,你是什么东西?普通狗不屑一顾地看看它说:蠢货,看清楚点,老子是便衣!

      2、我有一个要求:请我吃饭。我希望你能满足我。否则我就把你的手机号写在墙上,前边再加两个字:办证。还要请我吃好,要不就写:征婚,男女皆可,条件不限。

      3、食人族父子打猎,其子擒一瘦子,其父曰:放,没肉!其子又擒一胖子,其父曰:放,太腻!其子又擒一美女,其父曰:带回家,晚上把你妈吃了!

      4、 一天咱俩到一口许愿井旁,我弯下腰许了个愿还望井里扔了个硬币,你也想许愿, 但你弯腰时不小心翻入井里,我被惊呆了,喃喃自语道:还真灵嘿!

      5、你我都是单翼的天使,唯有彼此拥抱才能展翅飞翔。我来到世上就是为了寻找你,千辛万苦找到你后却发现:TMD!咱俩的翅膀是一顺边的!

      6、四岁的男孩亲了三岁的女孩一口,女孩对男孩说:你亲了我可要对我负责啊。男孩成熟地拍了拍女孩的肩膀,笑着说:你放心,我们又不是一两岁的小孩子了!

      7、深夜布什看到拉登站立在自己床前,批头散发,布什大惊说:你好大胆,敢夜闯白宫!拉登甩了甩齐胸的胡子,阴森地笑了,说:飘柔,就是这样自信!

      8、猴子拣到一个卡,它想看清楚是啥卡,就爬到树枝上看,这时一个雷击中了它。猴子哭着说:原来是IP卡啊!

      9、郑喜定的媳妇不见丈夫,便到公公家去找。见公公洗脸,便问道:爹,喜定呢?公公不悦,继续洗脸。媳妇生气,又问:爹,郑喜定呢?公公大怒:洗脸!

      10、一个消化不良的病人向医生抱怨:我近来很不正常, http://www.nbabgstore.com/ Spurs Ginobili Home Jersey,吃什么拉什么,吃黄瓜拉黄瓜,吃西瓜拉西瓜,怎样才能恢复正常呢?医生沉默片刻,那你只能吃屎了。

      11、老鼠:我现在正和蝙蝠谈恋爱,以后孩子们就生活在空中,不怕你们猫了。猫冷笑一声,指着树上的猫头鹰说:看见没有,她已经怀上我的孩子了!

      12、狼入侵,小动物成立敢死队对抗。螳螂:我有双刀。刺猬:我满身都是暗器。天牛边晃触角边唱:哼!我有双节棍双节棍!哼哼哈哈!

      13、自然课老师问:为什么人死后身体是冷的?没人回答。老师又问:没人知道吗?这时,有个同学站起来说:那是因为心静自然凉。 ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++


 스트리트 파이터즈를 아시고 좋아하시는 분들 뿐만아니라 게임을 좋아 하시는 분이라면...
 아니 모든 스포츠를 통틀어 가장 멋지고 짜릿한 경기라고 할 수 있는게 바로...
 역전 승입니다.

 역전 승 중에도 게임이 다 끝났다고 할 수 있는 막바지에
 한방으로 역전 시키는 장면이 가장 멋진 장면인데요.

 야구에서는 9회말 2아웃에 역전 끝내기 홈런이 있겠고,
 축구에서는 2002년 월드컵 이탈리아 전이 좋은 예가 될 수 있습니다.



네, 역전승일 뿐만아니라 보는 사람들의 환호까지 합쳐져서 멋진 경기가 만들어 졌네요.
저 게이머에 대해서는 잘 모르지만 저 장면을 설명하자면,

원래 필살기를 막아도 어느정도 데미지가 들어가게 됩니다.
동영상을 보시면 켄 캐릭터의 에너지 게이지가 얼마 없는 것을 볼 수 있습니다.
대다수의 사람이 춘리 캐릭터가 필살기를 썼을 때, 끝났다고 생각을 하게 되는데,
스트리트 파이터즈3에서 블로킹이란 기술로
타격을 가하는 타이밍에 정확히 맞추어서 타격 반대 방향 ( 공격하는 캐릭터 방향 )으로 레버를 탁탁 밀어주면
데미지가 전혀 없이 막을 수 있습니다.

춘리의 필살기를 정확히 다 막아내고.. ( 특히 점프를 해서 블로킹 하는 장면도 있었죠 )
오히려 반격을 해서 경기를 역전시켜 버리는 멋진 장면입니다.




검색을 해보니 풀 동영상이 있네요.
역시 게임같은 e 스포츠건 그냥 스포츠건 관객의 환호가 있으면
감동은 두배,, 아니 그 이상이 되는 것 같습니다.


  1. BlogIcon 열산성 2010.07.03 17:13 신고

    우와~~~ 내 일처럼 호탕하게 웃다 갑니다~


날개 없는 선풍기라고 하는데...
신기하네요.




물리나 유체 역학을 잘 모르긴 하지만 넓은 곳의 공기를 좁은 곳으로 흐르게 하여 바람이 빨라지는 원리인가 봅니다.




실용화 될 수 있을까요?
이런 신기한 제품들 보면 참 창의력이 중요하구나~~ 하고 생각하게 됩니다. ㅎ



 갑자기 밥 아저씨가 생각나는 제목인데요.
 물감이 아니라 락카라고 해야하나 스프레이 형식의 페인트로 순식간에 그림을 그리는 영상입니다.




어때요 참 쉽죠?





 여러분은 레고를 아시나요? 블럭 장난감으로 제가 어렸을 때, 많이 가지고 놀던 기억이 있습니다. 기본적인 블럭을 가지고 만들 수있는 작품이 무궁무진해서 어린이들의 상상력 개발에도 도움이 되는데요. 특히 레고 마을이라는 곳도 있어서 레고로 여러가지 작품들을 만들고, 심지어 마을하나를 레고 블럭을 이용해서 만들어 놓은 곳도 있습니다.

Zombie Apocafest 2008 - Overall
Zombie Apocafest 2008 - Overall by Dunechaser 저작자 표시비영리동일조건 변경허락

 오늘 소개해드릴 동영상은 이 레고블럭을 이용해서 프린터를 만들어 놓은 영상입니다. 일단 한번 보시죠.



자세히 보시면 잉크젯이 아니라 끝에 싸인펜을 달아 놓고 점을 하나하나 찍는 방식입니다. 어떻게 구현했는지, 또 어떻게 만들었는지 모르겠지만 정말 대단하네요. 요즘에 레고와 JAVA를 이용해서 로봇을 만드는 세트도 있던데 정말 비싸더군요. ㅎㄷㄷ. 아무튼 저도 레고로 로봇 한번 만들어 보고 싶네요. ^^






  1. BlogIcon 불탄 2010.06.07 06:45 신고

    정말 감탄사가 흘러나오게 만드네요. ^^

  2. 헐ㅋㅋㅋ 2010.07.09 17:57 신고

    완전 쩌네요 ㅋㅋㅋㅋ 아 황당하네 ㅋㅋ

  3. ゼブラ軍団の選手の2013十二月二十八日に戻る訓練場が、最初から最後までは一週間が、連続複線作戦の選手が十分に休息.再開訓練の後、チームは同じ日に容易ではない、最初は1月6日対陣サンプドリアの試合、そして1月9日を迎えたミラノとイタリアカップの試合に直面して、だからセーラー軍団初戦ではなく、paiweidaerと武西ブリタニア奇選手.

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    ゲーム好きユヴェントスのこれまでの試合で、チームが攻めてかなりいい、前半だけ9足シュート.知っている2013ユベントスはカリャリ撮影30フィート、刷新シーズンセリエA単場の大半の時間.頼るマルキジオの突破は、1ボールは鉛、1人余り、老婦人は急がない.後半開始後、ユベントスリーグのベストバック急にも、逆再生は、右サイド突破となっており、シャープなエッジ第52分の少年、サンプドリア聖域の右側に副撮影、ブッフォンフライ反発し、ゴールキーパー吉安路易吉ユベントス&middot;一定の責任で、私はやはり小角度シュートヒット以外のイタリア、サンプドリアの少しの1人の情況の下で逆転

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    これらはおかしくないユベントス第73分、烏西妮基扳平スコア機会があって、彼はマークの情況の下でシュートするクラウンの後、リバウンドしロメロ沒収され.老婦人が失って一回扳平スコア機会、もっとまずい情況の末、第百分、マルキジオ右足首関節続けられないが、ユヴェントスはもう終わるすべての変化の場所、ユヴェントスの王子は境界処理、ユベントス、サンプドリアの11/11.そしてマルキジオに球場は見えないbonuiと戦い、すべての場合には地の上で横たわって、それがいい.前半が堅持することができません、マルキジオれ担ぎ末路担架.老婦人が彼らの初試合

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    負けサンプドリア、ユベントスは一番面倒で、結局あのボールの後9分トップポイントランキング.最大の問題から損傷、傷はMFクラウディオ&middot; ;マルキジオ、ユヴェントスの噂を購入波利乗組員団とアトランタの奇加里尼、今私が買ってしまった.



    キスは設計の原則を簡単に、愚かなキスの原則の声明!同システムの仕事には、最高の維持に簡単、複雑なので、重要な目標は、不必要な複雑さを避けるべきだ.誤差を含む変化にフレーズ守って愚かなそれを短期と簡単で、シンプルな、保持の超簡単、愚を簡単と、保持簡単と愚かな、保持簡単と明確なと簡単と誠実を保つ.

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[신기] 비트박스의 달인


 비트박스하면 생각나는 사람이 있죠. "비트박스를 잘하려면 2가지만 기억하세요. 북치기 박치기. " 비트박스를 북치기 박치기로 대중에게 소개했었던 CF인 SK의 TTL CF가 있었죠. 비트박스 하면 북치기 박치기, 후니훈으로 기억을 하게 되었는데요. 저 역시 고등학교때 잠깐 비트박스를 배웠었는데 후니훈의 영향이 적지 않았던 것으로 기억합니다.



 실제로 비트박스 카페에 가보면 비트박스를 굉장히 잘 하는 분들이 많이 있습니다. ( 링크:다음비트박스카페) 후니훈의 비트박스만 보고 이 카페에 가입했는데 완전 다른 세상이더군요. 북치기 박치기는 무슨... 알아야 하는 기술들이 굉장히 많고 제가 비트박스 배울때가 비트박스 인구가 폭발적으로 늘어나던 시기여서 새로운 기술들도 많이 생겨 나더라구요. 엄청 신기했었습니다.
 (ps. 여담이지만 비트박스를 배우면서 기본적인 기술들이 있는데, 제 기억엔 가장 힘들었던 기술이 스네어 류의 기술이었습니다. 스네어 소리를 내는데에도 며칠이 걸렸고, 펀치 스네어 등등 많은 기술들이 나와서 따라 잡기가 매우 힘들었던 기억이 있습니다. )
 


 신기하죠. 저렇게 비트박스를 잘하기까지 무던한 노력이 필요했을 겁니다. 입이 부르트도록 비트박스를 해대야 남들이 잘 한다고 생각 할 정도로 잘 하게 되는데요. 저 분은 정말 소리도 깔끔하게 잘 나고 실력도 굉장히 좋은 것 같네요.

 이 영상들을 보니까 오랜만에 북치기 박치기 흥이 돋네요. ㅋㅋ



  1. 2010.06.04 19:58

    비밀댓글입니다

  2. ㅋㅋ 2010.08.03 00:27 신고

    ㅋㅋㅋ윈드 접밥아님 ? 쟤 별룬데 ㅋ

  3. ㅋㅋ 2010.08.03 00:30 신고

    윈드가 머냐면 마지막에 햇던 오이스 라이스 아이스 히스 비스 아이 시노 허사 파티크 s티크 타티크 s티크 피티크 s티크 시노 s사 뿜띠크s뿜 띠끄띠끄s띠끄 뿜띠끄 s뿜 띠끄 뿜s뿜 우노 s티크 도우스 s띠끄 트렌스 s 과 트로 s티크 임

  4. ㅇㅇ 2010.10.13 19:04 신고

    윈드좃밥임 ㅋㅋ아무리쉬워도 리슨투마이피플정도는 해야짘ㅋ
    그리고 ㅋㅋ님 족보좀 틀리셧음..
    오이스 아이스 라이스 이스 비스 아이 시노 허 사
    파띠끄 sk커 다띠끄 s띠끄 피띠끄 sk 시노 s 사
    마지막부분도 안적엇넼ㅋㅋ

  5. 저기 위에님들아 2011.08.24 18:39 신고

    야이 병신들아 윈드는 원레 케스네어(강한 림샷)으로 하는게 정상이다 병신들아
    ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ스네어? ㅋㅋㅋ 초딩들이 스네어로 윈드만 좆나게 파다가 접지 ㅋㅋ 씨

  6. 저기 위에님들아 2011.08.24 18:40 신고

    그리고 ㅋㅋㅋㅋ윈드좆밥? ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ저분 독일비트박서중에서 존나 유명한데 ㅋㅋㅋㅋ그리고 족보는 따로 정해진게 아니고 듣는사람이 족보를 그대로 만든거라서 10% 확실하지 않아요 등신아 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ 리슨투마피플 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ아존나웃기네 ㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋㅋ저분은 . 로빗 스네어 프리스타일있죠. 그거 그냥 껌으로 할뜻 ㅋㅋ 펀치스네어 소리 보면 모르냐 이 비트박스 좆밥들아

  7. BlogIcon 해우기 2011.08.24 23:21 신고

    ㅎㅎㅎ

    비트박스라....
    한번도 시도해본적도 없는 사람이라서....


[신기한 자료] 무회전 슛의 비밀을 파헤치다.


 축구를 좋아하시는 분들은 무회전 슛이라는 마구같은 슛을 아실 겁니다. 축구를 좋아하지 않으시는 분이라도 너클 볼이라는 야구의 마구를 들어 보신 분이 많이 계실꺼라고 생각이 됩니다. 일단 무회전 슛을 찍은 동영상을 하나 소개해 드리겠습니다.





 "공이 날아간다." 라는 표현이 맞을까요? 원래 축구 선수들이 찬 공은 축구 선수들이 경로를 예측해서 공에 회전을 주고 그 회전의 정도에 따라 포물선을 그리면서 날아갑니다. 하지만 위 영상에서 볼 때 공은 축구선수가 포물선을 예측하면서 쏜게 아니라 그야 말로 스스로 날아가는 듯한 인상을 주고 있습니다.


주닝요 페르남부카노 (Antonio Augusto Ribeiro Reis Junior) / 외국축구선수
출생 1975년 1월 30일
신체 키178cm, 체중72kg
팬카페
상세보기


  무회전 슛이 특기인 주니뉴라는 선수인 것 같은데, 역시 공의 움직임이 심상치 않습니다. 화질이 안 좋아서 잘 모르겠지만 원래 무회전 슛을 초고속 카메라로 찍으면 회전이 별로 없거나 이 선수 같은 경우엔 회전이 전혀 없는 슛도 있습니다.

 무회전 슛은 축구 선수나 축구 팬들에게 많은 이슈로 다가왔었는데요. 일본의 한 TV 프로그램에서 무회전 슛에 대한 비밀을 밝혔습니다.





 구기 종목에서 공의 회전은 공 주변의 기압과 밀접한 관련이 있습니다. 공이 회전을 할 때 공 표면의 마찰로 인해서 한쪽면의 기압이 반대편보다 미묘하게 높아지게 됩니다. 기압의 차이는 곧 힘의 작용을 불러일으켜서 기압이 높은 곳에서 낮은 쪽으로 힘이 생깁니다. 그런 힘으로 인해서 축구 같은 경우 휘어지는 슛이나 킥이 나오고 야구의 경우에는 변화구가 나오게 되는 것입니다.

 무회전 슛의 경우에는 회전이 없기 때문에 회전때문에 발생하는 기압의 차이는 공의 움직임을 설명 할 수가 없습니다. 무회전 슛의 경우엔  카르만의 소용돌이라는 재미있는 현상이 공의 움직임을 지배합니다. ( 위 동영상을 보시면 자세하게 설명되어 있습니다. )


Someone should get into these shoes and kick that ball...
Someone should get into these shoes and kick that ball... by Philipp Hilpert 저작자 표시비영리


 간략하게 설명을 드리자면, 회전없이 전진하는 공의 경우 공이 앞으로 나아가면서 공 뒤쪽의 기압이 낮아집니다. 그래서 주변의 공기가 공 뒤쪽으로 움직여서 기압을 주변과 동일하게 맞추게 됩니다. 이 때, 가끔 소용돌이가 생기게 되는데, 이 소용돌이를 카르만의 소용돌이라고 합니다. 소용돌이가 생기게 되면 소용돌이 부분이 다른 부분보다 기압이 낮게 되어 공이 소용돌이 쪽으로 움직이게 됩니다.

 문제는 이 소용돌이가 랜덤하게 발생한다는 데에 있습니다. 공의 움직임을 지배하는 이 카르만 소용돌이가 예측 할 수 없게, 즉 랜덤하게 발생하기 때문에 공의 움직임 또한 예측 할 수 없는 움직임으로 나타난다는 것이죠. ( 예측할 수 없지만 우리 눈으로 볼 때에는 좌우로 흔들리는 것처럼 보이게 됩니다. )


Arsenal v Liverpool
Arsenal v Liverpool by toksuede 저작자 표시비영리변경 금지


 자세한 것은 위 영상에서 설명하고 있으니 ^^ ( 아무래도 전문적인 설명을 들으시는게 더 좋겠죠 ? ) 우리나라 선수들도 무회전 슛을 자유 자재로 쓸 수 있다면 좀 더 강력한 공격수가 되거나 강력한 슛을 가지게 될 것 같네요.



  1. BlogIcon 멀티라이프 2010.05.25 14:14 신고

    짐작은 하면서도 잘 알지는 못하는 내용이었는데~
    궁금증 해결하고 갑니다.


[신기한 자료] 슈퍼 마리오 발로 깨기



 흔히 너무 쉬운 것을 말할 때, "XX는 발로 해도 이기겠다." 라는 말을 많이 합니다. 진짜 발을 사용한다는 의미가 아니라 그만큼 대충 해도 달성 할 수 있다는 말이지요. 이번에 볼 동영상은 슈퍼 마리오 엔딩을 보는 동영상인데 정말 발로 깹니다. 예전에 PC에 연결해서 DDR을 즐기던 패드를 이용해서 슈퍼 마리오를 플레이 하는 영상입니다.





 아까 작성한 포스트에서도 말씀드렸다시피 여기서 저분이 발로 깨는 버전의 슈퍼 마리오는 아직 손으로도 못 깬 버전입니다. 남은 발로도 깨는데 손으로도 못 깨는 저는 뭔가요.


슈퍼 마리오 발로 깨기

슈퍼 마리오 발로 깨기



 오른쪽에 보이는 DDR 판처럼 생긴 걸로 방향키와 점프, 그리고 스피드( 총알 ) 버튼을 조작합니다. 플레이 화면을 보시면 손으로 하는 것 만큼 화려하지는 않지만 움직임 하나하나가 정말 정교합니다. 이거 찍으려고 혹은 이런 경지까지 오르기까지 얼마나 많이 플레이를 했을까요? 어느 날 갑자기 슈퍼 마리오 발로 깨기를 생각해내고 그걸 이렇게 UCC로 만들어서 올리는 생각... 창의적이랄까요. ㅋㅋ


슈퍼 마리오 발로 깨기

슈퍼 마리오 발로 깨기 : 최악의 난이도



 제가 가장 어려워 하는 부분이 이런 부분인데, 스피드를 올리고 점프 & 점프로 돌파를 하려고 자꾸만 시도를 해서, 또 한번 점프하고 미끄러져서 떨어지는 부분인데, 발로도 컨트롤을 잘 하네요. ( 발컨이라고 놀리면 안 되겠습니다. ㅎㅎ )

 뭐,, 달인이라고 칭해주고 싶네요. ㅎㅎ


  1. 吻是一个设计原则,保持简单,愚蠢的吻的原则声明!该系统的工作,最好是保持简单,不复杂,因此应该是一个关键目标和不必要的复杂性,应避免。误差变化对短语包括“保持愚蠢简单”,“保持它的短期和简单”,“简单”,“保持它的超级简单”,“使简单和愚蠢”,“保持简单和愚蠢的”,“保持简单和明确的”和“保持简单和真诚。”

    起源[ ]

    缩写是杜撰,工程师(造物主的间谍飞机,|等等。

    |和流行使用翻译)as'keep简单,愚蠢的”,约翰逊翻译了它as'keep简单和愚蠢,这仍然是用许多作者阅读。有没有隐藏的意义,工程师是愚蠢的;

    对面。

    原则就是最好的例子,约翰逊的故事的一组工程师设计的工具组,和挑战,喷气飞机,他们必须采取平均机械领域作战条件下,只有这些工具。因此,之间的关系the'stupid'refers方式打破的东西,|复杂可修。

    |缩写被广泛使用领域和

    变种[ ]。

    原则很可能发现它的起源在类似的概念,例如,“简单是最复杂的”,“少就是多”,“看上去很完美,不是什么是没有增加,但当没有东西需要创始人”,敦促, http://www.newairjordans2013.us New Jordans 2013,设计师,和亮度增加故意简化”overly-complex解决方案”,一个简单的任务或问题,幽默的例子“non-kiss |”的解决方案。

    |,例子,是一个失败的例子是吻并不遵循相同的,在项目管理。电影动画

    掌握动画解释吻的原则在他的书中,写它,认为这是“动画圣经”的重心,传统和停止运动动画,[ ]。经验的动画师可以“overanimate”,或使他们的字符移动太多,做的太多,如携带每口音为肢体语言,面部表情和死亡。威廉姆斯敦促动画“吻”。

    参考[ ]

    这是根据材料,从十一月1前2008和纳入“许可”,版本或更高版本。

    [ ] linksschoolconceptsdisciplinesapproachesawardsintellectual propertyorganizationstoolsrelated 1.3

  2. BlogIcon セリーヌ カバ 2013.03.18 12:33 신고

    『第38回 木村伊兵衛写真賞』受賞者は菊地智子と百々新、受賞作品展は4月から写真賞『第38回 木村伊兵衛写真賞』の受賞者が発表された, http://www.r4r4i-jp.com/ マジコン 激安。

    昭和を代表する写真家・木村伊兵衛の名を冠した同賞は、その年に優れた作品を発表した新人写真家に与えられるもの。1975年の創設以来、これまでに藤原新也、石内都、畠山直哉、都築響一、ホンマタカシ、鈴木理策、蜷川実花、HIROMIX、川内倫子、佐内正史、梅佳代、本城直季、田附勝らが受賞しており、「写真会の芥川賞」とも称される写真賞だ, http://www.monclersjp2013.com/ モンクレール。

    【もっと作品写真を見る】

    2012年度の受賞者は、菊地智子と百々新の2人。現代中国に生きる人々の心を揺れを撮影する菊地は、東京都・恵比寿の東京都写真美術館で開催されたグループ展『日本の新進作家vol.11 この世界とわたしのどこか』にて発表された『I and I』が受賞作品として挙げられている。百々は、カスピ海沿岸の風土や営みを捉えた写真集『対岸』および東京・銀座のニコンサロンほかで開催された同名写真展が受賞作品となった, http://www.r4r4ishop.com/ R4i GOLD。

    授賞式は、4月23日に東京・丸の内の東京會舘で行われるほか、受賞作品展が同日4月23日から東京・新宿のコニカミノルタプラザ(ギャラリーC)で開催, http://www.r4r4ishop.com/DSTTi/ DSTTi。なお、選考過程などの詳細は3月19日発売の『アサヒカメラ 4月号』に掲載される。CINRA, http://www.r4r4ishop.com/ r4ds 通販.NET【関連記事】 竹久夢二や高畠華宵らの約200点の大衆芸術を集めた『大正ロマン昭和モダン展』 銀座メゾンエルメス最上階に広がる有機的な模型群、パラモデルのインスタレーション展 最小限の色数とタイポグラフィ、カリ・ピッポ作品から見る北欧グラフィックデザイン 美術館に入学、誰でも作品発表可能な『びじゅつの学校』が十和田市現代美術館で開催 3作家による企画展『Hijack Your Heart !』、最終日には他作家の作品を占拠
    Related articles:


    http://www.306tv.net/forum.php?mod=viewthread&tid=241070 セリーヌ 靴 T

    http://www.huangzi.cn/bbs/viewthread.php?tid=404802&pid=484989&page=1&extra=page=1#pid484989 ビームス モンクレール &lt

  3. BlogIcon Tim Duncan home Jersey 2013.03.20 11:33 신고

    1、那天我痴痴地望着你性感的身躯,一丝不挂地在我面前扭动,轻轻抚摸你的肌肤,我无法抵挡你的诱惑:老板,我就要这条鱼!


    2、你快乐因为我快乐,我开心因为你开心,我愁了因为你瘦了,我瘦了因为你病了,我笑了因为你壮了,我有钱了因为把你卖了…………猪啊!


    3、我第一次时很紧张,他一直要我温柔地放松,接着插入我身体,那里在流血,我痛得喊不出话来,这才明白……献血是这样的!


    4、那一夜我抱着你,在你耳边叫你戴上那玩意,你说不戴的感觉才够爽,现在是安全期,没事……可不戴头盔交警抓着咋办


    5、我是一个暗恋你的人,见到你的第一眼我就认定你是我今生该等的人,但我唯一的遗憾是…………抱歉,我发错人了


    6、当你默默离开我时,我痛苦万分,不知如何是好,看着你的背影远去,我恨自己,都是我的错……早起一点就赶上车了


    7、你知道吗?我天天都在想你,夜夜都在念你。吃饭时想、睡觉时想、工作时想,很想对你说…………快点还钱


    8、我真地爱你,不想离开你,心痛你让我套的那么深。如果你真地不想让我难过,请快一点涨起来……股市


    10、你善良像猫儿,你忠实像狗儿,你可爱像鸟儿,你识途像马儿,你出色像蝶儿,你勤劳像蜂儿, http://www.csnthunder.com/ Thunder Serge Ibaka road Jersey,你什么都相像,也难怪大家都叫你…………禽兽

    11、第一眼见到你,我就对自已说:你就是我今生的奋斗目标,我要追求你,拥抱你。我要宣布:我爱你……人民币


    12、没有你的日子,生活变得难受,我恨那个可恶的第三者将你抢走,你和他是否有了新感情?好想你回到我身边——钱包


    13、不要问我为什么哭泣,我的泪水为你而流,我的心为你而碎。我恨那个男人,他为什么要将你从我身边夺去……死小偷


    14、害羞的我有一句话一直都不敢向你表白,但是今天我终于鼓起勇气:你什么时候请我吃饭?


    15、如果没有风,云不会动;如果没有水,鱼不能游;如果没有太阳,月亮就不会有光;如果没有你……笨人也就不存在了


    16、食客:睡觉多少钱一晚?(水饺多少钱一碗)服务员:流氓!(六毛)商人:六毛?这么便宜。我来三晚


    17、由于次数太多(有时还一天两次),你那里的毛都被搞得乱七八糟的,抽插时也没了快感,我们还是分手吧……牙刷


    18、当我穷困潦倒时,在我身旁的是你;当我生病受伤时,在我身边的是你;当我情场失意时,在我身旁的还是你……跟你在一起真倒霉


    19、“紧吗?”“不紧!”“可以再进去一点吗?”“小心一点,应该可以!”“痛吗?”“不痛!感觉真爽!就买这双吧。


    20、看着你那流线的躯体,我欲火焚身,拨开你那尚未开启的封盖,插入我自备的小棍,吸取你晶莹的液体,爽!雪碧



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  4. BlogIcon Andrew Luck Blue Jersey 2013.03.21 17:05 신고

    ++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++





    宁静的心态是一种境界,告诉你一个调节情绪的好方法:买一个西瓜,你可以拿刀捅它砍它还可以发泄地大声吼:我杀瓜!我杀瓜!

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        “味道如何?”大师问道。
        “咸得发苦。”弟子皱着眉头答道。
      
        随后,大师又带着弟子来到湖边,吩咐他把剩下的盐撒进湖里,然后说道:“再尝尝湖水。”
        弟子弯腰捧起湖水尝了尝。
        大师问道:“什么味道?”
      
        “纯净甜美。”弟子答道。
        “尝到咸味了吗?”大师又问。
        “没有。”弟子答道。
      
        大师点了点头,微笑着对弟子说道:“生命中的痛苦是盐,它的咸淡取决于盛它的容器。”

     女教师在黑板上画了一个苹果,然后提问:“孩子们,这是什么呀?”孩子们异口同声地回答:“屁股!”女教师哭着跑出教室,找校长告状:“孩子们嘲笑人。”校长走进教室,表情严肃地说:“你们怎么把老师气哭了?啊!还在黑板上画了个屁股!”

     我喜欢邓丽君死掉了,
      我喜欢翁美玲自杀了,
      我喜欢陈百强,病故了;
      我喜欢黄家驹,摔死了;
      我喜欢张国荣跳楼了,
      我喜欢你,你自己看着办吧!

    听说你在超市遇到奇事,结帐时无意将手放到扫描仪上,
      收款机立刻显示: 猪蹄 3.8元
      你纳闷,低头看究竟,
      收款机显示: 猪头 2.5元

      黄教授在某女校课堂上大发雷霆:“我在上面累得半死,而你们却在下面一动也不动。我前後已经付出这麽多了,你们到底有没有吸收到什麽东西啊?”女学生们面面相觑!

    大伟一日上街擦破鞋,擦鞋的是个女的。将低头看女子的乳房,女子问他在看什么,他说:“桃花盛开的地方。”女子突然站起来,叉开双腿说: “这里还有生你养你的地方呢!”

     小孩把妓院养的鹦鹉偷回家.一进门鹦鹉便叫:搬家啦!看见他妈妈又叫:老板也换了!看见他姐姐有叫.小姐也换了!看见他爸爸又叫:我操还是老客户!

    今天吃完饭,在校园里找了个长椅打了个盹,醒来居然发现饭盒里多了几毛钱。

    一个五岁的男孩吻了一个四岁的小女孩,事后,小女孩问男孩:你会对我认真吗?男孩说:放心,我们都不是3岁小孩子了。

     我决定把所有存款换成钢蹦,足足有三百多枚,没事拿着玩,还可以晃荡着听响,你若敢惹我,我就用钢蹦砸你,砸得你满头是苞!让你知道有钱人的厉害!

     有一个知己,相交甚深,但无缘成为眷侣,只是偶尔在电话里纠缠,
      说些不 相干的事、不相干的人,心知肚明的感情,云淡风清。    
      
      有一个朋友,是亲密搭档,相互理解与信赖,而且惺惺相惜,业务与工作之 余,心生赞叹,但无从表达。    
      
      有一个网友,只通过电话,但心有灵犀,语言传递相知相解,在午夜相逢的 快乐里,却只能思念,相聚在梦中。    
      
      有一种爱,我们不能称之为爱情。虽然有同样的心动,同样的怀想,同样乍然相见的喜悦、依依不舍的眷恋,但尘世间总有一种约束,让心思沉静,让感情不再漂泊,发乎情,只能止乎礼。但依然可以在阳光下享受难得的温情,依然可以在午夜梦回时心生柔情,依然可以相信自己的完美与可爱……在这些温柔的情愫里,依然,可以感受被爱。      
      
      我们的世界,毕竟不仅仅有爱情。在岁月漫长的脚步里,我们更多对水色山 光的眷恋。红玫瑰只有一朵,燃烧此生唯一的心情,而更多时候,空气与水都是 恩赐,让我们享受生活。    
      
      有一种真情,可以平静的相忘于江湖。君子之交,亦或萍水相逢,都可以默 默的爱,默默的理解,默默在心里装满祝福,挥一挥手,让春草连绵,落红成阵。    
      
      有很多爱,我们不能用世俗的方式承担,也不过聚散随缘,风雨由天,金风 玉露,胜却人间无数。    
      
      就是有这样的感情啊,飘荡成缠绵而温暖的空气,就是在这样无心的眷恋 里,我们认识自己也认识世间,就是有这样无缘而有情的瞬间。让我们轻轻地叹 息,深深地爱恋,生命中白白的云,蓝蓝的天。    
      
      虽然我们相爱,但我们,不称之为爱情。 

    老师爆笑语录

    1.男同学站在我左边,女同学站在我右边,其他人原地不动...结果就他没动。

      2.有一天外面下大雨,老师满脸雨水的走进教室,在讲桌前不知道找着什么东西,找了一会就问前排的同学:“我擦纸的脸呢?”

      3.线段a是线段b的一半,那线段b是线段a的多少呢?(全班皆静,候高论,半晌后)线段b就是线段a的两半。(晕)

      4.初中,某数学老师讲方程式变换,在讲台上袖子一挽大声喝道:同学们注意!我要变形了!……

      5.一同学在下面闹,我们老师说:“你给我站到黑板上面去!!”高难度啊。

      6.我初中老师讲题目喜欢用投身其中……“我的底面半径是20cm,我的高是50cm,那么我……”下面有人说“是饭桶……”全班爆笑……

      7.初中英语老师是个秃子,一天上课,他问一个同学:“what day is today?’(我的头是秃头?)同学想了一下,回答:“yes.”

      8.高三数学摸底一男生问:老师,画图没有铅笔,是借一支还是用钢笔?老师(老年妇女)答:随你的大小便吧。

      9.高中的代数老师:“说话不许出声音。”

      10.高中一化学老师兼教导主任做题时故意做错,然后让某同学找出其中的错误。该同学艰难的答出之后,老师赞许而很严肃地说:“很好,你看出了老师的破腚(绽)。”众皆木然,下课后,老师刚走出去,全班哄堂大笑。

      11.某日,我们高中数学老师跟我们讲函数周期表时,讲到“周期”二字时激动地走下讲台,对着全班同学说:“你们还不了解周期啊,真的是猪都比你们聪明些。”然后他指着第一排的一个女生说:“你知道什么是周期吗?你跟他们解释一下。”全班均晕倒。

      12.我们初中时候规定升国旗时候要穿校服,结果总有一些人没有穿校服或者是单只穿裤子或者是衣服。然后每次升旗之前校长都拿着一个扩音喇叭在那里说:“有的同学不穿衣服,有的同学不穿裤子,有的就干脆衣服裤子都不穿”

      13.语文老师教赤壁的课文,说起曹兵在华容道互相践踏,感慨道:人流是可怕的……

      14.某天上数学偶看到偶们数学老师牙上有片绿叶子(老师中午估计是吃韭菜馅的饺子了)过了一会发现叶子没了………下课的时候发现在我们班某女生的脖子上……

      15.初中语文课的女老师刚从师大毕业,什么都好,就是喜欢突击式地抽同学上黑板默写名词解释。方法是,老师口述某个词,同学默写,并加解释。记得有一次,抽到一个不爱听讲的男生。老师一遍一遍地重复念“间或”,那男生抓着头皮在黑板前熬了好几分钟,突然刷刷刷地写下:贱货:下流呸,不是好东西。全班暴笑,女老师气得面红耳赤,一句话都讲不出。
    计算机吹牛
    1、我的cpu是我用一个电容一个电容焊接起来的!好大一砣啊……哈哈哈!
    2、楼上的很厉害,可怜我昨天费了一个晚上的工夫才用小刀在我的硬盘上刻了一个操作系统,我要向大家学习啊!  3、吹吧,吹牛不上税……我昨天把我家的那台老式电视拆了,七拼八凑变成了一块gf4ti4800的显卡,赚了……
    4、这算什么,刚才我边吃苹果边上网,忽然就死机了,重启一下就发现操作系统就变成了mac os。    
    5、昨天闲着没事,看着自己的显示器烦,随便找了块碎玻璃,几张马粪纸,又拆了一个收音机,组装了台液晶显示器,凑合用了。
    6、我刚把我56k猫超频了,结果,我一上网,我家小区那一片的所有电话全部占线。
    7、我说点老的事情吧,那是我刚上大学的时候,大家都用286,显示器也是单显,硬盘就更小的可怜了。我一想,这样不行,于是拆了个彩电的显示屏装在显示器上,单显变彩显了。偶后来嫌硬盘小,于是回收了一千张5英寸软盘,把里面的芯全部拿出来,粘在了一起,于是一个1g多的硬盘就出来了。
    8、我穷,买不起计算机,现在只能拿这个5块钱买的计算器改成计算机上网。缺点是屏幕小,但是原来的计算器是太阳能的,我保留了这个功能。穷啊,将就吧。
    9、各位真是强人啊。我只是把电视遥控加了个带摄象头当新款手机凑合着用。
    10这里的帖子实在太大,每次打开都快死机。看来内存不足。虽然现在内存便宜,但是我穷啊,还只用128m的。我琢磨了半天,发现一个好办法,我把内存反过来插,嘿。嘀的一声自检通过,内存变成了821m的啦。
    11、我今天下午好不容易抓住一只老鼠,注入芯片把他弄成了一只鼠标。
    12、家里上网速度太慢了!我从旧货堆里找了些废弃的电线做了一条千兆单模光揽和计算机直接连起来!现在40集的电视剧一秒就搞定了!
    13、花六块钱买了两个门铃加了三合板,插上一用,真好,门铃变成了木质音箱,少了100多----
    14、昨天我把自己的猫超了一下频,今天早上起来发现我们这个社区的耗子全没有了
    15、前几天去南极抓了只企鹅硬塞进显示器里面就开始聊天了 ,可那只企鹅经常咳嗽,我怀疑得了非典~~~
    16、看到了一个美女,我打破显示屏,一下把她给拽了出来
    17、我把她拽出来,正准备xx,结果病毒突然发作,她变成了男的####shit
    18、靠,那天把三星550s在线升级成三星液晶显示屏,觉得动态显示老有问题,想卸载了重装发现没有卸载程序。
    19、人家现在做cpu哪有用烙铁焊的呢,都是用浓鼻涕粘起来的,没有鼻炎的根本就做不了。
    20、最近机器老是死机,打开机箱一看,哇靠,散热片都快化了。于是俺情急之下,把俺家老电风扇上的马达拆下来安了上去。通电一看,嘿嘿,转的真快,测了一下转速,50万转/秒。温度才零点五度。呵呵。这回可不用担心了!
    21、我家的modem坏了,于是就把我家花花塞到一个盒子里插根电话线上网,一拨号就是喵喵喵的响,而且不用电,每天往盒子里塞条鱼就行。
    22、俺是编程序的,前一段硬盘空间告急,俺编了个tamrof.exe,把15g的硬盘愣给格成51g了。可惜适用面不广,没法卖钱。那位要源代码,六个信箱就成。
    23、我从来就不用杀毒软件,我的网卡是放在醋里面的。
    24、我办公的地方在30楼。有一次老板见我上班时间在玩cs,他一气之下就抱起我的彩显,从窗外扔来下去。可把我吓坏了,我赶紧冲下楼去。坐电梯是来不及了,只好走楼梯。我拼命往下跑,跑得累死了,但我依然没有放弃。我一跑到一楼,马上冲出楼去。幸好,我冲到的时候那个彩显刚好掉下来,我顺手一接就抱回去了。这样才避免了那个彩显砸到小朋友或者花花草草。
    25、我家是开网吧d。,总是断线。后来把俺断烦了。直接在电线杆子上拉了几根电话线,抓了几只野猫,捆在一起。没想到成t1了。速度绝对够快。唯一的麻烦是费猫食。
    26、话说前几年我坐飞机,刚飞到日本上空肚子疼,就上了趟厕所,谁知到达目的地之后,就听说日本被扔了两颗原子弹。
    27、有一次公司派我去美国的ibm总部,向他们定购一台超级计算机。谈成以后,那个两吨重的计算机可把我愁死了。怎么办?公司的预算已经差不多了,但空运的费用确实不低。总不能海运吧,那样时间来不及。我想啊想,忽然想到一个好法子。原来我来美国的时候,还带了一只鸽子。现在不是刚好派得上用场吗?于是我就将那个计算机绑在了鸽子的脚上,然后放飞它。三天以后,那只鸽子成功将这台两吨重的计算机从美国运到了广州。
    28、我叔叔是警察局长。最近他们破了一个特大国际贩毒集团。这个贩毒集团已经将贩毒自动化、网络化了。你猜他们用什么输送毒品?是用qq的传送功能!看来犯罪分子确实已经学会用网络犯罪了。
    29、看了这么多条,我觉得大家都吹得没劲,只有上面一位贴的那个女孩子图不错,有劲!话音未落,那女孩就从屏幕钻出来亲了我一下。还说了一句一点不吹牛的话:你好帅,我就喜欢你这类型的,幽默。她的话还没说完,上面所有发过言的你们都变成美女了,每人亲我一下,几乎都是同样的台词:别跟我抢,这个帅哥我要!
    30、今天不知道怎么了,看见我那15寸的老ctr就烦,这不,上着上着又红屏了!我心里一急,一把将它扔楼下去了,听着声还挺脆的,我一下又慌了,赶忙下去看看,嘿!你猜怎么着?y摔下来后扁了!成17寸的了!!仔细一检查没事!我把它捧回6楼,接上pc插上电源----当一17寸的液晶用!!倍儿爽
    31、现在上网太不方便了, 因为没有鼠标  
      要知道, 我家的老公猫看上我的鼠标了, 不光夜里炒得我睡不好觉,还给搞出事情来了,生出来一个猫头鼠尾巴的东西出来,知道了,给没收了,从此再也不允许我养猫, 和用鼠标。
    32、我的光驱不太好用,读盘太慢,一气之下,把光驱拆下来扔一边,把我宿舍那台超强纠错vcd给接到电脑上,读盘速度超级快。各位不信可以试试。
    33、网友要我照片,我家穷没有扫描仪的,我只好拿出我的一目十行的功夫了,全社区的上万张照片一会我就用眼睛扫完了,发给网友叫他看个够,累死他!!!!看他还敢不敢要我照片。
    34、新买的硬盘让我在路上给摔了一下,捡起来就听见里面沙沙做响,估计里面已经摔碎了,拿回家硬盘果然不能用。没办法,挂在别人的电脑上进行碎片整理,现在用起来马马乎乎,问题不大。
    35、听说奔腾8处理器已经出来了,是我用两块奔腾4粘在一起搞出来的,已经申请了专利了!
    36、我同学要看我电脑里四十集的《天龙八部》,我带上我的硬盘找了我开压路机的二叔,喊他给我压压。回家挂上一看:1.4mb,正好一张软盘拷给他了!
    37、刚才点开这个帖子,死机了~从新启动都不行,我怀疑是硬件的毛病,拆开机箱一看,**!我的机箱里有不下100头牛!各位楼上的大哥大姐,别吹啦,俺家养不起这100头牛啊!要不明天我受累,再给你们吹回这个帖子里?


    求婚奥斯卡

    1.最佳露骨奖:让我们合法地结合吧!

    2.最佳好奇奖:我不知道人类为什么得结婚?!不如让我们一起研究看看吧!

    3.最佳直接奖:让我葬在你们家祖坟吧!

    4.最佳直销奖:你愿不愿意带我回家当你的生活必需品?

    5.最佳柔情奖:喜欢,就是淡淡的爱。爱,就是深深的喜欢。我希望以后可以不用送你回家,而是我们一起回我们的家。

    6.最佳变态奖:哦,看你骂我时,似乎有很大的快感!如果你想天天享受这种感觉,就嫁给 我吧!

    7.最佳特技奖:你愿意嫁给我吗?如果愿意请站着举高双手,如果不愿意,请站着举高双腿。

    8.最佳cool man奖:我欠一个人管我。

    9.最佳信徒奖:你想这辈子嫁给我还是下辈子呢?

    10.最佳创意奖:什么时候才要把我娶回家?我房间的东西都快全搬到你家去了.

    11.最佳保健奖:今年你再不娶我,明年我就开始有恐婚症喽!

    12.最佳告解奖:请你终结我的桃花运吧!

    13.最佳战俘奖:求饶,我投降了!只要你天天给我口饭吃。

    14.最佳影迷奖:甜心,帮我签个名吧。(签在户口簿的配偶栏)
    亲爱的老婆大人:

      遵照您的旨意,我在书房里反省了一个小时四十三分零七秒,喝了一杯白开水,上了一次卫生间,没有抽烟,以上事实准确无误,请审查。附上我的检讨报告,不当之处可以协商。经过三个月的婚姻生活,我认为老婆同志温柔贤良,勤奋聪颖,是不可多得的好妻子,而身为丈夫的我却举止乖张,态度轻狂,所作所为确有值得商榷之处。以下是我对自己恶劣行径的剖析,请领导批阅:

      1.昨天的事情是我不对。你做的红烧茄子虽然有点咸,但是香醇可口,瑕不掩瑜,我不该指责你浪费盐。我这么求全责备,完全是暗藏嫉妒之心。不过再加点水是可以的。

      2.你说喜欢陆毅的时候,我不该信口雌黄说我喜欢梁咏琪,害得你两天不能理我,极其痛苦。仔细一想,我的回答确实很不妥当,因为你的花心还局限于内地,我却冲到了港台,我还是喜欢周迅好了。

      3.你喜欢看韩剧里的小政哥,我不该百般阻挠,你拿我和他比较我也不该表示抗议,因为人家小政哥都没有抗议。

      4.星期六的那次婚礼,我说我开会,不知道能不能去,你准备了两个红包,一个100的,一个200的,结果我没去,你不小心送出去了厚的。亲爱的,我不该笑你,你已经做得很好了,换做我,可能将两个都一块儿送出去了。

      5.上次你买来黄花鱼,我不该信誓旦旦,冒充大厨,结果你帮厨时欢呼雀跃,闻味时垂涎欲滴,吃的时候却垂头丧气,对于你脆弱的心理而言,这是难以承受的。

      6.你剪短了头发,问我好不好看,我说好看,你很高兴;进一步求证,我说还行;你追问到底好不好,我回答,不如以前好,使你非常难过。这是我的错,以后此类的回复均以第一次为准。

      7.你在网上认识了很多优秀的朋友,一时间鸿雁传书,玉照纷飞,我不该用报纸上的报道打击你。不过你穿白裙子的那张照片真的不好看,还是穿高领衫的那张好,旁边有我当保镖,显得气派。

      8.探望你外甥那次,你回来和我讨论谁应该洗尿布,我的确不该推卸责任,惹你生气。不过亲爱的,这项任务过于遥远,我们还是讨论谁负责生好了。他们家是谁生的?

      9.你指责我把袜子到处乱放时,我不应该反诬你到处放书,毕竟袜子是臭的,书是香的。

      10.你请雪儿吃麦当劳的时候,我不该在桌子下面偷偷踢她,让你大发雷霆,可是她踩坏了我那么多皮鞋,你为什么都不管?

    女人最看重的东西

    mm说:“我爱你。”
    我脸红了,我不想害她:“我没钱,更没有房子和车。”
    mm盯着我的眼睛:“我知道。”
    “我的月薪只有一千五。”
    mm的目光仍然坚定无比:“以后会多的。”
    我用颤抖的双手拿出一支烟叼在嘴上:“我每天要抽一包烟,一喝酒就闹事。”
    mm笑了,“以后有我在,你放心。”
    我的脊梁上冒起一阵寒意,结结巴巴地对她说:“其实……其实我很流氓……幼儿园就喜
    欢去女厕所,小学就没了初吻,中学就……”
    mm没等我说完就软在了我的怀里,声音细若蚊鸣:“早知道你好色,你老偷偷瞄我胸脯…
    …”
    一股鼻血喷涌而出,我抱紧了mm,温热娇小的身体让我热血沸腾。这时我忽然想到了一件
    很重要的事情,我决定把这事告诉mm......
    五秒钟后mm抬头问我:“真的?”我悲愤地点点头。mm沉默片刻挣开我的怀抱抬手给了我
    一个耳光,她愤怒地朝我喊道:
    你丫竟然没有英语四级证书!”
    传说中最毒的笑话集合
    1. 一位妈妈搭计程车要去接国中的女儿。
      母女两人经过某路段,只见一个个打扮妖艳的阻街女郎
      开始站在路旁「做生意」。
      正值青春期的女儿好奇的问:
      妈妈,那些女人站在路旁干什麽?」
      为了不影响女儿幼小纯真的心灵,妈妈回答说:
      「那些女人在等老公。」
      多嘴的计程车司机却在一旁搭腔:「笑死人了,谁都嘛知道那些女人是妓 女。」
      妈妈狠生气邓了司机一眼。
      女儿接着问:「妈妈,那j女会不会生小孩。」
      妈妈冷冷的道:「当然会啊,要不然谁来开计程车!」
      2. 某日一位小姐去买肉圆。
      
      小姐:老板,我要两个小的带走!
      由於生意好,过了一会儿,老板怕忙中有错,在下锅前於是问:
      小姐,?那两粒是小的吗?
      该小姐脸一红,恨恨地回了一句:老板,你那两粒才是小的!
      
      3. 有一个女人长的粉抱歉..长的丑就算了还超没有口德的..
      一次..被安排要相亲..
      但是男主角迟迟未出现..这女人就等的不怎麽耐烦..
      就开始破口大骂..哇哩勒..竟然敢让你老娘等这麽久..&%$&^$%#@!$!%..批哩啪啦的骂了一串..
      此时..男主角出现..是个胖子..
      这女人看了更是火..於是又是批哩啪啦的骂了一串..指着男主角骂着..死胖子..%$^@#&..
      男主角终於发飙了..
      拍了桌子..大声的说..
      竟然骂我胖... 亨..至少我曾经瘦过...你你你..你美过吗...
      
      4. 有一天李总统不小心掉到水沟里了.恰好有三个小孩经过,
      李总统就对他们说:「如果你们救我起来我就给你们每人一个愿望」
      第一个小孩就说他要一辆脚踏车.
      第二个小孩就说他要一个棒球手套.
      第三个小孩想了很久说他要一台轮椅.
      李总统心里就觉得很奇怪手脚好好的为什麽需要轮椅呢?
      就问第三个小孩说:「你为什麽要轮椅呢?」
      第三个小孩就说:「如果我爸知道我救你起来会把我的腿打断.」
      
      5. 有三个人到早餐店买早点。
      第一个人跟老板说:「老板,我要一个煎蛋,但是不要蛋黄。」
      老板就照着煎了一个蛋。
      第二个人也跟老板说:「老板,我要一个煎蛋,但是不要蛋白。」
      老板也照做了,但是已经有点不耐烦了。
      轮到第三个人,老板就不客气的问他「你呢?你的蛋不要什麽?」
      第三个人有点胆怯的说:「我......我的不要蛋壳...」
      
      
      6. 买内衣
      有一天一位先生去帮他太太买内衣,因为他从来没有帮他太太买过内衣,所以他不知道要买哪一种size!
      跟店员扯了半天,店员只好拿水果来形容了!
      店员:木瓜?!先生:no!no!
      店员:苹果?!先生:不不不!
      店员:莲雾?!先生:再小一点!
      店员:鸡蛋?!先生很高兴的说:对!对!对!
      当店员了解後转身去拿内衣时,那位突然大叫:小姐等一下!是煎过的。
      
      
      7. 好个对骂
      小杜与小豪这天吵了起来…
      小杜不屑的说:「哼!你妈当初生你的时候真该直接把你掐死算了!」
      小豪用着极为鄙视的眼光不甘示弱的说:「是吗?我看你爸才应该直接把你射在墙壁呢!」
      小杜:「?.?」
      
      
      8. 一位70岁的ㄚ妈开着一部车载着3个也是ㄚ妈级的老人缓缓的开在省道上交通警察把他拦下来说:「ㄚ妈ㄝ,你开这麽慢,会影响交通的ㄝ」
      开车的ㄚ妈讲:「那个招牌不是写20吗?」
      交通警察说:「那是20号公路啦!」
      开车的ㄚ妈说:「喔!喔!那是几号公路而不是限速喔!」
      交通警察说:「对啦,疑~?你後面另外3个ㄚ妈怎麽脸色这麽难看 ㄋ!」
      开车的ㄚ妈回答:「我们刚刚从245号公路开过来ㄚ!」
      
      9. 梦遗...!
      在书店,忽然阿珠眼睛一亮,看到一本书名叫「梦遗落在草原上」
      唉呀不得了!「梦遗」居然会落在地上,真神奇!
      赶紧叫阿花来看,阿花也兴奋地打开来看仔细一看,她们才猛然发现目录上写:
      「梦,遗落在草原上。」
      阿珠大失所望,很不高兴的说:将来我要出一本书叫「月经常挂在天上」
      
      10.毛毛虫
      两只毛毛虫正爬过草地,公的毛毛虫跟母的毛毛虫说:让我们回?家去,如何啊
      母的毛毛虫说:好啊!
      这对毛毛虫回到了母毛毛虫家时,公毛毛虫却发现,母毛毛虫它戴着结婚戒指。
      公毛毛虫说:我不跟已婚母毛毛虫作这种事,
      母毛毛虫说:不要担心!我丈夫不会回来了,
      公毛毛虫说:?怎麽这麽确定呢!
      母毛毛虫说:他今天很早起床"去钓鱼了
      
      11. 一人经过一栋房子时,突然从二楼窗户飞下来一只用过的安全套,刚好落到 他的头上。
      这人感到即恶心又恼火,于是他走到这栋房子的大门口,使劲敲打大门,
      一个老头开了门,问他为什麽这麽大力敲门,
      这人质问道: “谁住在二楼?”
      老头回答:“这和你有什麽关系?上面住的是我女儿和她的未婚夫。”
      这人将那只安全套递给老头,说: “好吧,我只是想告诉你,你孙儿从窗户掉下来啦!”
    考试作弊

    1。高中时一次政治考试,最后一排一男生将课本摊在大腿上奋笔疾书,不料监考如乱马般

    悄无声息绕到其后,轻抚其肩。该生惊觉,面不改色曰∶对不起,桌肚里东西太
    多,放不下,只好让它待在腿上。随即低头继续疾书。全班倒。
    2。初中时隔壁的女同学在一次生物科考试中把书扔在地上,用脚趾翻书抄,偶一直很佩服

    她的眼力和脚趾的灵活性。
    3。女生把字写在大腿上,被监考得男老师看见了,叫她站起来,就是不敢叫她把裙子翻起

    来,结果那个女生考了第一。
    5。我有个同学大学考英语,他买了一盒绣花针,然后把老师所说的考试内容刻提前刻在了

    书桌上(我们的书桌是那种发亮的硬板),正正的看是看不到的,只能斜着看
    才能看到,他刻了一下午,刻钝了n 个针,最后手都麻木了,然后扔了一本书在桌子上占座

    。我想那张课桌会成为以后师弟、师妹们抢占的一张。
    6。我最赚的一次是什么也没有准备,一心以为要死定了,已经准备好重修费了!来到考场

    坐着发呆!结果监考老师要求大家换位子,我到新的位子坐下一看!哇哈哈哈
    哈!所有的答案都抄在桌子上,而且抄的很全!四处张望一下,发现一位兄弟正双眼喷火的

    盯着我!哈哈哈哈,结果这门课就顺利通过!!
    8。某人考试时一直睡觉然后快下考时醒了左右看了看,发现后面同学的卷子做完了还没写

    名字顺手拿过来写上自己名字交了……
    9。以前,偶女友mm是英语专业,偶不是。有一次偶系考大学英语,竟然临时叫来mm监考!

    偶看到她近来,差点昏倒~~~~全体哥们怒视偶,(偶考完被狂扁)偶的e文那是
    一塌糊涂,mm巡考,瞄到偶的试卷,差点气昏。与mm同来监考的是一40多岁中年男子,偶不

    认得,mm借故跟他聊天,挡住他视线,偶们狂抄啊!mm还对他巧笑倩兮,靠,
    便宜那个大叔了!(mm是外语系的系花)无奈不会的还是不会。mm过来看试卷,狠狠瞪偶一

    眼,悄悄指偶答题卡:猪头,都选错了!5分钟后,偶收到短信息,mm发的,
    全是答案!幸福ing……结果,由于一人得福,全班男生均及格!偶们e文老师狂夸偶班啊!

    从此,偶mm成为偶系的神~~~~
    10。一次考金工实习(补考),考试中偶们狂抄,交卷时监考老师给偶们检查考卷,指出偶

    们的错误,当场修改,结果偶们最低85分,可是考试前每人交给监考老师30元
    (美其名曰:补考费)。
    11。两同学,长得挺像!物理考试进行到65分钟,一人交卷,然后,一人上wc交卷的人继续

    进来考试!
    12。大二时,考试跟体育系的人隔排坐。我们同学尽皆大方,只要不影响我们,随便他们抄

    我们的试卷。有一强人从头到尾狂抄我们一个同学的试卷。考完交卷了,他很
    神秘的问我们同学,为什么那道大题要先写很多字,然后画个大框和大叉,然后再写一段啊

    ,是不是有什么格式规定?全体昏倒,是我们同学答了半天发现错了,划掉再
    写,他老人家竟然一丝不苟的全抄了……
    14。大二的时候,考英语,是分ab卷的,全是选择题。一兄弟在最后10分钟终于拿到答案,

    突然发现答案是a卷的,而自己的卷子是b卷。再拿答案已来不及。低头想了1
    分钟,开始抄。抄完了后,将答题纸角上那个“b”一把撕了,写了个“a”,就交了。分数

    出来,60分……全班对他五体投地。
    15。说个偶哥们的事儿吧,有次选修课考试,这哥们睡过头了,没去参加,只好无奈的等补

    考啦,结果成绩一公布,这哥们居然pass了。不是没抓人,抓了n个,但是没
    抓到他。全体兄弟汗~~~后来我们分析,那老师一定是把不及格的试卷挑出来,对着分数表

    挨个添上不及格,剩下的就全pass,唯独没想到还有没来考试的。
    我一哥们感冒,考试的时候拿一空白作业本擤鼻涕。考到一半年级主任视察,看见那哥

    们桌子上有几张叠起来的纸,过去就拆开检查, http://www.eshopgiants.com/ NY Giants Manning Jersey,看见的都开始窃笑。没想到主
    任发现一张不是后,很有耐心地把所有纸条都打开看了一遍,全场抓狂。
    我宿舍老大老六,玩cs一个学期,考前背了4天,都觉得很可能挂,决定放手一博,考

    场上答完题写上对方的名字交了。考完了还直说,给别人考试真没压力。
    在好多大学,年轻老师多,一般监考都很没意思,于是就看女生。漂亮女生学习又不好,于是后果可想而知,有次监考一个女生很漂亮,特妖艳那种,很出名,全楼
    的年轻老师都借故来看了一圈,可怜那女孩衣兜里的小条,一个没拿出来,只好补考,又被老师们参观一回。
    一哥们考模糊控制,考试时间两个小时。任课老师监考,边监考边摇头:“都是上课教了的呀,又不难,居然都做错了。书带了没?好好看看书!”快到点了,宣布:延长半个小时。又逛了十来分钟:“你们怎么学的呀,看着书都做错。象那样做是不对的!

    应该这样”转身上讲台开始板书讲解,写了一黑板,然后拍拍手:再延长半小时那个汗啊~~~~

    大三信息统计最后一节课,老师问我们愿意开卷考试还是闭卷,商量后大家选开卷,觉
    得好歹能抄点,回去后得知兄弟班选的闭卷,考试时间安排下来,他们还先考,考完后我们赶紧去打听题目,他们还说:不用啦,巨难,你们敢选开卷,肯定死透了,

    到时候拿书都抄不着。等一开考,晕倒,一样的卷子。成绩下来,兄弟班被抓了一大堆,怒,去找老头理论,老头说:你们自己选的闭卷,我又没说卷子不一样。21。据俺们老师讲隔壁兄弟学校监考老师抓一个作弊的可以奖励50元,结果一次抓住一女生

    小抄(一张纸条),正当老师拿着战果准备领奖,该女生扑上前去,一把夺回纸条并一口吞了下去,老师愕然,半晌才说了一句:“ 你比解放前地下党还厉害!”

    “亲爱的,你要做爸爸了,孩子的预产期可能是你的生日。你幸福吗?” 我幸福吗?亲爱的,我为了这个小子已经等了30年了!你说我幸福吗? 我发誓那一刻没有一只虱子能在我身上趴得住---如果有的话,我疯狂地跳啊,笑啊,叫啊……

    十分钟后,所有我知道的能收到短信的号码都收到了同样的短信:

    “俺要当爹了,恭喜老子吧!还和俺一天生日呢,也说不定!哈哈哈……”

    接下来是铺天盖地的回复:

    “恭喜了!为你感到幸福!”(这是最正常的)

    “行啊,大哥!厉害!多日不见,原来您在为祖国下一代规划蓝图呢,辛苦了辛苦了……”(这还是比较正常的)

    “等满月,一定送干儿一封大利市!”(这是比较实在的)

    “唉!明年又要多发一红包了!”(这是经济不宽裕的)

    “有你小子乐不出来的时候!”(这是一两岁孩子的爹)

    “那你小子还不赶紧请客,记得是大餐!”(这是就知道吃的)

    “等生了闺女再和我联系,儿子就免了!”(这是给儿子物色娃娃亲的)

    “那我可怎么办?看来是真的没戏了!”(这是一直对俺媳妇念念不忘的)

    “你这个叛徒!”(这是当初一起发誓不要孩子的)

    “好啊!等下出来看看长的到底像我还是像你,或者隔壁老赵!”(这是比较无耻的,竟然用“下”而不用“生”)

    “我就纳闷,你丫怎么一出差就当爹了呢?!”(这是非常无耻的!)

    “真的,大哥,我发誓,不是我的错!”(这是最让我吐血的!)

    “找他们算账去,‘杜蕾丝’也有质量不过关的时候?”(这是让我最不知道说什么的)

    “傻乐什么啊,你当爹,我还当爷爷呢!”(切!这谁啊!?这……这……的确是俺老
    子的。)

    “赶紧回家,咱家大小子的学费还等你交呢!”(这……这……这玩笑大了点吧!)

    “呵呵,可有得玩了,玩坏了别怪我啊!”(这是我弟弟的)

    “你老婆不方便的这几个月,你可以来找我”(这谁啊!这谁啊?我看看……流口水中……)“……喝酒!”(md!俩信息就不能搁一块儿发!?)



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  5. BlogIcon Rondo free jersey 2013.03.22 17:01 신고

    OFFSEASON ACTION


    Nothing exposes a franchise floating in the ether quite like an offseason of curiosity and indecision, of maneuvers unmade and ill-fated. To call the Rockies a rudderless ship at this moment would be an insult to rudders. This is a ship with a hole the width of its bow.

    Walt Weiss may turn out to be a perfectly good manager. He is, by many accounts, a good leader, and the Mike Matheny-Robin Ventura double-shot of neophyte success last season emboldened the Rockies to pluck Weiss from his position as a high school coach. The daily grind, the media obligations, the interpersonal relations – he did all that as a player, and having spent seven seasons as a Rockies special assistant, he understands the organization.
    Walt Weiss is managing under a one-year contract with the Rockies. (Getty Images)
    If Weiss is so promising, then, and if he is the man under whom the Rockies expect to crawl out from the rubble of the worst season in franchise history, how can they possibly rationalize offering him a one-year contract? This is not a manager fighting for his job after substandard performance; this is a manager starting a job, and starting a year after the team's starting pitchers put up a collective 5. 81 ERA, a problem the Rockies have addressed with aggression this offseason. And by aggression, we mean they re-signed Jeff Francis, who brought down the rotation's overall numbers with his 5. 58 ERA.

    Otherwise, this Rockies offseason has consisted of some thumb-twiddling, a couple of missed free agents and a trade of potential consequence. When considering whether to trade center fielder Dexter Fowler, coming off his breakout season, the Rockies asked for multiple pitchers in return or a disproportionate return, http://www.csnbroncos.com/ tony carter nike Jerey, like Kris Medlen. The Rockies considered going three years on reliever Mike Adams before watching him sign with Philadelphia.


    [More MLB Springboards: No. 30 Astros | No. 29 Marlins | No. 28 Mets]

    In their biggest deal, Colorado gave up Alex White, one of the centerpieces of the mutually awful Ubaldo Jimenez deal, for relief pitcher Wilton Lopez, who was on his way to Philadelphia until doctors looked at his elbow and wondered whether ligaments or mashed potatoes held it together. His MRI passed muster for the Rockies, and if indeed he remains healthy, it's a savvy move for general manager … oh, might as well start there when discussing the Rockies' long-term prognosis.

    REALITY CHECK

    Dan O'Dowd is the Rockies' general manager, only he doesn't manage the Rockies. Bill Geivett is the Rockies' senior VP of major league operations, which means he operates the major league team without control over the vital minor league system. The GM-by-committee system, much like the closer-by-committee system, could work if in the right hands. These are not the right hands.

    The Rockies are a humidor full of bad decisions, from not budging on the price of their surplus everyday players to Project 5, 183, O'Dowd's plan aimed at solving the perils of pitching in Denver. That the Rockies commissioned such an endeavor is in and of itself a good thing, and that they considered the merits of a four-man rotation even more so. Limiting those four pitchers to just 75 pitches, however, ultimately proved ineffective. And not just because the four pitchers they happened to use were no good.

    O'Dowd enters his 13th season, and in that time, the Rockies have all of five seasons from pitchers with more than four Wins Above Replacement: Joe Kennedy in 2004, Jason Jennings in '06, Aaron Cook in '08 and Jimenez in '09 and '10. The only teams with fewer such seasons are Pittsburgh, San diego and Baltimore, and, well, you can see the sort of company the Rockies keep.


    [Related: $10 million changes Lance Berkman's mind about DH]


    Carlos Gonzalez led the Rockies in RBIs with 85 last season. (Getty Images) No question: It is difficult to develop pitching in Colorado's thin air. And that's a shame, because – this sounds so 1998 – it's the only thing holding back the Rockies from success. A core of Troy Tulowitzki, Carlos Gonzalez, Fowler and Wilin Rosario is a really, really good place to start. Among Todd Helton, Jordan Pacheco, Chris Nelson and soon-to-arrive prospect Nolan Arenado, they've got a mish-mash of options at first and third base.

    Where Michael Cuddyer and his remaining two years and $21 million fit in here is not abundantly evident. For a team that will score runs, he is surplus value – the sort that, at a reasonable salary for his offensive production, would bring something back in a trade. Still, the Rockies are disinclined to do so, and considering the state of their rotation now – Jhoulys Chacin, the recovering Jorge de la Rosa and Juan Nicasio, Francis and one of the Drew Pomeranz-Tyler Chatwood-Christian Friedrich triumvirate – not trading hitting for pitching is active malice.

    It's not like there's much coming, either. The closest thing the Rockies have to pitching prospects are the low-upside Tyler Anderson and Edwar Cabrera. And if the payroll shearing stays consistent, Tulowitzki and Gonzalez could take up a combined half of the Rockies' budget by 2015. Whether both remain in a Rockies uniform by then is one of far too many questions surrounding a franchise that bumbled its way from the 2007 World Series to the bottom of the sport in half a decade.

    SAVIOR

    Ultimately, the leadership vacuum goes to the top of the franchise, where Rockies owner Dick Monfort allows his business to traipse along as if guided by Apple Maps. Inefficiencies are rife throughout baseball; management structure is not one of those inefficiencies. Organizations are big, unwieldy and best served by one person overseeing them. Perhaps because Monfort has run his family business with his brother Charlie he is warm to the idea of co-CEOs. It will not work in baseball, and the sooner Dick Monfort recognizes that, the sooner the Rockies will come to not wasting Tulowitzki and Gonzalez's prime years.

  6. BlogIcon 子母钟 2013.03.22 22:28 신고

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